Page 11 of Styx & Stones

CHAPTER SEVEN

STYX

Isit at my desk, mycomputer on, the cursor flashing. I have some stupid English lit paper due next week, and I’m pretty sure both my teacher and I know it’s not getting done, but sometimes going through the motions fools me into thinking that school is something I need to further my life goals. My parents, my teacher, and I all know it’s bullshit. I go because it’s just one less thing my mom has to worry about. Besides, it’s where Alaska is, so where the hell else would I be?

I close my laptop, grab my phone, and pull up her Instagram account. Her story is a video from twenty-two hours ago. She’s lying in bed, holding the phone out at arm’s length. I turn the volume up and flop down on my mattress. My stomach churns and revolts, and I squeeze my eyes tightly closed as the pain shoots through my abdomen.

“Another not-so-fun fact about cancer, Addicts, is that food tastes weird now. My mom’s shoving all of these green juices down my throat—and I couldn’t stand that shit at the best of times, but now, I get cravings for it. Maybe the radioactivity in my body is just begging for more green stuff so I can become like Mr. Burns in that episode ofThe Simpsons.” She laughs and nearly drops the phone. “Anyway, I’m gonna take a nap, because another fun cancer fact—all I want to do is sleep. Between the thunderclap migraines and the chemo, it’s a wonder my parents haven’t pulled me out of school, but Dad’s super Korean, so he’s all ‘you must get a formal education.’ Good grades, good college equals good job. I don’t know if anyone’s told him I might not make it long enough to graduate.”

Her smile vanishes. My heart is ripped right out of my chest. I think about dying a lot, but I don’t think about Stones dying. I just thought she’d be one of the lucky ones; she’s a fighter, a fucking warrior. Maybe she’ll live long enough to earn that coveted titled of survivor. Maybe she won’t. But I never thought of a world without her in it.

“See you soon, Aerosol Addicts.” She blows a kiss to the camera, but it lacks her usual ’tude.

I start typing a message.

@zedatwoodsbellybuttonlint: My dad is a serial wheatgrass juicer. WTF is wrong with parents TD?

Shit. I just slid into her DMs with the stupidest handle ever. God. Now I can never let her know it’s me. I stare at the screen for way too long and then throw it on the bed with a huge exhalation.

A beat later, it chimes.

@alaskasaerosoladdiction: Hey, nice handle. I know, right? Parents are weird.

I read the message several times, trying to see more in it than is actually there, hoping for her to take just a hint of interest. I’m a total girl right now.

@zedatwoodsbellybuttonlint: Thanks. I’ve been meaning to change it for years, but it’s a real lady-killer.

@alaskasaerosoladdiction: I bet. ??

@zedatwoodsbellybuttonlint: You’re really talented. And hey, my parents were freaking out the first time too. It’s natural. They calm down after a while. Mine were super tense all the time. My cancer cleared up, but their marriage didn’t.

@alaskasaerosoladdiction: Holy shit! You have cancer too?

@zedatwoodsbellybuttonlint: Yep. Stage three.

@alaskasaerosoladdiction: OMG. I’m so sorry.

@zedatwoodsbellybuttonlint: TY. It’s pretty fucked. How’s chemo? You start losing your hair yet?

@alaskasaerosoladdiction: Only a handful here and there in the shower. U?

@zedatwoodsbellybuttonlint: I got some patches going. Think I might try out a new look. I hear the combover is popular. YOLO, right?

@alaskasaerosoladdiction: LOL. Some of us don’t live at all. You have to DM me that shit.

@zedatwoodsbellybuttonlint: Oh, I’ll DM it.

@alaskasaerosoladdiction: Cool. I gotta go. Parents are taking me to some bullshit group therapy thing.

@zedatwoodsbellybuttonlint: Oh God, I hated group therapy. Church, hospital, or youth center?

@alaskasaerosoladdiction: Worse. Hospital chapel. Like I really want to go back there after spending hours in chemo

---