Page 53 of The Devil's Mercy

Like garbage instead of something that had once been a life.

Calix clutched onto Titus’s sleeve without realizing, his eyes still locked onto the hissing creature in the gilded cage. The tiny, pale pink collar with the golden bell helped create the illusion this was a regular pet auction, and nothing nefarious was going on. But he’d just been told otherwise and, honestly, he’d known as much even without the verbal confirmation.

Was he really going to repeat history? Was he going to sit here and watch and do nothing?

That event had been the start of the end for him in Sister Grace’s eyes. From that day on, he could do nothing right. She’d punish him for little things and watch him like a hawk, as though waiting for him to make a mistake. For him to hurt something or someone else.

His distorted recollection of the day the police came for him after Nero’s accident returned as well, correcting itself.

When she’d cried out to Light for mercy, she hadn’t been pleading on Calix’s behalf.

Because to her, Calix had always been a monster.

“Please,” it passed his lips, and once it had, his resolve shattered. “Mercy. Please, stop this.”

“I can’t stop the entire auction,” he replied, but all Cal really heard was no, and he couldn’t accept that.

“Bid on it.”

“I don’t need a pet.”

“I do.”

“You don’t.”

“I’ll take care of it.”

“Oh, little monster, you can’t even take care of yourself.”

Calix forced his gaze away from the creature and onto Titus, searching his expression for any hints. Not that he really needed them. He’d known all along what the older man wanted him to say.

“I did it.” It was easy enough not to think of that day when the one from when he was much younger was still so fresh on his mind. When there was a way for redemption caged right in front of him, ripe for the taking.

Calix could part with one truth to protect another, especially when he’d known from the beginning that Titus had never been fooled by him.

“I was angry. Nero had spread a rumor about me and Sister Grace, took photos of the bruises she’d left in the locker room when we were changing in gym. So, yeah. I did it. That idiot stepped in front of my car without even glancing my way, and that was the last straw. How dare he shove me into the limelight and not even have the decency to look at me? I hit the gas. On purpose. And,” he leaned in, pressing his trembling lips against the warm curve of Titus’s left ear, “I got hard the second I felt his body crash against the hood.”

“Would you do it again?”

“Yeah.” He should say no. That would be the smart thing to say.

But it wouldn’t be honest.

Up until sleeping with Aodhan, hitting Nero with his car had been the second biggest mistake of his life. Of course he should want a redo. Go back in time and make a different choice and save himself the grief.

Titus would see right through him if he tried to fib, though.

Just like how he’d seen right through everything else.

“Did you know?” he dared ask, pulling back enough that he could look at Titus’s face, all while his hand reached down to grab onto his wrist. “Is that why we’re really here?”

Calix lifted the director’s hand into the air, the paddle going up just in time to add their bid to the running. His holdtightened, refusing to allow Titus to lower it, even though the director hadn’t fought him yet.

It didn’t matter if it was a trick though. Didn’t matter if they’d brought him here to dangle a part of his past before him like a carrot on a stick.

Letting that creature die when he’d been eight had been the biggest mistake he’d ever made. Had turned into his biggest regret and set off a lifetime of pain and suffering, at both the hands of his caretaker and himself.

He couldn’t let it happen again.