Page 12 of Einar

Ihold back even more tears.

Thisis the first time in longer thanIcare to admit that someone, or anyone excluding my sister in the last day or so, has touched me with such care.

“Honey, your nose is broken, but that can be fixed.Ithink the rest is just muscle and flesh damage, but some places are still too swollen for me to tell.”

Herwords cause my eyelids to flicker beforeIopen them.Lookingup into her tender face,Ican see the compassion in her eyes as she pats me on the shoulder before turning to the food filled tray, talking as she starts handing us plates. “Goahead girls, eat up before your eggs get cold.Yourears still work while your fingers feed the body.Janetwanted me to give you the directions to where she’s going to meet up with you.I’vealready spoken to her on the phone, so she knows what you’re driving, and is preparing a room for both of you now.

“Thetruck stop is on a main road, so it’s not hard to find, butI’vewritten detailed instructions down on this piece of paper for you to make it easier.Iunderstand more than you realize what you’ve been through and what you’ll be facing in the future.”

Iabsently note the piece of paper she references asIslowly ease food into my mouth.Eatinghurts, butI’mstarving soIdon’t have a choice.Chewingslowly and methodically takes up all of my concentration, soIdon’t react whenEdithreaches over, gently patting my arm asIpoke the baconIwant to devour with my fork.

Edith’snext words catch me by surprise.

“Dear, right now you feel like a failure, worthless, and not important enough to put your sister in danger, or anyone else for that matter.Letme tell you, all of that is in your mind.Youare worth something too!Everytime you doubt yourself, say those words over and over in your head.Ittakes a huge amount of faith, trust, and strength to escape the world you’re running from, but one day, that single step will have been worth all of this.Yousee, it’s the hardest, that first step of anything in life is always the most trying.You’realready over the worst of it, doll.Nowit’s time to heal and find your new path forward.”

Idon’t know how she knew the exact right words to use, but she did.Myhunched posture straightens as her words bolster some part of myselfIdidn’t know was still left.IfIlook up,I’llstart crying, andI’msick and tired of it … but those words…they give me enough strength to finish the eggs and the bacon on my plate.

Rubyspeaks for me.She’ssuch agood sister.

“Edith, you have been so kind to us, and we’ll be forever grateful for all your help.Whatdo we owe you for the room and this wonderful breakfast?”

“Nothing.AllIask is that one day you pay it forward to another.Whetherit be a kind word or picking someone up out of a ditch.Maybeit will be as simple as saving a stray animal.You’lllearn that nothing is more fulfilling than kindness to another.”

Abruptly,Edithgets up. “Leaveyour dishes in the sink.Ihave a girl who works here part time to clean the rooms, and it will give her something to do.Youtwo need to get on the road sooner rather than later.Menare dangerous when their toys are taken away, so get as much distance as you can from those who seek to hurt you.Onelast piece of advice for you both is never stop looking over your shoulder.Youmight be able to run, even separate yourself from your past, but nevertheless, it is still yours to follow along behind you.Iwish you bothGod’sspeed.”

ChapterTen

ROWAN

Asmall smilecreases my face asIwatchRubywave atEdithas we pull out of the hotel parking lot, heading south.Assoon as the hotel leaves my sight, the smile slips from my face asIstare out the window.Onceagain,I’mlost in dark thoughts about all the thingsI’vedone wrong up to this point in my life.

“Sis, we have several hours before we get to the next stop.Talkto me.”

Myhead falls just a bit at her words.Iknew this was coming … but she’s not going to like anythingIhave to say, andIknow she won’t stop badgering me untilItell her something.

“Idon’t know what to say,Ruby.I’mscared …I’veruined everything for us both.”

Myhesitant words instantly get my spicy sister’s attention.

“Whatthe hell are you talking about?”

Herquestion is a harsh bark that makes me flinch a bit, butIpush that aside and force myself to answer her instead of fading back into the blank space in my head.

“Ruby, this is all your life will be from this moment on … running.Foreverlooking behind you, never trusting in anyone, no roots anywhere, and always wondering if someone is going to recognize you every time you’re out and about.Continuouslyexpecting the worst out of people, no matter how good they are to you.

Sighingheavily,Ifully explain my situation to her, the words so painfulImust force them from my tortured throat. “Heisn’t going to divorce me,Ruby.Itwould cause a scandal, and he won’t do anything to hurt his career.Robertisn’t going to stop untilI’mback, and this time he’ll make it feel likeIwas in a funhouse before.Iwon’t survive even one night ifIgo back, but maybe that would be best for all of us.I’venot only ruined my own life by my stupid bad decisions, but now yours too.”

“Thefuck you willRowan!Stopthis shit right now!You’venever been the type to cry ‘poor little me’ and you’re stronger than you realize right now.Hellsis, less than twenty-four hours ago, you escaped a really bad situation in one piece.Yes,Iknow you feel and look like crap right now, but those wounds will heal inside and out.

Iget it, your whole life has been upended by a single decision.You’requestioning yourself, and that’s normal.Rightnow, you can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel, but at least you’re moving forward.Asfor me, hell,Ihaven’t had roots in years.Youknow that better than anyone and you knowIdon’t do anythingIdon’t want to, ever.Youhaven’t messed anything up for me.Iwas walking in circles before you called, and my life was going nowhere.

Littlesister, as crazy as things are right now, we will find a way to get you away from that bastard permanently, one way or another.Doyou understand me?Iwill not stand by and allow that monster to lure you back, even if you think it’s for the best.BecauseIcan guarantee this isn’t going to be the first time you think if you go back, it will all be better.Butyou know that’s simply a lie you’re telling yourself, even if you don’t want to admit it right now.

Assad as this sounds, that house of horrors had become comfortable, your version of normal.Nowyou’re out here struggling to figure out which way to go and what’s next.Youknew the momentIsaw those bruises in that mirror, let alone when you said our safe word, thatIwas coming.Anddon’t think for one momentIdidn’t come there willingly.Youdidn’t drag me there,Rowan.Ireckon the only wayIcan make you see this differently is by asking … if this situation had been reversed, would you have done the same for me?”

“YouknowIwould have.”

AndIwould have.I’mnot sure how, butIwould’ve managed it.

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