Page 52 of Cove City: Vol. I

They dapped each other up, and Pierre then walked past me like I was a nobody. That alone set me the fuck off. My cousin wasn’t the same nigga anymore and without him I was alone.

Ipaced the shop while I waited for Pierre to show up. My nerves were all over the place. We had set to meet tomorrow, but he called and told me what the Zoo did, and I knew there would come a point I would have to choose a side. However, I knew Pierre. I could tell when he was lying, and I needed to know if what Chevy did was warranted. I needed to know if he set that shop on fire. I blew out a sharp breath to control my nerves. My phone vibrated on the table near me. When I glanced at it, I saw Zeus calling. As soon as I went to pick it up, Pierre walked in, and I set the phone down.

He stood there glaring at me. I was expecting anger or irritation, but it was sadness and compassion. My shoulders dropped as he walked toward me. “Why did it take this long for this to happen?” he calmly asked.

I watched as Pierre’s mouth moved. Something was different. He was different. His grills were gone. I’d never seen him without them, and knowing he had taken them out told me he was changing. “What do you mean?” I asked, trying to focus onhis words and not his mouth.

He dropped his head. “Sasha, don’t do that. Why did it take for some crazy shit to happen for us to be able to come together and talk. You ran from me like we don’t share something.”

I fiddled with my hands, then pointed at him, “You were chasing me. I moved on, and you couldn’t. What was I supposed to do? I told you to back the fuck off!” I shouted.

Now I was becoming angry. I rushed toward him, “I asked you to leave me alone!” I screamed in his face.

He nodded. “Let it out. Scream if you have to but a nigga’s not leaving until we both get how we feel off our chest.”

So, I hit him again and again. “I hate you! I fucking hate you!”

I hated that he wasn’t there when I lost the baby. I hated him for choosing his friends over me. I hated him for not loving me when I needed it, but I appreciated him for pushing me away to someone that I would choose every day of the week. I could feel the tears welling in my eyes.

Pierre stuck his hand in his pocket and pulled something out. He turned it around and I broke. I cried. I snatched it out of his hand as I glanced at it. “You know I have never forgiven myself since that night,” he paused. “A nigga felt,” he paused again.

He pointed to his chest, as I could see he was choking up. “How you think I felt knowing my girl, someone I loved, caring my fucking seed was hurt? Huh? Knowing you were out there, and some muhfuckin bitch ass nigga hurt you to the point you lost the baby?” a tear spilled from his eyes. “I tried being there for you any way I could, but you, you didn’t want to be touched, talked to, nothing!” he shouted, making me jump back.

My eyes grew. “I was suffering!” I screamed to the top of my lungs. “To know that your body is not your body in that moment hurts! Time and time again, it happened to me, and I was suffering only this time, I can’t have fucking kids because of it. I needed you and you chose Bishop!” I screamed again.

“I was suffering too!” he shouted. “You’re making this about you when it was supposed to be about us. You didn’t just lose a baby, Sash, I did too. That shit hurt me. I sat up all night and fucking cried. I cried for you, me, and my seed that I would never get an opportunity to meet. I wanted a forever with you, but didn’t want a forced forever.”

“Forced?I never wanted to force you, but I also wouldn’t sit around and wait. You chose what you wanted, and it wasn’t me.”

Another tear spilled from his eyes and mine. Knowing I could no longer carry a baby hurt me to my core, and what hurt the most was that I needed to tell Zeus. I had finally found a love of my own, and he wanted to marry me and give me everything I wanted, but I could never give him children. I felt cheated.

“You know Quinton was there to save me that night. He was the one who had taken me to the hospital. He said he called you, but you never answered. Right then I knew you didn’t give a shit about me.”

Wrinkles formed in his forehead. “He never called me Sash, I swear. Quinton told me he wasn’t there.”

I was confused. I didn’t understand, which made me try to remember because I could have sworn that’s what he said. “He was. He was there when I woke up.”

I could see his wheels turning just as mine were. The way he glared at me was different. I had waited years for him to look at me as he was looking now. Pierre flicked his nose as he held shame in his face because he knew I was right. He stepped closer, and I stepped back. “I,” he shrugged. “I have no excuse. I fucked up Sash and all a nigga can do is apologize. I’m sorry I wasn’t there. I’m sorry I wasn’t the man you needed me to be. I’m fucking sorry. My ways back then are different than what they are now. Just as you needed someone to help you heal so did I. A nigga been in these streets for a long time and with all the chaos I had going on all I wanted was you to be right therewhen I needed just as you wanted me there when you needed. We weren’t, and here we are.”

I didn’t know what Pierre and I thought we had back then. I saw love and marriage, and he saw a life partner. He reached out and stroked my face. “You been letting that nigga put his hands on you?” he asked me.

My face frowned. “Zeus would never do no shit like that. Pierre, you know me better than that.”

“You don’t have to lie to me. Remember, we were friends first.”

“And I’m not!” I wiped my tears.

He came closer to me, reaching out and wiping my tears, pulling me in for a hug. “I’m dead ass sorry. I know you’re happy and I’m not here to ask you to take me back, but that shit has been sitting with me, and we needed this.”

“I agree.”

“Besides, I think I found my one.”

I lifted from his chest to look at him. “Tuesday? The girl who swears y’all not together.”

He laughed. “Yeah,” he paused. “I love her.”

Love?Hearing him say that stung because those words were something I had waited over two years to hear, and he loved a woman he had only known for a short time. “Love, huh?”

---