Page 47 of Taking Adalisa

“I need to go home,” I tell him, holding my breath as I wait for his answer.

Is he going to be mad at me for wanting to go home? Nerves run through my body, making me nauseous as I wait for his answer. Why is he waiting so long? I know Matthias would never physically hurt me.

“Why?” he finally asks. “Why do you need to go home?”

“I have things to do,” I whisper. “I have to get ready for work tomorrow. I need to write a report on why I closed early and come up with an excuse that my boss will believe. She may not care, but she want to know why.”

My boss is the least of my worries. She wouldn’t care at all if I didn’t give her a reason, but Matthias can’t know that, or else he isn’t going to let me go home.

“I need to get some sleep. I’m exhausted and a lot has happened in the past twelve hours,” I honestly reply.

What I wouldn’t do to sleep with his arms around me for the whole night and possibly have him bring me pleasure as he wakes me up. To feel safe and secure all night long. That would be the dream, but I’m not going to voice it. If he knows that’s what I want, he is never going to let me go. If I spend the night here and then manage to get away from him, I don’t know if I’ll be able to sleep peacefully again.

I sigh. “I just need to wrap my brain around everything. I need to think things through, and I can’t do that around you.” My voice breaks when he doesn’t speak. I need to fill this silence. “I just need some time to myself so I can think about everything. You aren’t making thinking easy.”

It feels good to get that off my chest. Let Matthias know that I’m trying to deal with everything. Does he think it doesn’t affect me at all?

“I don’t like it,” he mumbles, his hold on me tightening a little.

“I don’t like being held hostage either,” I retort. “One of us is going to have to give in and it’s not me.”

I feel like Matthias wouldn’t let anyone else get away with talking to him like that. But he needs to know he can’t just walk all over me. I won’t allow it.

I pull away from him so I can see his face. It’s blank, no emotions at all, and I’m annoyed.

“I’m not giving up. I need time to think,” I insist. “I need time to do the things I need to do some life admin. I can’t spend the night.”

I’m starting to worry that he is catching on to what I’m trying to do.

No.

I need to believe that he doesn’t unless he tells me. Maybe I’m just that good at keeping it a secret, and he doesn’t suspect anything.

“Life admin? What in your life needs to get done?” he asks, cocking his head to the side.

I suck in a breath. What do I say?

“Well, Margery is one. She is part of my life, and I need to figure out where she is and if she is okay,” I tell him. “Second, I’m thinking about changing jobs. Third, I have a lot of laundry that needs to get done, or else my apartment is going to start smelling, which I don’t want. Do you want me to continue because I have other things on my to-do list?”

“Please, do.” He smiles.

“I need to go grocery shopping and cook. I don’t enjoy take-out food much, and if I don’t go grocery shopping tonight, I won’t have anything to eat. I need to fix my leaky faucet and clean my bathroom,” I go on, making things up. “I have a schedule, and I stick to it. You are not going to interrupt my schedule.”

“Your schedule?” Matthias raises an eyebrow. “I don’t remember you having a schedule when I was watching you.”

Shit. Shit. Shit.

Abort. Abort. Abort.

I’ve backed myself into a corner here.

“Well, it’s been in the past month. I don’t know how you’ve missed it, but it’s there. Someone told me that I need to stick to a schedule if I want to improve my life. That I may thrive off a schedule so I am trying it but they say you can’t deviate from it or else you have to restart,” I ramble.

Matthias hums and looks at me. Does he believe me? I need him to so I can get out of here and start my plan.

“Let me feed you first, and then I will drop you off at home myself,” Matthias finally offers as he gently places me on thekitchen counter. I hiss and lean forward, trying to alleviate the pain. “Stay where I put you. If you try to get off or move, I will give you a timeout or another spanking.”

“I don’t want to sit on my bottom right now,” I tell him. “I am perfectly capable of standing and staying in one spot.”

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