Page 176 of With Us

“That means Christmas time.”

My lips curved down in a small frown. Growing up, holidays were pretty much nonexistent. Since I didn’t know better, it’d been easy to feel as if I wasn’t missing out.

Except Christmas.

When decorations and advertisements started earlier and earlier each year, there was no escaping the white bearded beast. Most of the homes I’d been in had tried to do something special, but it had usually been resource center clothes andoff-off-brand toys. Every commercial, store, and newspaper had detailed all the latest and greatest must-haves. Kids were filled with excitement for weeks beforehand as they’d listed all their wish list items, and even more so after when they’d confirm which items Santa had left under their tree.

I’d known the truth.

My first Christmas in foster care, one of the kids had told me that Santa only brought presents to him, the ‘real’ kid. When I’d asked the mom, she’d told me it was true her son would be the only one getting good gifts, but it was becauseshewas the one buying them. She’d smiled sweetly, honestly thinking she was saving a four-year-old from disappointment. In actuality, she’d killed one of the last bits of whimsy I’d had.

I had no bad feelings about Thanksgiving, which was why I’d been so excited to celebrate it with Theo’s family. Christmas, however, was a different story.

Correctly reading my expression, Theo stood and came over to where I sat on the couch. Gripping my hand, he pulled me standing before cupping my cheek. “It’ll be fun. Trust me.”

Even though I seriously doubted his words, I shrugged. “Let’s go get festive.”

He gave me a dimpled grin and kissed my forehead. “That’s my girl.”

‘My girl.’

So hot.

Oh, I’m in trouble.

???

“How many lights do we need?” I asked, watching Theo dump a load of them into the massive cart.

He lifted one of the boxes of hanging icicle style lights I’d picked out. “These are the outside ones.”

“I figured as much.” I touched the hanging display strand. “It’d be kind of hard for them to hang on the tree. You wouldn’t be able to see any green.”

“I don’t know, it’s a pretty big tree.”

“True.”

Because Gus had an aversion to any and all plant life, I’d suggested we get a fake tree. It was still giant and full.

“Which tree lights do you like?” Theo asked.

Scanning the shelves, I picked out the most colorful ones they had. I scanned the box. “They blink in different patterns. Fun.”

Theo added a few more boxes to the cart.

“We don’t have to get so much,” I said, still not feeling it. It seemed like a waste to spend so much time and energy on decorations that would only be up for a couple weeks.

“Give it a chance,” he urged for probably the tenth time since we’d begun shopping.

I held in a sigh. “What’s next?”

He held out an arm to gesture around us. “Whatever you want.”

Walking together, my arm linked with his as he pushed the cart, we made our way through the stocked aisles. Every once in a while, I’d grab something hideous just to watch his momentary panic. Sometimes, like with a glittery unicorn in pink lederhosen ornament, I’d actuallyget the item because it was so amazingly insane.

After adding a few more things, we checked out and loaded the car.

“Ready to go to the next place?” Theo asked.

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