Page 37 of The Bad Mother's Diary

Alex said, ‘Are you talking about the fire? I hardly ever think about that. Not anymore.’

I said, ‘Jemima visits you a lot. Does she like Great Oakley?’

Jemima is Alex and Zach’s (very) little sister.

A few years ago, Catrina Dalton had an affair with a 20-something Greek underwear model, and Jemima was the result.

Jemima is seven-years old, but has a designer wardrobe and a modelling contract with Gap. She’s the sweetest little girl you could ever meet, and always totally polite and well behaved. It’s amazing really, because her mum is horrible.

Jemima goes to a private boarding school in London during the week, but comes to the village at weekends and during the holidays.

‘She loves the village,’ said Alex. ‘Just like I did as a child.’

That surprised me. Because as a child, Alex never seemed all that happy.

Zach was always as bouncy and cheerful as they come, but Alex was more serious. Not exactly withdrawn, but quite stern. People rarely messed with him, put it that way.

I suppose he and Zach do have different dads.

‘Does Zach like the family home too?’ I asked.

Alex said, ‘Yes – but that’s irrelevant. I own it. I bought Zach out years ago.’

‘But he’s always staying there,’ I said.

‘He treats the place like a hotel,’ said Alex, with a wry smile. ‘So does my mother. Must be something about being a Dalton. But I’m happy for the family to stay whenever they like – especially Jemima. It will always be her home.’

I said, ‘But isn’t Jemima’s real home with your mother? In London?’

Alex said, ‘She feels more comfortable in Great Oakley with Zach and I. Surely that’s obvious?’

I asked how Jemima found boarding school. I mean, it must be lonely – living away from her family.

Alex said, ‘She’s learning independence. Just like Zach and I did.’

Alex and Zach went to Windsor College, where they foster confidence, perseverance, tolerance and integrity. (Us Duffys went to Oakley Primary, where they foster a tolerance of powdery mashed potato.)

‘But didn’t you feel lonely as a boarder?’ I asked.

Alex said, ‘Sometimes. But it was good for me.’

I asked Alex if he remembered playing in the woods when we were kids.

Alex looked very serious and said, ‘Of course I do.’

When we got back to the apartment, Alex crossed his arms, frowned and said, ‘Goodbye Juliette. I’ll come again next week. Same time.’

And off he went.

Nick was all grumpy when I got in, asking me how ‘fancy pants Dalton’ could run with a ‘gold watch between his arse cheeks’.

Thursday March 26th

Sadie called round today to talk about running outfits.

She was pretty annoyed that I’d been jogging without her – especially when she found out Alex Dalton came round last night.

She said, ‘YouknowCatrina heads a modelling agency. If I date Alex or Zach … poof! I get on the cover of Cosmo.’

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