Page 36 of Don't Tell Teacher

‘Is this something to do with the Neilsons?’ I ask.

‘I don’t want to say, Mum,’ says Tom. ‘Please.’

‘Tom, this is serious. If your teacher isn’t telling the truth—’

‘I don’t want to talk any more,’ says Tom. ‘It’s giving me tummy ache.’

Tom learned that from his father, I’m sure. Close everything down. Pretend it’s not happening and it will go away.

‘Tom, it’s good to talk about things,’ I say. ‘I know your father and I didn’t set you the best example. But you and I have always been friends. Friends talk to each other.’

‘I’m tired,’ says Tom. ‘I want to go to bed.’

‘You’ve been tired a lot recently. Are yousureyou’re feeling okay? Remember you had a seizure not so long ago.’

‘Just sleepy. School is stressy, trying to work out what to do all the time. The rules here are different. All the colours are different. And Mrs Dudley shouts if I ask questions. I want to go to bed.’

‘Finish your tea first.’

‘I’m not hungry.’

‘Just eat a little bit more, Tom. Then you can go up.’

Tom’s fork clinks on the plate, scooping up more potato.

‘I wish you could tell me what happened with that little girl. Did Paulymakeyou do something?’

Tom eyes widen in alarm. It’s the most awake he’s looked since he got home. ‘Don’t sayanythingabout Pauly.Ihit her, okay?Idid it.’ Tom looks at his plate.

‘Okay,’ I say, trying to stay calm. ‘But why would you hit someone?’

‘Maybe I just felt angry. Like Dad used to.’

‘Are you being bullied, Tom? What you just said about Pauly—’

‘Pauly’s not doinganything. We … we’re friends.’

Sometimes, I see Tom walk out of school with Pauly. It doesn’t look friendly. It looks menacing. Like Tom is being forced into conversation.

I can feel the glances of other mothers, hear their judgements …

Those Neilson boys are trouble. So that new boy must be trouble too.

‘No need to make friends too quickly,’ I say. ‘Not after what we’ve been through with your father. Reputations can be catching.’

‘You don’t understand.’ Tom puts his fork down. ‘I have to be friends with Pauly. If I’m not … I just have to be, that’s all.’

‘Maybe I should speak to the headmaster—’

‘No! Nothim. Or Mrs Dudley. They’re not on our side. I’m handling it and it’s okay. Pauly’s all right. His mummy isn’t well, that’s all. Social services keep saying she’s unfit, so it makes him angry.’

Unfit.

They said that about Olly too.

Unfit to parent.

And suddenly, I realise it’svitalTom stays away from the Neilsons. This is a new start. I want us to be perfect. No more ugly black marks.

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