Page 22 of Love or Your Money Back

‘Look, I’ve been busy. And vegan DMs last a lifetime.’

‘Don’t you think you’re worth new clothes every so often?’

‘I hadn’t thought about it like that. I just don’t have time to worry about what I look like.’

‘Do you know what I see when I look at your clothes?’ Freddy asks.

Kat shakes her head.

‘Someone who’ll settle for crumbs at the banquet of life.’

‘Well, people can think what they like –’

‘Exactly,’ Freddy snaps. ‘That’s exactly right. People can and will think exactly what they like. And in a competitive market, people make snap judgements. Rightly or wrongly. You might not like it, but it’s true. You need to show who youreallyare. With fresh, up-to-date packaging. You’re up against women who look like this.’

Freddy clicks the presentation screen again. Pictures of well-dressed, stylish businesswomen wearing tall boots, designer sunglasses and fitted suits and dresses appear on the screen.

‘Isn’t this all a little shallow?’ Kat asks. ‘I want someone who loves me for me.’

‘Yes,’ says Freddy. ‘So show them who you are. Tell the world you’re a successful career woman. The sooner we repackage you, the better. Today, ideally.’

‘Freddy, I don’t have time. Gabriela is threatening to proofread –’

‘Is Gabriela the orangey-haired one, wired on caffeine with cat fur all over her jumper?’

‘Yes, that’s her.’

‘What does the fat, bald guy do?’

‘Duncan? He handles everything digital. Uploading manuscripts, anything techy. Social media.’

‘Social media isn’t tech. It’s marketing.’

‘It’s computer-based.’

‘That doesn’t make it tech. You need to organise your workforce better. Get clearly defined job roles. I’ll get my team on it.’

‘Look, you’re probably right, but one disaster at a time. I do need to get back –’

‘No!’ Freddy barks. ‘Work will still be a disaster tomorrow. Project Marriage comes first.’ He reaches into his inside jacket pocket and hands Kat a wedge of crisp, fifty-pound notes. ‘Take this. Go shopping. Right now.’

‘Haven’t you heard of debit cards?’

‘Yes. I have five of them. And various platinum credit cards. But there’s nothing quite like a big pile of cash in your inside pocket. Take it. Go on.’ Freddy proffers the money.

‘How many clothes are you expecting me to buy, exactly?’ Kat takes the notes in both hands like a rodent that might bite.

‘An outfit.’

‘One outfit? For …’ She counts the notes. ‘Five thousand pounds? How on earth am I supposed to spend five thousand pounds on one outfit?’

‘Shop in expensive places,’ says Freddy.

‘So you’re saying expensive is better?’

‘Not at all,’ says Freddy. ‘It’s about the story you tell, not the money you spend. But expensive places are a lot more ethical about fabric, production and staffing policies. Which I thought would sit well with you.’

Kat makes a grudging sniff. ‘What should I buy?’

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