Page 88 of Love or Your Money Back

I pause, partly for dramatic effect, partly because my left leg is trying to kick Margot Fick and I need to concentrate on reigning it in. With some effort, I lift the European Publisher of the Year award.

‘This year, I told myself to stop believing in fairy tales.’

There is gentle laughter.

‘But this is a fairy tale. And nothing feels better than winning this award with my friends …’ I turn to Freddy. ‘Especially you, Freddy Stark. You saw us for what we could be. And believed in us.’

The room bursts into applause again. I put the award in my lap and seek out Freddy’s eyes. He puts a hand on my shoulder.

‘Just think,’ Freddy whispers. ‘If you can win this award, what else can you do?’

Freddy holds eye contact, brown eyes so bright, and I see it. What he’s been avoiding these past few weeks and what I’ve also been hiding from in my own different ways.

Stomach-dropping, fairy-tale, rollercoaster, fireworks love. The kind that sweeps you off your feet and, very possibly, runs you over.

Freddy reaches a hand to my cheek. I cover it with mine, staring back.

‘Kat?’ Duncan taps my shoulder. ‘Do you need help carrying the award?’

I drop my hand, flustered. ‘Oh! No. I can carry it on my lap. It’s fine.’

I look around, wondering how many people noticed mine and Freddy’s moment. Then I see Ahmet standing at the back of the room, lips pulled down.

CHAPTER63

The team carry me from the stage with the European Publisher of the Year trophy lying in the folds of my skirt, like a very well-behaved lap dog. Once I hit the carpet, I wheel myself at speed to the back of the room.

‘Ahmet. Hi.’ My eyes lock on Ahmet’s knees, too awkward to look up. ‘You managed to get in without a ticket. Well done. I hear the security here is pretty tough –’

‘Shall we talk?’ Ahmet asks.

‘Yes.’ I swallow. ‘I think that’s a good idea. Let’s go outside.’

It’s cold and dark outside the Kaiserhaal, and I shiver in my velvet dress.

‘You’re cold.’ Ahmet removes his jacket and places it around my arms. ‘Here. Take this. I suppose congratulations are in order.’

‘Thank you.’

‘It was wonderful to see you up there with the team. Katerina, about you and Freddy –’

I take a deep breath. ‘Ahmet, you’re a wonderful man. But …’

‘I knew there was a but coming.’ Ahmet gives a short, nervous laugh. ‘How long has it been going on?’

‘Nothing has been going on.’ I take a deep, shuddering breath. ‘Ahmet, you’re wonderful, but being with you would be settling. Tonight has shown me that miracles can happen. I can have more than I ever dreamed possible.’

‘Katerina.’ Ahmet takes my hands. ‘I can do better. Please. Give me another chance. I admit, maybe I’ve come to this relationship a little too … practically. My family want me to get married and that has overshadowed what should be a more passionate meeting of minds –’

‘Ahmet, you haven’t done anything wrong,’ I say. ‘But I want love with a capital L. The kind my mother was thinking about when she helped make the Meeting Place Statue at St Pancras station. Two people who set each other’s worlds alight. I don’t know if I’ll find it in my lifetime. But I’m going to hold out for it, nonetheless.’

I slide Ahmet’s engagement ring off my finger and pass it to him. ‘Thank you. For everything. You’ll make some lucky girl a wonderful husband.’

‘I understand.’ Ahmet gives me a tired smile. ‘I’ll take you back to the hotel. And then I’ll get packed and hop on the next flight back to London.’

‘Okay,’ I tell Ahmet. ‘I’d still like us to be friends.’

Ahmet manages the glimmer of a smile. ‘Yes. I’d like that too. You know, fairy tales are simple. It’s the believing that’s hard work.’

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