Page 33 of Clover

“Now, in your empty space, think of Clover. Not of what she’s gone through or how she was hurt. Just her. Her smile, her laugh. The feel of her hair through your fingers. Let it calm you. Knowing she is safe, healthy, and loved. Do not let the anxiety and anger interfere withher.”

Thinking of Clover is easy enough. Trying not to think of her naked and sweaty moaning my name is a little more difficult. But I manage to stop myself before that fantasy takes over. Popping a boner in the middle of a meditation lesson led by Magnus in his home isn’t appropriate. So, I focus just on Clover. Her bright, vibrant blue eyes, that thick auburn red hair twisting around my fingers as it blows in the breeze, I can feel it licking across my skin. The sing-song tone of her giggle as my fingers brush the sensitive skin on her neck. Peace and calm possess my body, and I feel the weight lifting. The boulder of despair cracking and rolling off my chest. This meditation shit actually works.

I can faintly recognize Magnus’s voice still coaching me through, but it’s like a quiet soundtrack running in the background. You know it’s there but don’t really know what it sounds like. When I feel his hand on my shoulder, I open my eyes to see the sun has moved farther down the horizon. How long was I like that?

“How do you feel?” Magnus asks, now standing at my side, having vacated his marshmallow seat.

“Good. Great, actually.”

“See. Told you to trust me.”

“So you did. How long was I like that?”

“About an hour.”

“Holy shit. An hour? It felt like five minutes.”

“Yeah.” He chuckles. “Happens to me too sometimes. There are just those times when your body and mind need the reprieve.” He turns and makes his way into the house heading for the large kitchen.

Standing, I stretch out my limbs which are the only indicators that I have been sitting there for an hour. My left foot fell asleep, and my knees are a little stiff from the slightly bent position.

“Here.” Magnus hands me a cold-water bottle which I open and promptly chug. I didn’t know I was this thirsty till I started drinking.

“Did it help answer your questions?”

“What?”

“The meditating. I assume you came here with questions and wanted guidance. Did it help?”

This man has got to be some sort of mind reader. He knows me way too well. Then I think about it. I came here because I was stressed and concerned about Clover. While meditating, the stress and anxiety disappeared, and a sort of clarity came over me. Clover will be fine and eventually will let me in. I just have to be patient and not push her. Give her the space she needs and be there for her when she’s ready.

“Yeah, actually. It did.”

“Good.”

Chapter 18

Phoenix

I’m going out of my fucking mind. I know meditating with Magnus cleared my mind and shit, but being back at home with Clover so near knowing she’s under my roof and safe, and I can’t be near her, can’t touch her, kiss her. Tell her she’s everything to me no matter what. It’s literally driving me crazy. I tried meditating again on my own, but it’s just not the same as it was at Magnus’s house. He must live on magical land or something.

Deciding that maybe a long hot shower would help, instead, I let the hot water wash away the stress and tension along with the tightness in my muscles caused by an entire second night of a one-sided battle with the punching bag, and no sleep, again. It does its job, invigorating me and soothing the aches and pains. Clover remained in her room again for the whole day yesterday, and I don’t know how much longer I can be patient.

When I step out of my bathroom wearing nothing but my boxer briefs, I find Clover there. Sitting on my floor swaying rhythmically to a song I cannot hear. She’s completely naked except for underwear and a bra. The rest of her clothes strewn around her on the floor.

What the hell is she doing?If this is some sort of seduction, it’s one I’ve never seen before.

“Clover?” I call her name as I approach her cautiously so as not to startle her. Her big round eyes catch on me, and her smile is broad and beautiful. To see her smile again nearly puts me on my ass.

“Oh, hey, Nix. There you are. I’ve been waitingforeverfor you to come out.” She sounds drunk with a little giggle in her speech. Like a child, she crawls to her feet and prances over to me. Wrapping her arms around my waist and grinning up at me, all smiles and giggles through her white-toothed grin.

“What are you doing, sweet cheeks?”

“Oh, I was just making all the bad thoughts go away.” She’s still smiling. It’s getting creepy.

“How?”

“The same way you do silly.” She coos. Her hands are all over me, running across my pecs and abs, wrapping around my hips and biceps. It’s like no matter how much she tries, she can’t touch me enough. And it’s doing things to me. To my dick. Which has been missing her soft skin and dirty mouth. I didn’t think she would want anything physical after everything she’s been through. Apparently, I’m wrong because she’s pressing against me seductively and fuck does she feel good.

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