Page 41 of Begin Again

Chapter 11

I licked the salt on my wrist, tipped my chin up, downed the shot of tequila, then bit into a lemon slice.Snakebite.

I couldn’t say how many times I’d repeated this ritual tonight. I could hold my liquor, and it usually took a while before it showed any effect. But now the walls were spinning. And I felt fabulous.

“How does she do it?” Scott asked, looking across me to Dawn. I was sitting between them at the bar in Hillhouse.

“No idea. Her liver must be made of steel,” my friend responded.A liver of steel. I snorted. I must have gotten it from my mother. After all, she had a heart of steel.

I paused. If I could still think that clearly, I definitely needed another shot. I leaned over the bar and waved my hand. Within seconds the next glass was in front of me, and I raised it in thanks to the bartender. Thank God for their lax attention to age.

“I want to dance,” I called out to Dawn and Scott after I’d tossed down the shot. I dragged them to the dance floor and began to move to the music. I was drunk and surrounded by friends. I’d feel better soon. At least so I told myself.

After a while, Scott went off with a guy who seemed familiar, someone who was taking a course with me. Dawn and I joined a bunch of students, dancing with abandon. It was already after midnight when they asked us if we wanted to join them at a house party with other friends. We quickly agreed.

Dawn had taken it a bit easier this night and did her best to make sure I got safely to our goal.

Students were staggering around with red Solo cups in their hands in front of the entrance, and a sweetish smell floated in the air, hinting that not only cigarettes were being smoked.

Our new friends introduced us to the host and then disappeared amid the swirling crowd. Music thundered from the speakers, so I dragged Dawn toward the makeshift dance floor at the other end of the room. I had to keep on dancing.

“I’ve never seen you here before,” a guy addressed me as we got closer. Right away, his friend started chatting with Dawn.

“I’m a freshman,” I said, smiling, and moved to the music.

“Want a drink?”

I looked at him. He had beautiful green eyes and sandy hair, just a tad too long. As if he could read my mind, he shook his bangs off his forehead.

I grinned. “Sure.” I said with a shrug, following him to a table crowded with bottles of beer and other mysterious liquors.

“What’s your name?” asked the guy, handing me a cup filled with red liquid. I sniffed it and wrinkled my nose. Actually, I didn’t like sweet mixed drinks. But I’d make an exception today.

“I’m Allie. And you?”

“Brix.” He knocked his cup against mine. “Cheers to being a freshman.”

We chatted a while, until he introduced me to a few more people. I laughed aloud at the jokes that Brix’s friends made, and I soon noticed that a pleasant warmth had spread through my body. No idea what was in this drink, but it seemed to have an effect. And as long as I could keep that emptiness at bay, it was okay with me.

Brix and I went off to dance. He moved his hands up and down my body. It wasn’t strange or frightening. It felt good to let go.

I didn’t know how we reached that point, but I started dancing on a table with another girl, one of Brix’s friends. She took my hand and we swayed together to the music.

From the corner of my eye I saw Dawn talking on her phone near the entrance. She didn’t notice me waving her over to us.

I closed my eyes and concentrated on the music. This was exactly what I needed today. I needed to be here, not in my room, where my mother’s words still hung over me like a poisonous cloud.

When I reopened my eyes, I saw a familiar face below me in the crowd. With his set jaw and sparkling eyes, his tousled hair and three-day beard, he looked damn fine—but also incredibly dangerous.

“Roommate!” I squealed and leapt from the table, which was a pretty major feat in my high heels. I landed right in his arms.

“What are you doing?” he asked.

I chuckled. “Dancing.”

“Yeah, I saw that.” Kaden removed my arm from his neck. His tense expression brought me down from my high.

I heard a few people laugh. I turned to them and Brix was grinning broadly at me. I waved back.

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