Page 82 of Begin Again

“Russell Anderson. An old friend of the family,” Anderson interrupted, and nodded to Kaden instead of shaking hands.

Kaden tensed beside me, drawing me a bit closer to give me support, without knowing who this man was let alone what his presence triggered in me.

Just then the loudspeakers crackled with the sound of my mother’s voice. She talked about the organization that would get this year’s donations, and how much this meant to her.

But my eyes were still on Anderson. How could he have the impudence to appear here? To talk to me, touch me? In my parents’ house!

How could they even let him in, after everything he’d done to me?

“And I’m especially pleased,” my mother continued in her cheery speech voice, “that I have the honor of recognizing a remarkable person today. Not only has he supported the foundation through his commitment—he’s also been a friend of the family for a long time.” She paused for effect. “Ladies and gentlemen, please give a hand to this year’s top donor… you already know him! Russell—where are you hiding?”

My mouth dropped open.

Anderson turned toward me and winked. He let his hand drift across my hip as he whispered, “Nice to see you again, Crystal. Maybe we can free up some time for each other later on.”

Then he turned, straightened his tie, and, smiling brightly, made his way through the throng of guests to join my mother at the podium.

My legs were about to give way; I reached for Kaden’s arm.

“Get me out of here,” I gasped. “Please, get me out of here!”

Kaden shifted gears, put his arm around me and pushed me firmly toward the front door. Anderson’s oily slick voice followed us the whole way. He felt honored, and he would accept the recognition in the name of all those in need…

My stomach cramped. Once outside, I inhaled the fresh air as if I’d been drowning. Kaden led me across the driveway and away from the property, ignoring the dismayed looks of other guests.

Once we’d reached the street, he relaxed his hold, and I let myself sink onto the sidewalk. Kaden spoke, but all I could hear was Anderson’s voice swirling around in my head.Crystal.How he’d whispered my name.

My pulse was racing. This was the last straw.

Kaden’s face appeared before mine. He knelt in front of me and touched my knees. I pushed his hands away.

“What did that asshole do to you?” he whispered.

I couldn’t speak. He put his big hands around my face, but instead of making me feel safer, this just made me feel afraid. I resisted him.

“Allie, you have to tell me,” Kaden insisted. “Did he… Did he hurt you?” He said the words as if it pained him to pronounce them aloud.

I knew what he was asking, and shook my head no.

“I don’t believe you.”

I forced myself to look at Kaden. His gaze was pleading, almost panicky.

“He did not go to bed with me,” was all I could muster before standing and looking for a taxi. The walls I’d built around my soul back then had now returned. And they stopped me from telling the true story.

It wasn’t long before a taxi appeared. Kaden helped me get in and told the driver to wait a moment. He disappeared, returning a few minutes later with our jackets. He put mine over my shoulders and laid his own over my legs. The farther away we were from my parents’ house, the easier it was for me to breathe. But I still couldn’t bear Kaden’s touch. Not now. It was too much, just too much.

Back in the hotel, I disappeared into the bathroom and turned on the shower. I used an entire bottle of shower gel, but no matter how hard I tried, the terrible memories of Russell Anderson wouldn’t wash away. Afterward, the whole bathroom was filled with mist. With a trembling hand, I wiped a patch of steam off the mirror and stared at myself.

Pale face. Panic-stricken eyes. The look was oh-so-familiar. For months, I’d stared back at that broken girl in the mirror.

I tried not to hyperventilate.

Running into Russell Anderson was the last thing I’d been expecting today. Our last contact was nearly three years back.

I wrapped myself in the bathrobe, brushed my teeth, and then pulled on my leggings and a wide black T-shirt. As I blow-dried my hair, I realized I had calmed down.

“Allie?” Kaden was standing outside the door.

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