Page 57 of Save Me

“True,” I mumble, sticking an annoyingly tickly strand of hair back behind my ear. “Alistair. If it had been up to you, I wouldn’t be here now.”

“It’s not that.”

“What then?” I have no idea why the idea that he didn’t want me here bothers me so much.

“You just don’t belong here, Ruby.”

It feels like he’s stabbed me. With a sharp little knife or something. It’s a huge effort not to let the pain show.

“I…I didn’t mean it like that,” he says at once. Apparently, I didn’t do such a good job of not showing the pain as I thought.

“Right.” I turn away and look through the huge windows to the pool, which someone just jumped into fully dressed. A few seconds later, James pushes his way in front of me, filling my whole vision.

“Hey, come on. I only meant that I get a bad feeling about you being around certain people. They’ll end up messing with you. I feel responsible for you.”

“I’m quite capable of looking after myself, thank you very much,” I snap back.

He gives me another piercing look, and I take a tiny sip of my Coke so as to break eye contact. Him looking at me like that makes me hot, and it’s warm enough in here already.

“I don’t want to be a drag. Just act the way you normally do,” I say in the end, with a wave of my hand to take in the entire room. Let James get up to whatever it is he usually does at these parties. I don’t want him acting like my babysitter.

He nods and downs his second drink. Then he takes my glass and puts it next to his on a little side table. The next moment, he’s taken my hand. He pulls me back into the middle of the room, right in the heart of the dancing crowd. My heart hammers wildly, and I wonder what the hell he’s up to as he pulls me closer. His chest touches mine and he squeezes my hand, then lets go and starts to move to the music.

James Beaufort is dancing with me. He smiles down at me and circles his hips.

“What are you doing?” I ask in confusion. I’m the only person standing stock-still on the dance floor.

“I’m doing what I normally do at parties,” James replies.

Yet again, the look in his eyes seems like a dare that I have to accept. I try to copy his movements. Someone crashes into me from behind and I stumble against him, so he puts a hand on my waist to stop me falling. My throat goes dry and my heart beats faster. An intense heat floods through me as I look up at him again. We’re pressed together so tight that not even a sheet of paper would fit between us.

Next to us, someone cheers. I tear my eyes off James’s face and look around. At least five pairs of eyes are fixed on us.

I must be out of my mind. James and I might be living in friendly coexistence now, but this is something else entirely. And if I don’t want stories about us going around the school like wildfire, I urgently need to get off this dance floor.

“I need the loo,” I gasp. James pulls back right away. His eyes glitter knowingly, and at this moment, I’m too confused to understand what that means. He nods to the left-hand corner of the room, where an archway leads out to a corridor. “First right, second door on the left.”

I slip between the dancing bodies and then walk down the hall. There are oil paintings of the Vega family on the wall, and the wallpaper shimmers green and gold in the lamplight. The carpet beneath my feet is dark red with an intricate pattern of abstract shapes that somehow resemble animals. I turn right as James said. This part of the hallway is empty, and I lean against the wall for a moment.

I really do not have a clue what I’m doing here. Quite apart from the fact that I feel totally out of place, James unsettles me. The way he touches me, looks at me, his whispered words—if I didn’t know better, I’d say he was flirting with me.

On Monday, when he stood at my front door and said he didn’t want to go back to the old days, I didn’t expect us to end up here. Does he dance like that with everyone he knows? Probably.

Maybe I should just see it as a task to complete. I’m at school with these people, whether I like it or not. And if I make it to Oxford, I might have to deal with some of them, and there’ll certainly be plenty of other rich kids.

I take a deep breath, clench my fists, and push myself firmly away from the wall. I’ll freshen up and then I’ll go back into that sitting room, drink up my Coke, and dance with James. What can go wrong? People are going to talk about me anyway now, and that way, at least I can have a bit of fun.

Having made up my mind, I walk to the door a few feet further down the hall and open it, expecting to find a bathroom. It’s dark apart from the light shining in from the hallway. My eyes take a moment to adjust, but then I make out the outline of an antique desk, a collection of plush chairs, and…loads of bookcases.

This is definitely not the bathroom—this is a library! After a tiny hesitation, I step curiously inside and look around. Just the first bookcase contains more books than our entire house. A smile spreads over my face, and I venture another step…and then I hear it.

Heavy breathing. And muffled sighs.

Turn and leave, a voice is crying in my head, but it’s too late. My eyes rest on Alistair, who’s standing with his back to another bookcase, further into the room. His head is thrown back, and at that second, he groans loudly.

I hear a quiet smacking sound. “If you keep making that much noise, I’ll stop.”

I freeze. I know that voice. It’s hushed and deep, a little smoky.

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