Page 75 of Save Me

Will he notice how little our worlds fit together?

I’ve enjoyed these last few weeks so much, and I don’t want to lose him. But I’m afraid I have no claim on him. We both know which world he’ll choose in the end.

The pressure on my chest is growing more and more. Maybe it would be easier if I make the decision for him, before he gets the chance to hurt me.

“So this is our last job on the team together,” I say, looking him straight in the eye. My heart is pounding wildly. If he comes closer, I’m sure he’ll hear it.

“True,” James replies quietly.

For a while, we just look at each other. Then we both breathe in as if to say something, but pause. The air between us is crackling, and my pulse is racing so fast that I can’t bear it a second longer. I do the first thing that comes into my head. I hold out my hand to James.

“It’s been really nice working with you,” I say, as formally as possible.

At first, James looks surprised. Then his turquoise eyes fill with an emotion I’ve seen before but couldn’t place. Now I know what it is: yearning.

He takes my hand and holds it gently but firmly. “That sounds as though you’re saying goodbye to me.”

At the moment I hear those words, I understand that he’s right. And yet I realize that it’s the last thing I want. I don’t want to say goodbye to him. I want to hold on to the chance to talk to James. To tell him more about me and to listen when he confides in me.

I want to know everything about you.

The thought overwhelms me suddenly, and the same yearning I can see in his eyes fills my stomach. It’s burning hot, downright desperate, flows through my veins, and makes my fingers grip his more tightly. I don’t know what’s happening, but…my knees feel weak, and his hand is so warm in mine. I wonder what it would feel like on other parts of my body. I want more than just this touch. More ofhim.

“James…”

“Yes,” he murmurs again. He sounds just as confused, as breathless as me.

The next second, he pulls me so that I fall into him.

He looks me in the eyes for a split second. Then he takes the back of my neck in his hand and holds it fast.

The next moment, he presses his lips onto mine.

I can’t think. My head switches off, there are no more rational thoughts, only the glowing heat flooding my body. I wrap both arms around his neck and bury my hands in his hair. He starts to move his mouth against mine.

James kisses the way he moves and acts: proud and self-assured. He knows exactly what to do, knows exactly how to touch me to fan the heat into flames. He presses his tongue into my mouth without hesitation and without any shyness and plays with mine until I feel like my knees might give way any moment. But even if they did, he’d be there to catch me. His arm is tight around me, and he’s holding me close. I can feel his body through the weighty fabric of my dress, but it’s not enough. I need more.

I groan quietly and let my hands slide to his shoulders, then back to his throat and the front of his collar. His skin is warm and velvety, and everything within me shouts more, more,more.

I want more of him. To undress him, here on this staircase, in the middle of the school. I wouldn’t care if anyone came along and caught us. All that matters to me is James, his mouth on my lips, my jaw, my throat. He takes my skin between his teeth, pinches slightly, but I wish he’d bite harder. I want him to leave marks on my body, so that in a few hours I’ll be able to see that this really happened, that it wasn’t my imagination.

“Ruby…” I thought I knew every color of his voice. But this is new. That’s what he sounds like once he’s kissed me out of my mind. He takes my face and looks at me. His thumbs run over my cheeks. My jaw. My lips. My cheeks again. “Ruby.”

I lean forward and lay my mouth on his. A painful ache tugs at my belly and works its way up until it’s hard to breathe. Now I understand why he keeps whispering my name. I want to do the same. James,James.Always James.

“James.” A commanding voice speaks above us.

We spring apart. I step on the hem of my skirt and lose my balance, but James reaches out and grabs my waist. He waits until I’m holding safely onto the banister again. Then he lets go of me at once and looks up. I follow his gaze.

Mortimer Beaufort is standing at the top of the stairs, hands linked behind his back, watching us with dark eyes. My heart pounds.

“Your mother is looking for you.”

James stretches his back and nods briefly. “I’ll be there in a minute.”

Mr. Beaufort raises an eyebrow slightly. “She wants you now, not in a minute.”

James stiffens. I hold out my hand and gently stroke his arm in the hope that his father can’t see us. James takes my hand in hisand looks at our intertwined fingers. I hear him sigh quietly. Then he lifts my hand to his lips and presses a soft kiss onto it.

---