Page 84 of Behind Frenemy Lines

Always had the thought at the back of my head that I might go back. Never been able to bring myself to commit to it before, though I knew Ma would like me to live closer by. But then, I’d be closer to Ba as well, with all the complications that entailed.

Not that I managed to avoid his complications, despite living so far away. He wasn’t a reason for avoiding going back. I’d just never had a good enough reason to subject myself to the necessary faff—leaving the firm, finding a new job, selling or renting out the flat, sorting out accommodation over there.

Kriya: “Yeah. But I’m not from here, that makes a difference. I kind of chose to stay for Tom, originally. And the job. Now I don’t have either. And in Hong Kong, I’d be closer to my parents.”

She shook herself, glancing at her computer screen. “I’ll have to think about it another time. Got to go see HR now.” She grimaced. “Wish me luck.”

CG: “Are you all right going by yourself? Would you like company?”

Kriya looked surprised, as though she hadn’t considered before that she didn’t need to do it on her own. “Are you offering?”

I had a client meeting in ten minutes, but I could move it. Good for clients to learn they can’t have it their own way all the time. “Yes.”

Kriya: “That would be helpful. Yeah. Thanks, Charles.”

Kriya left the office after the meeting with HR. It was four p.m., but nobody was likely to object. She looked exhausted, and it wasn’t like it mattered anymore if she met her billable hour targets.

HR meeting went all right. I didn’t say much: only spoke when called upon, to corroborate Kriya’s account. Emily had agreed to speak to HR as well about her experience.

The HR people seemed to take it seriously. Apart from anything else, Arthur hadn’t been at the firm long enough to establish himself. Presumably he wouldn’t be that difficult to get rid of. If anything, they seemed more concerned about Kriya’s departure—devoted a good ten minutes to telling her she shouldn’t feel she had to leave the firm. They couldn’t promise any outcomes until they’d completed their investigation, but if there was anything they could do to make the firm a safe environment, etc., etc.

Kriya had nodded, smiled a little, and maintained her desire to resign. Seemed more distracted than anything else. As though she was already mentally in a future where she was gone, and none of this was her concern any longer.

We met for dinner, as Kriya had proposed, at a restaurant near her flat, after I got out of the office. But she was as abstracted at dinner. Had the sense she regretted suggesting it.

To be fair, she had a lot to think about. Like moving to Hong Kong for a job with her favourite client.

The weekend felt very far away now. Was deeply regretting notasking Kriya what she thought was going on between us, while it was happening. If she’d said all the sex and self-revealing conversations didn’t mean anything—that they were nothing more than a fevered one-off, a brief break from reality—it would have hurt, but at least I would have known where I stood.

If she’d said, conversely,What do you mean what does it all mean, aren’t we together now?then that would have been a place to start from. I’d have a right to ask her now what was going to happen to us. I’d have a right to assume therewasan us.

As it was, I didn’t know how to raise it. Seemed trivial, next to everything else Kriya had to think about.

We didn’t talk about Arthur, or what we meant to each other (if anything), or whether Kriya thought I was a gutless loser, happy to represent any fraudulent scoundrel so long as they were willing to pay up. Dinner conversation focused on lighter topics:

“I’ll need to dig up that list of food recommendations you gave me, if I go to Hong Kong,” Kriya said.

CG: “Where is the Sanson office?”

When she told me, I started listing more places she could go to, but Kriya stopped me: “Email them to me. Actually, can you WhatsApp me? I’ll give you my number.”

Weird that I’d been inside her, but this was the first time I was getting her personal number. Felt close to Kriya, but I wasn’t, not really. Barely knew her.

Kriya leaned across the table to save her number on my phone. I caught a whiff of her hair. Brought back the morning with painful vividness: waking up with her scent in my nostrils, her warmth next to me.

Actually felt faint with desire. Never happened to me before.

Walked back to Kriya’s flat with her, so I could pick up my things. I was planning to take the Tube to the hotel I’d booked.

Kriya: “Travelodge?”

CG: “Premier Inn. None of the rooms have windows, but the pictures on the website look fine.”

Kriya made a face. “At least you get natural light in the office.” Paused. “I’m going to work from home for the rest of the week, so I might not see you in the office again. I’ll just come in next Monday to drop my laptop off with IT.”

CG: “Right.”

Hadn’t been emotionally prepared for this. Hadn’t been emotionally prepared for anything that had happened in the past four days, up to and including Kriya inviting me to stay at her flat.

---