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I’m in a blur of panic and shock, so I can’t focus on anything but pulling the trigger again and again.

I don’t really think I hit anyone, but maybe my firing still helps.

Burgundy is hurt. She’s still lying where Logan dropped her in the underbrush of the woods. But she’s alive. And in pain. She’s twisting uncomfortably and whimpering occasionally.

I really can’t believe this is happening. It’s hardly fair that we get hit with this ambush immediately following the news we heard in the town.

I’m honestly not sure how we manage it, but the attackers drop one by one. Both Logan and Deck are better than most with their rifles, and the trees provide a stronger defense than we deserve given the fact that we were taken so unawares.

When the shooting finally stops, Logan and Deck come out from behind the trees to check things out and kill the men on the ground who are only injured.

Still holding my gun at the ready, I follow them onto the road in case they need any backup.

But it seems safe enough.

Maybe we’re okay as long as Burgundy isn’t seriously injured.

I’m about to turn around to check on her when I see a motion from the pickup down the road. There’s someone still alive back there, and they’re aiming right at Deck.

I shoot without thinking it through, hitting the smallish man in the shoulder. He falls, dropping his rifle in the process.

Deck and Logan hurry over. Deck shoots the man in the head. Logan glances back at me.

“I know,” I say, my voice raw as if I haven’t used it in days. “I should have shot him in the head or the chest. Iknow.”

Logan doesn’t look angry or give me a lecture. He simply shakes his head. “Okay, Bilbo. We got lucky today, but luck isn’t always on our side. If you don’t shoot to kill, you won’t live long enough to regret it.”

“I know.”

I do know, but I’m more relieved than anything else as Deck and I go back to see about Burgundy.

Deck gives me a questioning look as we walk. He spells out,Bilbo?

“Yeah. That was a joke I made. Because I’m prettymuch useless but can sneak around and not get seen. Logan thought it was funny.”

I can see this process on Deck’s face.You’re not useless.

“Well, thank you for that. But I do need to get a little tougher. Logan is right. In a different situation, not killing someone when I can would be a big mistake. I need to do better. I need to… change.” We’re almost to Burgundy, and I’m deeply relieved to see her sitting up. It looks like she’s mostly okay.

Deck scowls at me.You read Bilbo books.

I blink. “What? Yes, I read the books. Why?”

He has to spell out a few words because we’ve never learned them.Bilbo’s mercy saved everyone.He gives me a stern look.You don’t need to change.

22

We spendthe evening in the campground.

I fit myself into my sleeping bag like normal, settling not far from Micah and Burgundy. Deck is standing guard, but I leave a space for him to sleep beside me when he’s finished with his shift.

I’m always so tired in the evenings I fall asleep without any trouble, but tonight I wake up in the middle of the night. Wide-awake for no reason with a heaviness in my gut I can’t quite identify.

The large campfire has died down quite a bit, but it’s still crackling softly in the middle of the clearing, casting flickering light over the sleeping bodies stretched out on the ground surrounding it.

I have no idea what time it is, but a light touch on my shoulder makes me jerk in surprise. I turn over to see that Deck is lying beside me, so obviously it’s late enough for his guard shift to be over.

I smile at him in the faint light, and he smiles back.

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