Page 55 of Shadows of Stardust

Measured. Calm. Collected.

It’ll only hurt the situation more if I can’t make this insufferable, unreasonable human understand.

“Yes, opportunity. Just because you’re incapable of seeing it that way doesn’t make it any less of one.”

She crosses her arms over her chest. “Just becauseyou’reincapable of seeing what an ass you’re being doesn’t make you any less of one.”

Another notch, slipped. Another bright flare of the temper I’ve tried to keep buried.

“I’man ass?” The expression of comparing someone to hindquarters isn’t one that exists in the Revexoran language, but her meaning is more than clear. “I was only doing my job, making sure contestants like you follow the show’s rules and—”

“Oh, sure. And just because you’re following the rules automatically makes what you’re doing moral? Makes it right?”

A growl lodges in my throat. She’s not wrong, but…

“Of course it’s not that simple. And I’m not. YouknowI’m not. As soon as I decided to help you, I put everything I’m doing here at risk.”

“Help me? You think you’re helping me?”

Obstinate, frustrating human. Why can’t she see?

“Yes. I’m helping you. Would you rather I have turned you in that night and let you face the consequences? Would you rather I have let you go traipsing off into the Eritin wilderness and earn yourself charges from the Seventh Sector Council for unauthorized—”

“I would have rather you left me the fuck alone! From the beginning. From whenever you decided to be such a bastard andstart following me, making me some kind of deranged little pet project like—”

“Roslyn.” I can’t keep the desperation from my voice. “Please.”

Whether it’s the word or the tone, something about the plea seems to resonate with her. At least enough for her to fall silent and meet my gaze, waiting for me to continue.

“Whatever it is you’re after,” I say, fighting to regain my composure, “let me help. I know you don’t want to trust me. I know you think you have no reason to trust me, and I don’t blame you. But hear me when I say there is nothing in this universe I want more than to regain my position with the Aux. Whatever it takes.”

Her silence continues, stretching out between us like a terrible, palpable thing.

With each passing second of it, I can feel the impasse looming.

Whatever she says next will determine where we go from here.

I don’t want to turn her in, don’t want to report what I’ve seen and done to the Mate Match security team, but nor can I let this continue. Not when it means jeopardizing the scant progress I’ve made in clawing my way back up the ranks. Not when it means risking the life I’ve worked decades for and my plans to dismantle the Aux’s abhorrent recruiting practices.

As much as I want to shield Roslyn, to be her partner here, I won’t abandon my plans for her sake.

I can’t.

But she still hasn’t said anything.

The silence between us grows heavier, more absolute, and in it, her answer becomes clear.

She’s not going to trust me.

And fine. That’s her prerogative.

If she ignores all that I’ve risked to show her it’s in her best interest—in both our best interests—to work together in this, that’s up to her.

But curse my own foolish, obstinate heart, because I can’t help but give it one last try.

“What more can I do to prove it to you? I’ve kept your behavior a secret. I’ve kept the cameras off you, protected you, put my own aims here at risk.”

Something flashes in Roslyn’s eyes, a crease appears between her brows, but I can’t read her. I can’t tell if that expression contains doubt or hesitation or just more of her unshakable resolve that I’m nothing but a danger to her, nothing but a hindrance.

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