She never said. I remember only that she argued with the emperor the day it was announced that Lan had sent you as a ward, and she disappeared not long before you arrived at the capital.
I looked over at Yexue. “What if she ran away because of you?”
“Don’t blame me. I have never met her,” Yexue replied. “And Pinghas said that she ran away because of theemperor.Read carefully, Fei. Weren’t you taught by the best scholars Rong had to offer?”
“The scholars were always too focused on Siwang to pay me any attention,” I shot back. “Ping, can you read the stars like your teacher?” If Yexue and I couldn’t find the stargazer to decipher our fates, maybe Ping could help?
I can, but losing my eyes has made that difficult. Peizhi helps me. He describes them, and has built a table of moving blocks that follow the pattern of the stars through these tiny dots. But it is not the same. Even if I figure out a way to read the stars as I did, I was only ever a disciple. If you want real answers, you will need to find my teacher.
“I’m trying to find her, but she has left us almost no trace to follow.” I glanced at Yexue. “Did the prophecy ever say anything about what would happen if I don’t marry anyone?”
Ping shrugged.The continent continues to fight?
“And if I don’t find my true love?”
Ping pursed her lips. Again, she wrote:The continent continues to fight?
“And if I marry the wrong man?”
She giggled before she wrote again:The continent continues to fight?
Surprisingly, I giggled, too. “What if I just married every warlord on the continent?”
“Then I will have to kill everyone and become the last warlord standing,” Yexue put in.
He’s persistent,Ping wrote. Then:Peizhi told me that Prince Yexue likes you.
“Likes me or my prophecy?”
She shrugged.I would love to look into it for you. Perhaps one day,when I relearn my abilities without having to see the stars with my own eyes. In the meantime, why don’t you try to see the future for yourself?Ping smiled and touched the spot between her brows.
I was struck by a sudden coldness. “Who else knows?”
Teacher told only me. She specifically instructed that the emperor could not know about your abilities.
I could not imagine what would have happened if the emperor had learned that I possessed the magic of Fate, and that I could see the future, even if it was brief glimpses. “Thank you.”
I never told anyone about your gift,Ping added.But I did confirm it to Yexue when he guessed it.
“Nothing is going to happen to you under my watch, Fei,” said Yexue. “You don’t have to worry.”
But I don’t want to live my life under your protection.That familiar hunger crept back in, though this time not for Yexue’s lips or his skin, but for his power and his status. There had to be more ways for girls to obtain power in this world than through marriage.
I didn’t want to be the water that reflected his light. I wanted to be the light itself.
The prophecy said I was the one destined for greatness, not my lover and not my husband.Me.
And what would happen if I killed the love of my life?I bit my tongue. “What else do you know about my magic and why it stems from the mark?”
Your magic is an extension of you, but you are not your magic,Ping wrote.I wish I could answer your questions about your prophecy and your phoenix’s mark. However, the will of the gods is not for mortals to know. All we can do is guess and steal glimpses from the stars. Or in your case, steal from Fate herself.
49
We stayed for breakfast, which was a bowl of hearty egg drop soup and a basket of beef-topped scallion pancakes, and fried dough. We sat in the sort of grand hall I was too familiar with, for I had sat in too many of these for too many feasts. High ceilings and sleek red beams, two rows of low tables carved from a cherry-scented wood. Yexue sat at the head of the hall, with Peizhi at his right hand. I sat at Yexue’s left, and Ping had originally moved toward the table next to Peizhi before I gently touched her hand and asked, “Can you sit next tome? I have more questions to ask.”
Ping had hesitated for a moment before obliging.
I’d hoped that Yexue and Peizhi would walk off and discuss military matters too important for my eager ears, so that Ping and I could get a moment of privacy.