At least she hasn’t asked me about Dad.
No sooner than the thought crosses my mind does Mom come up beside me. I can feel the heat of her dark gaze boring into my back while I set to work and fry us a couple of eggs.
I keep quiet as I pull out the skillet and wait for it to heat, then add the butter, wondering who will break the ice first when she finally asks, “So is it true?”
The air leaves my lungs like the wind leaving the sails of a boat, and when I don’t immediately respond, she adds, “It’s true, isn’t it? Your father has another woman, but it’s serious this time.”
“Yes,” I answer slowly, turning to face her, knowing there’s no way I can sugarcoat this. She’ll discover the truth one way or the other.
Mom nods, her face a somber mask.
“Why don’t we have a seat at the table and eat some breakfast,” I say, trying to sound more chipper than I feel. “I found these beautiful apple cinnamon muffins.” I grab them from the bag onthe counter and hold them out. “Here, take these while I finish the eggs, and you can top your coffee off.”
I watch as Mom stares blankly at the muffins, then takes them and heads for the small dining room table just off the kitchen. She settles into her chair while I inhale a deep breath, preparing myself for what I’m about to tell her.
I plate the eggs, then take them to the table, serving us each a muffin before I settle into a chair across from her.
Mom nibbles on the crumble topping, anxiety emanating from her pores like bad whiskey.
Lifting my mug to my lips, I take a sip, soaking in the warmth of it as I try to find the courage to speak. I’m surprised when my mother’s the first to break the silence. “So, how’s school?”
I blink, shocked she’s asking about me and not my father.
I bite my lower lip to hide a smile, afraid to hope all is not lost. “It’s good. I’ve made some wonderful girlfriends, and my classes are going well.”
“That’s great.” Mom nods. “You don’t take my calls, so I wasn’t sure.”
Guilt clogs my throat, forcing me to clear it before I say, “Sorry. I’ve just been really busy trying to juggle everything.”
“I get it. You have your own life. I’m sure everything is new and exciting.” Mom smiles. “The last thing I want to do is drag you down.”
“Mom, it’s not like that.”
It’s exactly like that.
“How’s your job at the law firm?” I ask, deciding to change the subject.
“Oh, you know.” She waves me off. “Just filing paperwork and running errands. Busy work. Nothing exciting.”
“But you like it well enough?” I ask, unable to get a read on her answer and hoping she’s not purposely being evasive because she’s quit or been fired.
“Yes, Charlotte, I like it well enough. It’s a job,” she says with a huff. “I don’t have some fancy degree, so it’s about as good as it’s going to get for me, but Dr. Sherri says working is good for me, so . . .”
Dr. Sherri is Mom’s therapist.
Dr. Sherri deserves a freaking award for the progress she’s made.
“Well, you’ve been there almost a year now, so I’m happy to hear it.” I pick at my muffin, taking a small bite as I consider this conversation. I wasn’t sure at first, but it really does feel like Mom is still doing well. I’d like to say I’m not surprised, but the truth is, I’m shocked. I expected her to fall to pieces after I left for school, and not because I’m a narcissist who thinks I matter that much, but because her past behavior has given me no reason to think otherwise.
“You know,” I say, deciding to put myself out there. “I can get you a ticket to an AAU game sometime, if you want. We could go together. One of my best friend’s boyfriend plays, so we’re basically at every game.”
“Oh, uh . . .” Mom scrunches her nose. “I don’t know. I’m not much into football.”
I nod. “Right.” It was worth a shot.
“How’s Carol’s youngest son? I know the last time I saw her she was worried he might not graduate.”
“They let him take a summer class, so he could graduate on time. He’s actually going to a trade school by his brothers in Florida for welding now.”