Page 75 of Storm in a D Cup

‘Paul told me that Genie Stacie secretly hired him to organize an engagement party for her and her mysterious sports celebrity who lives between Boston and Italy…’

His face reddened. ‘And you think it’s me? You think I would actually do something like that to you? What the hell iswrongwith you, Erica! What does that even say about our relationship?’ he shouted. Really shouted.

‘What was I supposed to think?’ I shouted back. At least we were communicating again. ‘She’s always all over you and you haven’t been really speaking to me since we got back from the castle—’

‘Where I almostdied,’ he underlined.

‘But I didn’t do it on purpose,’ I assured him. ‘I just wanted to put someoomphback into our relationship, but you completely blocked me out!’

‘It wasn’t about you, Erica! Just because I don’t want to have sex doesn’t mean I don’t love you anymore. I just had a lot on my mind.’

‘What? So you’re not in love with her?’

‘How could you even think something like that of me? For Christ’s sake, Erica!’

I didn’t know what to think anymore. Half of me was relieved that he had nothing to do with the engagement party, and half of me was sick to the back of my teeth about this whole situation.

‘And Joey! How can you possibly think that this isn’t going to change our family?’ I blurted out as I sank into a chair.

‘I know this is tough on you,’ Julian said, squatting before me. Tough didn’t even begin to describe it. ‘But it happened many years ago. It’s not like I cheated on you.’

He hadn’t cheated on me because it had happened way before me. I knew that, of course. But inside me there would always be that niggling doubt. If she hadn’t left him for Tom Jackson, would they still be together today? And how can you blame someone for a fling they had way before they even met you? Julian was not at fault if Genie Stacie had passed her child off as Tom Jackson’s all these years.

But he would forgive her because, one, Julian was a forgiver by nature, and two, Genie Stacie had made him a happy man by giving him exactly what I’d been desperately trying to do for months now without any success. At this point it wouldn’t matter to Julian anymore if I got pregnant or not. Now he had Joey. I felt used, like my body had disappointed him, but it didn’t matter because now he had a daughter of his own blood. Tears stabbed at the back of my eyes, threatening to spill, and my mouth was filled with the all too familiar saline flavor of unhappiness.

‘Honey… this doesn’t change anything between us,’ Julian whispered. ‘You and I are rock solid – you know that…’

Did I? How could I be so sure, especially now that Genie Stacie was here to stay? If it wasn’t today, it could very well be tomorrow. She knew no limits or boundaries.

‘But that’s just it, Julian. This changes everything.’

‘No, don’t say that. We will continue to be happy together, no matter what fate throws our way.’

Happy? Happy? I couldn’t remember the last time I’d laughed since Genie Stacie had landed on our home like a bomb. Like the plague.

‘Erica? Will you stand by me?’ Julian raked his hand through his hair. ‘If Joey really is my daughter, I don’t want to screw this up. I need you, Erica.’

I wiped my eyes. ‘I needed you, too. But look what you’ve done to us.’

His jaw dropped as he stared at me, utterly surprised.

Of course he was surprised. What did he know about the endless nights of worrying that she would, in the end, take him away from me? It was taking its toll on my health. I had had countless sleepless nights because of this, and I was beginning to feel queasy and sick to my stomach whenever I just thought about her, let alone saw her in my home.

I sighed an exhausted sigh. ‘I know it’s not your fault, Julian, but I don’t know if things can ever be the same again between us. I know I should be happy that you’re not running off and getting engaged to Genie Stacie and all, but believe me… this whole thing…’ I lifted my hands, helpless ‘…her mere presence… it’s truly soured me to the point that I’m sick to the back of my teeth.’

‘So what are you saying?’

‘I’m saying that I can’t just continue like nothing happened. I’m sorry, maybe a greater woman would, but I’m finding it extremely difficult to cope.’

He ran a hand through his dark hair. ‘Jesus, Erica, after all these years together, you’re doing this to me? I need you by my side. You’re mywife…’

‘I’m sorry I feel this way,’ I finally sobbed, dashing a hand across my eyes. ‘I can’t just lie and pretend it’s all OK.It hurts too much…’

‘But Erica, I did absolutely nothing wrong…’

‘I’ll help you with Joey, of course. It’s not her fault. I can get her back into shape in no time. And I’ll do everything I can to make things like they were in this family. But I honestly don’t think it’s enough to put you and me back to where we were. I’m sorry.’ And then I began to really, really sob as the monumentality of what I was saying began to sink in.

‘Jesus Christ, Erica, I’m doing my damnedest here – what more do you want from me?’ he said hotly, his face red, his eyes flashing daggers at me.

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