I grab her jaw and force her eyes open with my free hand.
“Look at me. Open your fucking eyes.”
Nothing.
I release her, turning to her nightstand. I pick it up and throw it across the room as rage blinds me. What the fuck have I done to her? She wants to die. I fucking failed her. I turn back to her.
“You want to die?” I speak coldly. “You want to leave me like this?”
My fingers tremble as I pull her upright, cradling her against my chest as if she were made of glass.
“You don’t get to say goodbye,” I whisper against her forehead.
“Not to me.”
I slide my phone out of my pocket and call 911.
“I’ll fix this. I’ll fucking fix this.”
I press my lips to her temple.
“You don’t get to leave me. Not until I let you go…. And I never will.”
* * *
33
Evelyn
I’m weightless.
The wind rushes past my ears, tugging my hair as the clear blue sky stretches above. My arms flailed once, then stilled. I’m not scared. I’m numb.
I feel nothing— only peace.
I stand at the edge of a cliff, curling my toes over the jagged rocks. I stare down at the rocky water below. I take a deep breath and feel my heart slow.
The water calls my name, urging me to let go. I do.
I fall.
I feel the weight of gravity pushing me down towards the rocks. I close my eyes, ready for the pain.
Except— there is no pain. I’m met with softness—a warmth against my skin like sun-kissed silk. I open my eyes.
I’m not dead. I’m lying in a field of sunflowers. Tall golden stalks surround me, all facing the light as if they worship the sun. It smells of honey and earth. A breeze dances around us, and the petals lift.
Everything glows.
I curl my fingers into the soil below me. It’s real. I’m safe. Maybe this is heaven—if it’s not, it’s just as close.
I sense a shift in the air. A chill flows through the air. Not the kind of chill that instills fear—no. It’s the kind of chill that flutters deep inside your stomach.
I turn my head and I see him. He sees me.
Dante.
He kneels beside me. His calm demeanor is refreshing. He is free of blood and sin, but his presence remains.