Page 111 of Our Secrets and Lies

The door closed and Jenny rushed over. ‘Well? What did he say? Your text sounded urgent.’

Sarah pulled her into the back room. ‘He’s coming over.’

‘What?’ Jenny gasped.

‘I tried stopping him. I told him it was too soon, that Lucy would freak, that he should wait until the summer, but he said he can’t wait any longer, he hasto see his kids.’

‘When?’

‘In three weeks. At Christmas.’

‘Let me talk to him. I’ll set him straight.’

Sarah shook her head. ‘There’s no point, Jenny. He’s their dad. He has a right to see them. He’s devastated about not knowing all these years – and he’s a lawyer. He knows his rights. We can’t stop him. He said all he wants to do is meet them. He promised not to interfere with Lucy’s parentingor anything like that, he just wants to meet his kids.’

‘But how the hell are we going to break this to Lucy? Feck it anyway.’ Jenny kicked the door. ‘She’s just got over the scare with Dylan and the drinking and is in good form again. This will kill her – seriously, Sarah.’

Sarah ran her hands through her hair. ‘I know, but what can we do? He’s their dad and they have a right to know him too.He wants to be in their lives … and maybe it’ll be a goodthing. He seems decent. We’ve been messaging back and forth. I’ve been filling him in a bit about the twins. Look.’

Jenny leant over as Sarah pulled up the message she’d received from Tom the day before.

I can’t believe the twins are in St Jude’s! I feel quite emotional about it. I’m picturing them walking down the corridors I walkeddown and eating in the canteen and swimming in the pool. It makes me feel closer to them somehow.

I’d rip my right arm off to see Dylan play. He must be awesome to have got a scholarship. I was sorry to hear Kelly is struggling a bit. It can’t be easy for her being in her brother’s shadow. I remember the girls at St Jude’s only too well, and some of them can be catty. Lucy never liked any ofmy girlfriends from school. But some of them were nice. Hopefully Kelly will make some friends soon. She sounds like such a brilliant, ballsy, gorgeous girl.

Thank you so much for sending photos. I have been staring at them for hours. Kelly looks so like my mother it’s uncanny. Dylan is all Lucy – what a handsome guy he is too. God, I feel so proud of them I could burst. I just wish I’d known.I wish I hadn’t missed all of their precious childhoods. I will never forgive my father, he robbed me of knowing my own children. I’m gutted by what he did.

I know you said wait, but I can’t, Sarah. I have to meet them. I’m going nuts here. I can’t eat, sleep or concentrate. I didn’t think it was possible to be so happy and devastated at the same time. I discover I have two wonderful childrenand they think I abandoned them. It’s killing me. I promise not to cause any trouble, but I need to meet my children. I need to tell them I didn’t know and, somehow, try to make it up to them. I also need to apologize to Lucy for leaving her that way. I will never forgive myself for that.

I’m giving you three weeks’ notice. My tickets are booked for the 19th. I know I won’t sleep a wink untilthen.

Jenny pursed her lips. ‘He sounds full of remorse, which is good, but it doesn’t change the fact that Lucy is going to flip out. The shock could kill her.’

‘I put him off as long as I could.’

‘Look,’ Jenny said, ‘I’m going to Milan for a few days, and I don’t want you saying anything to Lucy while I’m gone. Promise?’

Sarah nodded. ‘Okay, but we have just three weeks to try to figureout how to tell her and keep her from going over the edge.’

Jenny’s eyes welled up. ‘Poor Lucy,’ she whispered. ‘Jesus, it’s going to be one crazy Christmas this year.’

---