Page 16 of Our Secrets and Lies

‘Yes, Billy, but if she wants to keep the baby, she could defer for one year, as she said, then go back and finish her degree. It would only be a year out and we can help her and support her with the baby.’

‘We run our own business. How can we help raise a child?’

‘We’ll manage. I can do less hours in the shop and help look after the baby while Lucy studies.’ To Lucy,her mother said, ‘I’ll look after the baby and let you away back to college to finish your degree. If you really want to keep it, that’s wonderful. A child is a blessing – look at how much joy you and your sister have given us.’

‘Lucy has. Jenny’s given me pain in my arse mostly.’ Billy sniffed.

‘Stop that. Life would be less colourful without Jenny,’ Tina said. ‘And Lucy doesn’t have to giveup anything. She might have to defer, but what’s a year in a lifetime?’

At that moment Lucy loved her mother more than she’d thought possible.

‘I suppose that’s true,’ Billy admitted. ‘It would only be a year and sure that’s nothing. The child can be here with us during the day while you’re at lectures and … Yes, I suppose we could work it out. But where will you live?’

‘They can live hereuntil they find their feet,’ Tina said firmly.

‘With Tom and all?’ Billy said.

‘Yes, we’ll figure it all out,’ Tina assured him.

‘Well, I want to meet this Tom fella. I want him to come here and talk to us like a man. I want him to look me in the eye and tell me he’s going to take care of you and the baby. If he doesn’t, I’ll hunt him down and wring his neck.’

‘Yes, of course. I’ll get himto call in,’ Lucy said. ‘Do you really think I can do it? Keep the baby and be a lawyer too?’

‘You can do anything you put your mind to, Lucy,’ Tina said.

‘It won’t be easy, but I promise you this. I will not let you give up your dream. You’re going to follow your path, baby or no baby,’ Billy said.

‘I love you,’ Lucy cried, and threw her arms around them.‘You’re the best parents in the world.If I can be half the mother to this child, it’ll be very lucky.’

Lucy sat on Jenny’s bed and watched her sister applying highlighter to her cheekbones.

‘Pregnant? You? St Lucy? I still cannot actually believe it. You’re supposed to be the intelligent one in the family. If I got up the duff, Mum and Dad probably wouldn’t be surprised, but you! No wonder they’re walking around like zombies.’

‘Stop. I feel bad enough as it is.’

Lucy getting pregnant was a disaster for Jenny. Her parents were already over-protective and barely let her go to any discos or house parties. Now that her saint of a sister had fallen from grace – or, let’s be honest, had thrown herself off a cliff – Jenny’s life would be hell.

Her parents would never let her out. Every time she left the house they’d be thinking,Is she having sex with a boy? Is she going to come home pregnant like her sister? If Lucy could get pregnant, they would see very little hope for stupid non-academic Jenny. She would probably end up becoming a nun, just to get out of the house, or else she’d stay here, eating chocolate to help with her misery and loneliness, get really fat, watch TV all day and eventually, when she was founddead, three weeks after her actual death, they’d have to take the roof off the house and lift her out with a crane and build one of those oversized coffins to bury her massive body in. People would shake their heads and say, ‘She was once a hot blonde with great legs and look at her now.’ And it would be Lucy’s fault.

Jenny looked at her sister. She wanted to hate her but it was impossible. PoorLucy was a wreck. Her eyes were red and puffy from crying and she had big black bags under them. She was also as pale as a ghost. ‘You look like crap.’

‘Gee, thanks.’

‘Seriously, though, you need to make an effort. Let me do you up so you look hot when you see Tom in college tomorrow. You don’t want him to think you’ve let yourself go and are one step away from a housecoat and slippers. He mightdump you.’

‘Tom’s not going to dump me. He’s promised to stay with me.’

‘But are you really going to keep it?’ Jenny thought she was mad. If Jenny got pregnant, she’d be over to the UK in a flash. Who the hell wanted a screaming brat ruining their lives? A baby was for ever. You were stuck with it – you couldn’t hand it back – and then you’d worry about it for the rest of your life. Look ather mum and dad. They’d thought Lucy was sorted, twenty-one, in college, smart and sensible, and now they were crying about her pregnancy. They were pretending they were fine, for Lucy’s sake, but Jenny had seen her mother’s red eyes when she’d come into the kitchen that morning and found Billy sobbing into his coffee. They were completely gutted.

Lucy nodded. ‘It’s weird, but I feel so protectiveof the baby. It’s as if I have to look after it and keep it safe. I know it sounds mad, but it’s how I feel, and I think I can work it out. I’ll just defer for a year, then go back and finish my degree.’

‘Okay, it’s your funeral. But I will not be minding your kid. Do not even think about using me as your babysitter. And if Tom does move in – which is, like, so weird – you are not allowed tohave sex because the walls are thin and I do not want to have to listen to you two going at it.’

Lucy laughed. ‘Let’s take one step at a time.’

‘Okay, but I’m just saying, straight up, no child-minding and no sex.’

‘Thanks for your support, Jen!’ Lucy punched her playfully.

Jenny finished doing her face. At least she’d succeeded in making her sister smile. But a baby? She was worried thisTom guy was going to let Lucy down. She had a bad feeling about him, really bad.

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