Page 8 of Our Secrets and Lies

Lucy continued to pack. What did you need for an abortion? She presumed comfortable clothes and a warm coat. She was worried about everything. Most of all Tom.

His dad had basically locked him up since he’d asked him for the money for the abortion. He knew his schedule and demandedthat Tom come straight home after his lectures. He was like a tyrant and Tom seemed to be terrified of him. Whenever Lucy called him at home, the answering machine switched on. The only time she’d seen him in the last two weeks was in college, but it was difficult to talk with everyone around, and when they did sneak away for coffee, Tom seemed distant and distracted.

He’d barely been able tolook her in the eye for the last week. Lucy kept trying to reassure him and tell him everything would be okay. But then yesterday Tom had got really emotional and said he was afraid things wouldn’t work out: Lucy had no idea what his father was like and how much pressure he was putting on him.

‘Pressure to do what?’ Lucy had asked. ‘I’m having an abortion, what more does he want?’

Tom bit hislip. ‘He’s just a nightmare.’

‘We’ll pay him back the money and then he can’t hold any of this over you,’ Lucy said.

Tom reached out and took her hand. ‘I just want you to know that I love you and I’m sorry about all this mess.’

Lucy squeezed his hand. He loved her! The words she’d been waiting to hear. Her heart soared. Tom loved her. It was all going to be okay. ‘I love you too. We’ll befine. This will all be over soon.’

She was due to meet Tom that afternoon to get all the information from him. If everything was in place, they’d go as quickly as possible, which was why she wanted to be packed and ready. Apparently his father had organized everything and booked them flights and a top clinic in London. Lucy was relieved that she would be in good hands. She’d been terrified ofhaving a cheap abortion.

She finished packing and went downstairs to get something to eat, hoping she wouldn’t throw it up.

In the kitchen, her dad was humming one of his olde-worlde Irish tunes while he cooked. The door from the kitchen to the shop was open. Lucy hated it left open. If anyone came into the shop and walked up to the counter, they could see into the kitchen and into their privatelife.

It was bad enough having the family business attached to the house so you never got away from it, but letting people snoop into your kitchen – her mum, Jenny and Lucy all hated it. Billy told them they were silly and that it was a very practical way for him to be able to slip out of the shop and make himself food or coffee without missing any customers.

Billy turned when he heard Lucycome in. ‘Thank God it’s you and not that sister of yours. She’s in big trouble. I’m telling you, no daughter of mine is going to waste a good education. I’d have killed to go to a decent school. And Iwouldn’t mind but she has you as an example, her own sister in third-year law in Trinity and top of the class. How can she not want to follow that?’

Lucy forced a smile. If Billy ever found outthat his precious daughter was a stupid idiot who had got herself pregnant, he’d die of disappointment. Every time Lucy looked at her father, she knew she was making the right decision. Her mum would support her, no matter what, but Billy was so proud of having a daughter in college and doing law that he almost burst every time he told someone.

She hated lying to them and keeping secrets. She’dnever had to before. She had always had a brilliant relationship with her parents, which was why she found Tom and Gabriel’s so odd and sad. Her parents had always supported her and cheered her on. Granted she’d been an A student who’d never given them anything to worry about … until now.

She couldn’t wait for the abortion to be over. She’d bury the secret deep inside and forget it ever happened.Lucy was not going to let this bump in the road ruin her plan to graduate first in her class and work for the top law firm in Ireland. She planned to be a partner by the time she was thirty. She had it all mapped out and secretly she hoped that maybe Tom would be by her side in work and life.

Lucy poured herself a glass of orange juice. ‘Me and Jenny are different, Dad. She’s not as into studyingas I was. Maybe you’re putting a bit too much pressure on her.’

‘Pressure?’ Billy waved a wooden spoon in the air. ‘She’s lazy, that’s what she is, and I won’t have it. Now, enough about her, it’s bad for my blood pressure. What do you fancy for breakfast? I’m making scrambled egg.’

Lucy felt bile rise in her throat. ‘I’m actually not that hungry. I think I’ll just have toast. Where’s Mum?’

‘She’s in the shop.’

Billy spooned some of his egg onto a plate and sat down opposite Lucy. ‘So you’re off on a class trip for a few days tomorrow?’

Lucy nodded, keeping her head down so as not to be caught blushing. She’d always been a terrible liar. Jenny was a lot smoother at it. ‘I’m heading early in the morning and I’ll be back on Sunday night.’

‘Is it all people from your law class?’

‘Yes.’

‘Isn’t it great you’ve made such good friends? Is that fella you’re seeing going?’

‘No,’ Lucy lied. ‘Just girls.’

‘Good. I wouldn’t want some fella trying to take advantage of you. You’re a lovely girl with a brilliant future ahead of you. Don’t get distracted by fellas or any of that other stuff,’ Billy said.

Lucy nibbled her toast, saying nothing.

‘Mind you, it’s not you I’ve to worryabout, it’s that lunatic sister of yours. She needs to be reined in. She’s kicking up a storm about some party she wants to go to.’

Lucy looked up. ‘Maybe you should let her go, Dad.’

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