Page 40 of Seven Letters

‘Of course you are. You’ve had one hell of a shock. Let me take the pressure off you. Tell me everything you know now and send me all the details as they come in.’ Adam watched as Rob searched around for a pen and paper. ‘Shoot.’

Adam filled him in with what he knew.

‘I have all that. Send me any other details, tests, results, et cetera, and I’ll hunt down the best neurologist in Toronto and get you another opinion. I mean, if we have to, we’ll fly Sarah over here. I’ll do anything to help you.’

‘I … Jesus, Rob, thank you.’

‘Now tell me, how’s Izzy?’

Adam shook his head. ‘She doesn’t understand. I’ve just told her that Sarah is asleep because she’s not feeling well. I couldn’t tell her any more. I don’t understand it myself. If I can’t process it, how could she? Christ, Rob, I feel responsible. Sarah’s been really pale and tired the last few days, but I’ve been so bloody busy with work that I didn’t push her to see the doctor. I should have. I should have realized she was sick.’

‘Come on, Adam, don’t start blaming yourself. This is no one’s fault. Brain injuries can be almost impossible to detect. You adore Sarah. You’d lay down your life to save hers. You can’t take the blame for any of this.’

‘But it’s my job to protect my family,’ Adam cried.

On the screen, Rob pointed a finger at him. ‘Don’t do that. This is not your fault. It’s a freak accident. Look, we both have this crazy need to be successful, to be the best, to provide for and protect our families because of Dad. But wecan’t do that. All we can do is show up every day and do our best, and you always do, Adam. You always do.’

Adam could hear the language of his brother’s therapy sessions coming out in what Rob was saying. He didn’t agree. ‘It’s not just about showing up, Rob, it’s about creating a safe home. All we ever had at home was a drunk, useless fecker either passed out or shouting at us.’

‘I know, and it was awful. I’ll never forget the feeling of being hungry, cold and abandoned. But we won’t undo that hurt by killing ourselves trying to be perfect. We have to accept that we can only do our best. You’re a great husband and father, Adam. And Sarah thinks that, too. I know she does.’

He wasn’t, though. He was a husband who didn’t come home to his wife because he was so busy trying to make more money. He was a father who didn’t kiss his daughter goodnight because getting a new contract was more important. Adam had sworn, standing beside his father’s grave, that he would be a better man. In many ways he had been, but not good enough.

‘I can see your face. I know you’re trying to blame yourself. Stop it. This is just a horrible twist of Fate.’

Adam rubbed his face. ‘She’s the love of my life, Rob.’

‘I know she is,’ Rob said softly. ‘You two were made for each other. But she’s a strong woman, Adam. She’ll fight to get back to you. I’ll start working on a second opinion here and we’ll do everything humanly possible to help her. You’ve got to stay hopeful, OK?’

Thanks, Rob,’ Adam said. ‘I really needed to talk to you. Thanks for being there. I’d better get back to the hospital. I’ll be in touch.’

Adam watched his brother’s face disappear from the screen. Rob was two years younger than him, but they wereas close as twins. When you had no mother and a deadbeat dad, your brother was everything. When Rob had emigrated to Canada ten years ago, Adam had been gutted. He’d missed him so much. They’d gone from talking every day to once a week, and then Adam had got married and had Izzy, and later on Rob had married Ellen, and now they only spoke about once a month. Adam realized with a pang how much he missed his brother. He was his rock.

Adam gathered up his stuff and got ready to go back to Sarah. He felt better after the Skype call – calmer and stronger after hearing Rob’s voice and feeling his support and love.

Maybe things would be OK after all.

14

Riley sat in Shocko’s desk chair with her feet up on the corner of his bed. Her black school shoes lay on the floor beside her. Shocko lay propped up on his pillows, leaning against the wall he’d painted black, then covered with a huge Che Guevara poster.

‘Duuuuuuude, that is messed up.’ Shocko’s eyes were wide. ‘A coma is, like,reallyserious.’

‘Do people usually wake up from them?’ Riley asked, as she flicked through her Instagram page. Her hands were trembling. She hadn’t been able to stop shaking since her mum had told her Sarah was in an actual coma. She was trying really hard not to freak out. Sarah had to get better: she was the best aunt ever. Riley loved her so much.

‘I dunno. It depends.’

‘On what?’

‘Well, I’m not totally sure but, like, if you’re totally obese I guess that would go against you or if you smoked two hundred a day or were, like, a heroin addict or something.’

‘If you’re a heroin addict, you’re probably going to die anyway,’ Riley snapped.

‘Not necessarily. Look at whatshisname.’

‘Who?’

‘You know, the guy in that band.’

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