Page 86 of Seven Letters

‘Hat.’

‘I suppose that would be kind of boring.’

Riley beamed inside. Outwardly she just shrugged.

‘Actually, I was thinking about you the other night.’

Riley’s heart pounded. ‘Yeah?’ She tried to sound nonchalant.

‘Yeah. My dad was watching this documentary about the Vietnam war and I sat down for just a minute but then I got really into it. Did you know that the Vietnam war lasted nearly twenty years and is the longest war in the history of the US? And, like, more than three million people were killed during the conflict? But only fifty-eight thousand of them were Americans.’

Riley grinned. She was about to say, ‘Yes, I did know that because I read this really amazing book calledBorn on the Fourth of July’, but instead she said, ‘No, wow, that’s really interesting.’

Zach beamed at her. ‘I know, right?’

Riley basked in the glow of his smile. If she had to play down her knowledge a tiny bit, so what? He was worth it.

‘So, what happens to the other two sisters in the story?’ Zach asked, looking at the book Riley was holding and breaking that lovely spell.

‘Meg marries Laurie’s tutor and then Beth gets really sick. And Jo is the one who looks after her and tries to make her better. She loves Beth so much she just can’t bear to see her so sick.’

‘Does Beth get better?’

Riley shook her head. ‘No, she doesn’t, she gets worse, and Jo is so upset. And then Beth, well … she dies.’ Rileyducked her head because she suddenly felt a tsunami of emotions rising inside her. Beth dies, just like Sarah and now the baby too. Riley could see her beautiful aunt in the hospital bed with all those tubes sticking out of her. She tried to shake away the memory and think of Sarah alive and smiling, but she couldn’t.

‘Uhm, are you OK?’

Riley croaked, ‘Sorry, it’s just my aunt.’

‘The one in the coma?’

‘She’s dead,’ Riley whispered.

Zach reached out and took her hand. ‘Oh, God, I’m sorry. I know you were close to her. I remember you talking about her. Sarah, right?’

Riley nodded. He remembered.

‘Look, do you want to go home? We can do this another time. You’ve got way too much going on.’

Riley shook her head. ‘No, I want to stay here and do this. It’s a good distraction.’

What she really wanted was for Zach to scoop her up. She wanted to sit on his knee and lay her head on his chest and feel his strong arms around her and hear him whisper in her ear, ‘You rock.’

She wanted to tell him how much she hurt. She wanted to tell him she was doing everything wrong. She was saying the wrong things to her mother and father and everyone. She wanted to tell him that she loved him and that she needed him right now. She needed to know he was there for her. She wanted to talk, to FaceTime him for hours every night, and have him tell her she was great and that it was going to be OK. That her mum would be OK, that her little cousin would be OK, that her dad would get a job and they wouldn’t be kicked out of the house, like she her heard her mum tell her dad they might. She wanted Zach to tell her she was gorgeous and special and not astupid loser, who wasn’t helping anyone and kept putting her foot in it. She wanted to tell him that she loved her mother and wanted Mia to know that, but she couldn’t find the words. She wanted to tell him that her life at home was hell. She wanted to tell him that she had never felt so alone or sad.

‘Are you sure?’ Zach asked.

‘Yeah, I’ll be fine. You know me, I’m strong,’ Riley said.

‘Look, Riley, I’m sorry about –’

Harry’s fat arse landed in the middle of their table. ‘So, what are you guys doing? I bet Riley’s making you do some worthy book like Nelson Mandela’s autobiography that’s, like, four thousand pages long.’

‘No, we’re doingLittle Women.’

‘What’s that about? Midgets being discriminated against?’

‘No, it’s about these four sisters who –’

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