Page 99 of Seven Letters

Adam struggled to explain. ‘Because she’s very sick and only the doctors can see her at the moment.’

‘Why can’t they give her medicine to wake her up?’ Izzy asked, tears welling in her eyes.

Adam reached out and held her hand. ‘They’re trying, Sweet-pea, but she can’t wake up.’

‘But why, Daddy?’

‘Because she had this lump in her head and it made her very sick and now she’s asleep and, to be honest, Izzy, she …’ Adam tried to choose his words carefully. ‘Mummy might not wake up.’

Izzy shook her head. ‘Maybe not for the moment, but Iknow for sure she’ll wake up for my Communion. I know it for one hundred per cent sure. Mummy will not be asleep for my special day. No way.’

Adam didn’t have the courage to tell her otherwise. How do you speak the words that will break a child’s heart? He looked at Rob, who shrugged helplessly.

Izzy took off her glasses and began to clean them with the edge of her skirt. ‘So, if Mummy can’t do my hair, then Mia or Riley can. I can go over after school tomorrow and wash it there.’

‘No, Izzy. I’ve told you I want you to stay away from Mia and Riley for the moment.’

‘But I don’t understand. You said you had a fight, so just say sorry and make up.’

‘It’s a bit more complicated than that.’

‘But I want to see Riley and Mia and Johnny.’

‘I know, but just for the moment we’re going to let things cool off. It’ll all be fine, but for now I need you to stay away.’

‘But I don’t want to. I love them. They’re my family. Riley’s my only cousin. I want Riley to do my hair.’

‘Not at the moment, Izzy. I’ll do it. You can show me how, and it’ll be fun.’

‘It’s not fair!’ Izzy shouted. ‘You have Uncle Rob and I have no one. I want to see Riley.’

‘You have me and Uncle Rob,’ Adam said. ‘We’re here for you, Izzy.’

‘I want to see Riley,’ she moaned.

‘Maybe we could …’ Rob began, but Adam shot him a warning look.

‘It’ll be OK, Izzy, I promise. Me, you and Rob make a great team.’

‘I hate you and I hate Mummy for not waking up and I hate everyone and everything and the whole stinky world and … and …’ Izzy began to wail, her whole body shaking.

Adam held her close and rocked her. He couldn’t look up at Rob. He didn’t want to see the expression on his face. Izzy was distraught. He rocked her and rocked her until she fell asleep in his arms from sheer exhaustion, and he prayed that he was doing the right thing for his family.

Adam sat in the ICU waiting room, drinking a tepid coffee and trying to work himself up to go and sit with Sarah. Angela had just told him that Sarah’s infection had got worse and he was dreading seeing her. A man of about his age was sitting on the couch opposite, talking quietly into his phone. Adam could hear snippets of his conversation.

‘He’s not good … You need to get a flight. He’ll want to see you … Yeah, eighty-two is a good age … Still, he’s our dad … OK … Call me with your flight time.’

Eighty-twowasa good age. Eighty-two was the right age to die. Not thirty-four. Thirty-four was stupidly young – you had decades ahead of you. Sarah would never see Izzy grow up, graduate, get married, have babies. She was going to miss her daughter’s whole life. Adam hunched over, trying to block out everything else and focus on the one positive: his son. Sarah’s parting gift.

The man opposite got up to leave the room. He and Rob almost collided as Rob pushed open the door to come in.

‘I brought fresh coffee,’ Rob said, holding up two cups. ‘Here.’ He handed one to Adam. ‘You’ll probably never drink another coffee as long as you live after all this.’

They sat in silence for a few minutes. Then Rob said, ‘Adam, I got a text from Mia to say she’d had a letter asking her to stay away. Is that true?’

‘I had to do something,’ Adam said. His heart was pounding with all the caffeine and he felt jittery and nauseous.

‘You sent them a legal letter?’ Rob said, and it was clear hewas shocked. ‘Jesus, no wonder Mia was so upset. Adam, this is your family. It’s Sarah’s family. Do you think that was fair?’

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