Page 73 of Good Sisters

Julie took my hand in hers. ‘We’re your sisters, we’ll alwaysbe here for you, and I know how hard it’s been since Mum died, for you and for Clara.’

‘Yeah, it really has been,’ I admitted.

We raised our glasses in a clinking toast and drank deeply.

Julie put her glass down. ‘Now, can we talk about Italian Danny DeVito again?’

We ordered another round of drinks and planned our trip to Italy to meet Clara’s father. I was dreading it: Clara was my everything, and it was my job to protect her. She wanted to meet her dad so I had to facilitate that, but I was terrified of how all this change would affect her. She was so fragile. I was very glad my sisters were coming with me. Having them there would make this awful experience easier to bear.

‘I have a suggestion to make,’ Sophie said. ‘Will we bring Dad?’

‘To Italy?’ Julie frowned.

‘Yes. He’s lonely, he’s lost, he’s mad about Clara and Louise, and you said he’s been making a big effort to be more involved with her. Maybe we should include him.’

‘I don’t know. It’s going to be really emotional and delicate and I can’t be worrying about Dad when I’m trying to figure out this massive decision.’

‘Julie and I will look after him. You wouldn’t have to do anything,’ Sophie added.

‘I actually think it’s a good idea. I feel a bit guilty that we aren’t spending more time with him. Dad could be helpful. It might not be a bad thing to have a man with us. Just in case Marco turns out to be a tricky character,’ Julie pointed out.

I wasn’t sure. I didn’t want Dad putting his foot in it or trying to control the situation or give me advice. I knew what I had to do. I needed quiet background support, nothing else.

‘I think he’d love to be involved and he’s good at advice.He was amazing when Jack lost everything. He gave me brilliant advice,’ Sophie reminded us.

‘We’ll make sure he doesn’t do or say anything to interfere, although to be fair, Dad is pretty subtle, unlike Mum.’ Julie laughed.

‘She’d certainly have had something to say about everything and everyone,’ I agreed.

‘Dad will be easy. He’ll just be in the background, quietly supporting you,’ Sophie said.

I needed to think about it. My head was spinning with everything that was happening.

‘Leave it with me. I’m not saying no, but I’m not saying yes either. I need to process everything for a few days.’

‘As soon as you’ve decided, let us know and I’ll book our flights,’ Sophie said.

Julie reached over and hugged me. ‘It’ll be okay. We’re all here for you.’

I knew they were, but at the end of the day it was my daughter’s life and happiness that hung in the balance.

18. Sophie

Balancing a casserole dish on my left arm, I pulled out my keys and let myself into the house.

‘Dad?’ I called.

I could hear music coming from the kitchen. Mozart, Dad’s favourite. It reminded me of being a kid, sitting at the table while Dad cooked us breakfast on a Sunday. Sunday morning was Mum’s time off. She would lie in bed reading novels. The music brought me right back. Happy memories.

I’d been lucky. I’d had a lovely childhood with two parents who loved each other and stayed together through thick and thin. I’d wanted that for Jess, and I felt so guilty that I hadn’t provided it. Instead, she’d weathered lots of upheaval with me and Jack falling apart and separating, then getting back together, and Jack bringing a half-brother for Jess into the mix. It was messy and I felt bad about it. Some days I felt I was a decent enough parent, others that I was failing miserably and Jess would pay the price.

At least the Sebastian fling appeared to have cooled off. Jess was being really moody and grumpy lately, and she wouldn’t talk to me about it, but she was on her phone much less and hadn’t asked to go out since the rugby party. I was hoping that meant they had broken up. Julie had told me she’d had a word with Jess after Sebastian had been obnoxious to some people at the party, and Jess had told her she was done with him. Hallelujah! I knew he’d eventually reveal himself to be as nasty as his mother. Thank God it had happened sooner rather than later. I was so grateful to Julie forpointing it out and getting through to Jess. I owed my sister, big-time.

As I pushed open the kitchen door, I heard Dad laughing and then a very female giggle. I walked in and stopped dead. The kitchen lights were on low and the table was set with candles and Mum’s best china – the set she used only on Christmas Day. Sitting opposite Dad was Dolores, in Mum’s chair.

Dad jumped up when he saw me. ‘Sophie … I didn’t … I …’ he stuttered.

‘I called, but obviously you couldn’t hear with the music and the giggling.’ I tried to keep my voice calm, but I felt shocked to my core.

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