Page 103 of The In-Laws

Katie hugged her again. ‘You’re the best. You and Melanie are the sisters I never had.’

‘You’re the best friends I never had,’ Amanda replied, and she meant it. They were.

35. Katie

Katie handed the kids their lunchboxes.

Lucy peered inside. ‘Wow, Mummy, you made a heart-shaped sandwich.’ Her eyes shone with happiness.

‘And mine’s a car!’ Toby exclaimed.

Katie’s heart ached. She should have done more of these things. She’d always said, ‘I’m not a morning person,’ but she was. She wasn’t a morning person because in the evenings she’d always have a few glasses of wine, stay up late and be tired when the alarm went off. Now she loved mornings. In the last two weeks she had got up every morning, gone swimming and been back at seven thirty to wake the kids for school. The first week was so hard: she’d had constant headaches and had had to dig deep not to reach for wine in the evenings, but every time she wanted to drink she thought about waking up in that hotel room and the shame stopped her. She’d talked a lot to her old coach, Fred, sending her words heavenwards. When she’d listened for his answer, she’d heard him say, ‘One more lap, Katie, just one more.’ It was what he’d said to her when she was training as a swimmer. Katie translated it as ‘One more day without a drink, Katie, just one more day’.

One evening when she’d felt she was about to crack, she’d had to call Amanda, who had told her to get into the car and meet her for a swim – Katie’s second swim of the day – but whatever worked.

She’d had two sessions with the therapist, who had been brilliant. Katie liked her immediately and felt safe in herhands, but it was exhausting. She spent most of the sessions crying. So much pain from her childhood, which she had deeply buried, was coming up. As challenging as it was, she knew it would help her quit drinking and be a better person. And even though she was drained, she also felt lighter.

By the end of the first alcohol-free week Katie felt clear-headed and ready for the day. She had energy she hadn’t had before. She had met the nicest people too. There weren’t that many daily early-morning swimmers in the little cove she went to, so they all chit-chatted to each other in the water and while they were getting changed. It was a complete mish-mash of people, all ages, sizes and backgrounds. But they loved their morning swims and everyone left smiling. No one asked why each person was there, but Katie could tell that some went because it helped them cope with whatever they were dealing with. ‘You never regret a swim. It’s good for the soul and the mind,’ an older lady had told Katie, and it was true. Being in the water every day soothed her and reminded her of happy times when she was younger. It felt familiar and cleansing.

The only thing she hadn’t done yet was tell Jamie. She needed to build up to it. Katie smiled at her kids. I was missing all of this, she thought. She had made the kids their lunches every day, but never enjoyed it. She’d considered it a chore, not the privilege it was. Her mother would have loved to live long enough to make Katie’s lunches all through school. Katie was ashamed of how negative she’d been about it. Now the morning was her favourite part of the day. She was determined to have more fun with the kids instead of hustling them out to school and snapping at them for being slow to get ready because she had a wine headache. Now, she played music and sang songs with them.

‘Okay, it’s Toby’s turn to choose the music this morning, what’s our song today?’

‘I want the Happy Song.’

‘Nooooooo, Toby, we had that the last time.’

‘I like it and I want it.’

‘Muuuum?’ Lucy pleaded.

In the past the whining and arguing would have made her cross. The old Katie would have told them both to shush and not played any music.

‘Hey, come on now. It’s Toby’s choice. You can choose your song tomorrow. Come on, Lucy, if you sing along, it’ll put you in a great mood.’ Katie tickled her daughter. She got her to giggle and she played the song loudly as they all sang at the top of their voices.

‘Can we turn it down a bit?’ Jamie entered the kitchen covering his ears.

‘NO WAY!’ Toby shouted.

Jamie looked pleadingly at Katie. ‘It’s eight a.m., can we please tone it down?’

‘Nope.’ Katie grinned and sang along.

‘Who are you?’ Jamie asked.

‘I’m me.’ Katie kissed his cheek.

‘You’re like two a.m. Katie at eight a.m.,’ Jamie pointed out.

‘You can have just as much fun in the morning.’

‘Since when? You’ve never been a morning person.’

‘I used to be years ago, when I swam a lot, but then … well … I want the kids to go to school full of music and laughter.’

‘Okay, that’s cool and I’m all for it, but does it have to be this loud?’

‘YES!’ Toby and Lucy shouted.

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