Page 46 of Lord of the Lock

“It felt…good,” I admitted. “But not as good as I remembered. I think rugby brings out the parts of me I don’t always love. I could have really hurt Charlie there.”

“Shame, Garrett was on the sidelines singing your praises.” Nathan said. I felt my cheeks heat. It was nice to be noticed again. “And I don’t mind you teaching him a lesson or two.”

“What a wonderful fake fiancé you have, he’s so violent,” I replied.

It took Nathan a second. “Did you just paraphrase Tom Baker’s Doctor Who at me?”

“Maybe, young Padawan. Now let me get fully showered off so we can go and live long and prosper.”

“Anything butTrek,” Nathan complained, but he was smiling. “And I don’t know how fake this any more.”

“Nor me,” I said. “I love you. I know it’s stupidly early, I know our whole relationship has been under false pretences. But I can’t pretend that I’m pretending any more. I’ve never felt such a connection with anyone.”

“Me neither,” said Nathan. “You make me feel safe.”

“Shall we go and celebrate?” I asked. “Come meet more of the rugby lads. Everyone at the open day loved you and Ben is collecting older queer role models like Pokémon cards. And I want to chat to Garrett about why the fuck he’s here.”

“Sounds good to me, I shouldn’t need to be home until…” he looked down at his phone. “Shit, I’ve got like twelve missed calls from Dad.” He held the phone up to his ear, and frowned. “He’s not answering. I’ve…I’ll have to go home, check on him.”

“I’ll come with you,’” I said.

“No, don’t worry about it. It shouldn’t take too long, and you should be celebrating.”

“If you want me there, I’m there,” I said. I held out a hand and Nathan took it. “Let’s go.”

24

Chapter Twenty-Four - Nathan

Having Finn by my side and knowing that he was a more permanent addition there now — not that we’d spoken about permanence, but surelyI love youwas more than a temporary thing — just felt so easy.

Being with Finn had started as a shield for me to protect myself from bullies. But our relationship had evolved, and now more than anything he felt like a comfort blanket. I could protect myself, but he was there to keep me warm and content and I hoped he felt the same about me.

His metal-studded bootsclip-clippedon the pavement as he walked alongside me and I looked him up and down. Finn was muddy and grazed from rugby. “Shit, sorry, I should have sent you to shower off,” I said.

“Don’t be stupid. We need to get home for your dad.”

“If he’s not just struggling with the fucking TV remote again,” I said. “I’ve had enough of him being deliberately pathetic. If he’s gonna be the third man I have to give a bollocking to today…”

“Who was the first?” Finn asked.

Oh. Shit.We hadn’t actually talked about that yet. “Lewis.”

“Shit! I totally forgot? Did he…”

“Try it on with me? No,” I laughed. “He actually asked me how I got so happy, and how I got you all lovestruck. Made me realise that he was very right. I was punishing myself by acting like we were pretending. So I ran off, left him with the bill and came to tell you I loved you.”

“Fucking hell,” said Finn.

“Quite.”

We walked up the street to my house. The living room curtains were still drawn, and I couldn’t see any lights on. “That’s not right,” I muttered. “He leaves every light on in the house just to piss my mum off about the electric bill…”

I hurried quicker toward the front door and Finn kept pace, never letting go of my hand.

I opened the door and peered into the darkness of the hallway. “Dad?” I called.

I couldn’t hear a reply. “Dad? You there?”

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