Page 45 of Full Service

“Fucking hell, I’m graduating to the spare room when Beca moves out. Promise.”

I laughed with him then, and everything seemed to slot into place. Without the millstone of his position over me hanging in the air between us, I could feel the easy relationship we’d started to feed the beginnings of now really starting to take its place.

“Fuck!” I blurted. “I didn’t thank you! Thank you!”

Hywel laughed again. “No problem. It’s only my whole life thrown away.”

I sensed that behind the laugh there was some pain. Even if he wanted to start again, to go from business empire to employee at a small town consultancy must hurt just a little bit.

“You know, you don’t have to stay on the sofa til Beca moves out. You can always stay with me. I don’t take up too much of the bed. And I don’t snore.”

Hywel snorted. “If your behaviour after a drink is any indication of how you are sober, I highly doubt that. Noisiest fucking starfish I’ve ever met.”

It was my turn to feel my cheeks heat. “Fine. Maybe I snore a bit. And maybe I starfish. No pressure though. You can always stay on the sofa at mine too. I’m sure it’s much comfier than Prentis’.”

“You do have a much comfier sofa,” Hywel agreed.

Things went quiet for a moment, except for the sound of waves below us and the wind whistling through the grass. It felt like we were on the edge of something and I just didn’t know how to talk to Hywel.

His fingers brushed again mine, and for a second I felt like it might have been an accident. But then they brushed again, slower, and lingered.

“What is this?” I asked. I knew I was being quiet, even though someone probably couldn’t hear us talking from even a couple of metres away. If there had been anyone else around at all.

Hywel’s fingers brushed up against mine once more and I took the initiative, grabbing them, Perhaps a little roughly. But a glance at him showed a little smile playing at the edge of his lips.

“I don’t know,” said Hywel. “But I know that it’s been weird, this last few days without you. Was almost getting used to your grumpy arse.”

“I’m a very accommodating arse, I’ll have you know,” I said. I regretted my words as soon as they were out and I heard Hywel chuckling. “Shut up.”

“Not a chance.” Hywel squeezed my hand, and I turned to face him properly now. He was looking into my eyes with his, eyes that reflected the colour of the sea below. Behind them, something just as deep and just as turbulent was stirring.Fuck me, I hadn’t been a poet before. But that man could inspire an illiterate to write.

“Everything OK back there?” Hywel asked, smiling gently.

“All…I’m…fuck it.” I leaned in to kiss him, threading my fingers through the back of his hair and pulling him close without speaking any more. I didn’t have the words, but I did have this. The action. One movement to make him see what I was feeling.

Hywel pulled back from the kiss. Had I misjudged things completely? No, he was smiling.Fuck,this was why I never did emotions. This all felt so confusing.

“What?” I finally asked, Hywel still smiling at me.

“Just…fuck, it’s cold. Can we do this in the car?” There must’ve been something in my expression because Hywel rolled his eyes before continuing. “Talk! I meant totalkin the car.”

“Sure. Sure. Sure. Sounds good.” I led him back to the car, not letting go of his hand until we had to split to get in separate sides.

“Where to?” I asked.

“Home? Yours,” Hywel replied. I felt my ears heat beyond the cold and I turned on the engine to get the car warm. Hopefully with the heat it would be a little bit harder to see the blush that had been creeping up my cheeks and past the beard that was so good at keeping it locked away.

“Sorry. It’s just…I’ve only known you, well, known youagain, for a very short time.”

“You’ve known me since I was six, we just had a lot of growing up to do,” I replied, cutting from open dirt track into a side country lane that would take us around the village rather than through it.

“Shh, I’m trying to say something. It’s just that… there’s something there. And I hope you feel it too because the last few days being stuck in the house with Prentis and Beca it feels like I’ve lost an arm.”

I swallowed, my stomach churning. He’d put into words exactly how I felt.

“And I know I’ve been a prick,” he said, “but if I’m here now for the foreseeable future...can we try something? I don’t know what, exactly, but…”

“You think you’ve been a prick?” I said, rounding the corner of the yard. “I got pissed and took your car apart into pieces? That was fucking unhinged of me.”

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