Page 38 of The Fadeaway

“I told her I’d been in love with men for as long as I could remember, and that, yes, I did and do still love her, but only as the mother of my children.” Lyle paused and poured a ribbon of cream into his coffee cup, stirring it with a silver spoon. “And I told her that the only person in my life who knew about it wasyou, and that you’d encouraged me over and over to be safe, and to come clean to her about it all. She appreciated that.”

Burt Ingram stopped at their table, clad in linen slacks and sunglasses, his wife close behind him. “Morning,” Burt said curtly, looking as though he might say more. “I hope you two have had a great weekend.”

“Fabulous,” Patty said for them both, smiling up at Burt insincerely. “Really nice weekend, Burt.”

The Ingrams move on then, and Patty watched them as they stopped at the table of another partner and his wife, chatting amiably and pointing out at the vineyard.

“So what now?” Patty asked, lowering her voice and placing both elbows on the table as she leaned towards Lyle. “Is she divorcing you?”

Lyle scoffed. “No. She is definitely not divorcing me, Patty.”

Patty leaned back in surprise. “She’s not?” She would have instantly left any man who admitted to her that he preferred the company of men. Or at least she thought she would have.

“No. Susan is perfectly happy with the lifestyle that I provide her. She loves that Zoey and Theo have two parents, and, maybe most importantly, Patty—we’re friends. We get each other. We’ve been together since college. No one knows me better than Susan.”

Patty bit her lip; until Susan found that letter in Lyle’s briefcase,Pattyhad known Lyle better than Susan had. But it wasn’t worth mentioning at that point.

“I’m happy for you,” Patty said carefully. She reached for the carafe of coffee and topped off her own cup as she glanced at the way Burt Ingram’s wife’s diamond tennis bracelet glinted in the sun two tables away. And really, what did she know anyway? Maybe she should just be happy for them. Ruben had died and left her a single mother after only thirteen years of marriage. Who could say what might have happened betweenthem if they’d had decades together as husband and wife? What compromises and understandings might they have had to come to in order to survive, in order to weather the storm together?

“Thank you,” Lyle said, watching her. “And thank you for being my friend, Patty. Through all of this. Not many people would stand by someone’s side and be as nonjudgmental as you have. I appreciate it more than you will ever know.”

“So…are you able to just date who you want now?” Patty frowned.

“Oh, god no. Susan’s only request is my continued discretion. No one at the firm. No one in our circle, and, preferably, only people I meet outside of L.A.”

Patty nodded and looked around pensively as she sipped her coffee. Arrangements. Agreements. Accommodations. She nodded again. She’d supported Lyle and loved her friendship with him thus far, and she would continue to do so—on one condition.

“I want to have lunch with Susan,” Patty said.

Lyle’s face blanched. “Why?”

“Not to talk about anything that would upset you,” Patty promised him. “I just want to make sure she’s got someone to talk to. Because look, Lyle, you have me to talk to, but she has no one. She isn’t going to call up her mother and chat about you being gay. She’s not having a cocktail with her gardening club and discussing that you prefer the company of men, or mentioning that you have sex with other guys the next time she’s at dinner with her sister. She needs someone who sees her. And I want to be that person. That’s all I’m asking.”

Lyle considered this thoughtfully as he sipped his coffee. When he finally set his cup down on its saucer, he gave a single nod. “Consider it done. Or at least consider it offered, because I will tell her you’d like to have lunch.” Lyle stayed quiet for a long moment. “You know, Patty, there’s truly no one like you. I’venever met another woman who would befriend someone in my shoes, much less insist on befriending his long-suffering wife as well, just so that she won’t feel alone. You’re something else.”

Patty sipped her coffee again and smacked her lips loudly as she took this in. “I am something else, Lyle,” she agreed. “But what that something is is somewhat undefined.”

He cracked a smile then and they both laughed.

“Oh, Patty,” he said, shaking his head. “My dear Patty.”

Ruby

There is a commotion outside of Lyle Westover's room and Ruby looks up from the book in her lap. Lyle has fallen asleep as she waited for him to come back to her and regain the clarity that he had when she walked into the room.

"Code Six," a nurse says calmly as she races by the open door to Lyle's room. Several other nurses in scrubs follow closely on her heels, and Ruby glances at Lyle to see if this stirs him. It does not.

"Hi." Zoey pokes her head into the room. She sees that her dad is sleeping and drops her volume. "Any luck?"

Ruby stands up and sets her book on the chair, then follows Zoey out into the hall. "Not too much," Ruby says. She folds her arms over her chest. "He seemed completely with it there, and then...I don't know. Just gone."

"It goes like that." Zoey glances back into the room again and her eyes linger on the figure of her sleeping father. "He's here one minute and gone the next."

"Do your parents get to see one another?" Ruby asks gently.

"They do. We bring Mom over here two Sundays a month and she spends the whole day with him if he's having a good day,but if he isn't sure who we are, then we just visit for a bit, take her out to lunch, and get her back to her facility."

"That's a lot." Ruby watches her with admiration. "And I'm assuming you and your brother have families and lives of your own to care for."

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