Page 19 of The Cruise

‘I need to do something with my hair.’ Kath raked her heavy fringe to one side. ‘I had an appointment at the hairdressers in Garstang before we came away. But I forgot to go.’ Her eyebrows pulled together, the crease deep. ‘My memory let me down again.’

‘I’ve never been to a hairdresser,’ Jane said, ‘I’ve always cut my own hair.’

‘Maybe treat yourself?’ Ann reasoned. ‘Your short cut is quite masculine, and white hair can be ageing.’

Jane peered at Anne over the rim of her Irish whiskey cream liqueur. She rattled the ice in the glass, then pulled a face and poked out her tongue.

Anne ignored Jane’s grimace. ‘There’s a beauty salon on board, why don’t we see if we can get appointments while we’re at sea?’

‘I’d be up for that; I seem to be embracing change.’ Kath stroked her new dress and sipped her coconut liqueur.

‘Not on your life.’ Jane shook her head. ‘You can dream on if you think I’m going to be tweaked and permed. My hair has got me this far just as it is. I’m sure it won’t make one bit of difference to keep the same style to see out my days.’

‘You shouldn’t be afraid to come out of your comfort zone,’ Anne said. ‘You’ve made a start by buying brighter clothes and look how much happier you feel.’

‘My hair is fine.’ Jane was adamant. ‘The cabaret is about to start, so let’s sit back and enjoy it.’

Jane wriggled into a comfortable position and glanced around the auditorium. She could see that Bridgette was sitting next to Selwyn, a few rows away. As she stared, Selwyn looked up. His large eyes fixed on Jane, and his face broke into a smile. They’d spoken briefly during dinner, and there was something about the man that unsettled her, but she couldn’t work out what it was. She wasn’t good at engaging with members of the opposite sex. Most people considered Jane sexless and described her as a spinster.

As the cabaret began, Jane knew that Selwyn was still watching her and, embarrassed, she turned away.

TheDiamond StarDancing Troupe performed a dazzling routine for the next fifteen minutes and was joined on stage by a female vocalist. Melissa Montana had a powerful voice as she sang a repertoire of cover songs familiar to the audience, many of whom joined in. As Melissa left the stage, Peter appeared and introduced the final act of the evening.

‘This comedian should be good.’ Anne nudged Kath and clapped enthusiastically. ‘I’ve seen his book in the duty-free shop.’

‘Ladies and gentlemen, let’s hear a big round of applause for our number one cruise ship entertainer. Here’s Dicky Delaney!’

* * *

Dicky stepped onto the stage. Already, he was buzzing from the audience’s warm response. The band struck up, and, taking the microphone from Peter, he launched into song.

Oh, the weather outside is frightful.

But the fire is so delightful.

Since we’ve no place to go

Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow.

‘That fooled you!’ he called out, searching the faces before him, ‘you thought you were on the wrong cruise.’ There was a titter of laughter as Dicky studied the audience. Confident that they were all of a ‘certain age’, he began his routine.

‘Your pension doesn’t go far on a cruise, does it?’ He paused. ‘Barbados, Bermuda, Aruba...’ The audience began to laugh. ‘The housekeeper was hoovering the floor by my cabin today, and I heard the boss say, “Can you hoover the carpet in the lift?” Dicky placed his free hand on his hip, ‘“What?” the housekeeper replied. “On every floor?”’

His jokes continued.

‘I’ve had my hair cut today...’

‘Which one?’ Harold called out.

Dicky held his hand up and smiled. ‘I’ve had it cut for a film, ladies and gentlemen.’ He paused again. ‘I’m watching a movie tomorrow.’

Relaxed at the end of a busy day and sipping drinks from the tempting cocktail list, the audience enjoyed Dicky’s dated jokes. By the time he broke into his final song to end his act, Dicky had made eye contact with the most attractive woman in the room and gave her a wink as he left the stage. He’d always preferred blondes and intended to seek out the pretty woman in the peach-coloured dress, with deliciously tanned legs, who’d sat on the front row and smiled throughout his act.

As he high-fived Peter backstage, he thought, ‘So far, so good.’

ChapterNine

The Deck Café was busy as Kath, Jane, and Anne wandered amongst the early risers until they found a table under the shade of a large umbrella. The sea was calm, and overnight the soft, steady hum of the ship’s engines had soon lulled them to sleep. Feeling refreshed after a good night’s rest, they looked forward to the day as theDiamond Starmade its way to Grenada.

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