Page 62 of The Cruise Club

‘But food is one of the highlights of a cruise.’ Fran smiled. ‘After all, it says in the glossy brochure that one must enjoy the culinary voyage and savour every flavour.’

‘It might be the sales pitch, but we’re not used to so much gorging.’ He thought of the porridge that generally started his day.

‘Have an antacid,’ Fran said, reaching into her bag to unwrap a foil-covered tablet. ‘This will calm you down.’

‘I’ve been chomping them all night,’ Sid frowned, ‘but I don’t suppose another will do any harm.’

‘Why don’t I order a nice peppermint tea to soothe your tum.’

‘That’s a good idea. I want to feel okay when we sail past Stromboli. I’m looking forward to seeing an active volcano.’

‘Talking of eruptions, ‘Fran whispered, ‘here comes Don.’

‘By heck, Debbie looks the worse for wear,’ Sid observed.

‘Morning all,’ Don said as he strode purposefully to Fran and Sid’s table, ‘is there room for two more?’ Don’s electric blue Lycra sportswear hugged his stomach, emphasising his comfortable relationship with the culinary voyage.

‘Help yourself,’ Sid said and pulled out a chair. ‘Are you all right, Debbie? You look a little bit peaky.’

Debbie wore fluffy slippers and a blanket wrapped around her shoulders, and her hair, generally styled with care, resembled a bird’s nest. As she removed her sunglasses to squint at Sid, he wondered if she’d been in a boxingbout, the dark circles around her eyes giving her a haunted expression and the crumpled pantsuit she wore looking more like rumpled pyjamas.

‘Have some coffee, love,’ Sid said, reaching out to pour Debbie a cup.

‘My wife had a drop too much last night and is paying the price this morning.’ Don frowned at Debbie. ‘I’ve told her that fresh air and a good fry-up will soon buck her up.’

Sid noted that Debbie’s skin had turned the colour of custard. Instead of bucking up, she looked like she was going to throw up.

‘Bit of a tummy upset?’ Fran moved closer to squeeze Debbie’s shoulder. ‘My Sid hasn’t been feeling too well. Perhaps you’ve both eaten something that hasn’t agreed?’

‘More to do with an excess of cocktails and too many tequila shots.’ Don shook his head. ‘I’ve told her that she should have joined me for Kyle’s Sunrise Senior Splashdown. A session of exercise and fresh air would soon sort things out.’

Debbie groaned and, flinging an arm in Don’s direction, swung her hand at his head. But Don, clearly used to ducking and diving, swerved away. Debbie closed her eyes and sipped her coffee, then sucked gratefully on the antacid tablet that Fran had produced.

‘Did you have a late night?’ Sid asked. He noted that Debbie never got a word in edgeways, Don being the undisputed champion of mouthpieces, with a black belt in talking over his wife.

‘Yes, it was in the early hours before I managed to get Debbie safely back to our cabin,’ Don said, picking up a menu. When a server appeared, he ordered breakfast.

‘Fran and I turned in not long after the evening show in the Neptune Theatre,’ Sid said. ‘It was a great night with Melody Moon and theDiamond Stardancers entertaining us with an evening of Broadway hits.’

‘Aye, we caught that too,’ Don acknowledged. ‘Did you stay for Dicky Delaney’s late-night comedy and karaoke?’

‘No, but I’m sure it was good.’

‘It certainly was, with passengers joining in and the best singer turned out to be a welder by day and Neil Diamond by night.’ Don grinned, ‘It was a laugh a minute until Debbie took to the stage for her karaoke version of, “I Will Survive”.’

‘And did she?’ Sid asked.

‘Not for long; she shook her hips so hard we thought she’d dislodged a disc. It took me, Dicky and a stage assistant to lower her back into the audience.’

‘No wonder she needed a drink, poor girl,’ Fran interjected.

‘Oh, that was at the party.’ Don picked up a napkin and tucked it into the edge of his vest. ‘Cocktails flowed like a waterfall.’

‘Party?’ Fran raised her eyebrows.

But before Don had time to answer, Debbie sat up and suddenly changed the subject. ‘What time do we sail by the volcano?’ she asked.

Sid looked at his watch. ‘In a couple of hours, I think.’

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