Page 25 of Written By a Woman

ChapterFive

ZAID

I decidedto consider that awkward interaction with Signe at her desk a success. We chatted, she flirted like she always does, and I did my best to reciprocate professionally, without looking too eager about it.

Regardless, I learned a lot after browsing the internet for anything Signe and her romance novel related, and I learned some things from my research.

Number one, her book was categorized as “open door” and she had already posted some explicit scenes on a free website that romance readers often used. I thought about reading it, but once I realized what I was reading, it almost felt like an invasion of her privacy. So, I decided to skip the more, well, intimate scenes of what she shared with readers.

She and I just weren’t there yet.

Number two, the male lead in her story and I were very different people. Signe may have described Zayne for readers to picture me in their minds. However, our personalities were almost the opposite of each other. Zayne was confident. Flirty. Charismatic. He lit up a room with his presence.

That wasn’t me.

That was more like Signe.

Zayne may have started off shy around the love interest, but he wasn’t afraid of failure or rejection as he pursued Sydney. He was so confident that they were meant to be, that he had no problem respecting Sydney’s boundaries until she was able to come to that conclusion herself.

And that was just what I found on the infuriatingly formatted website Signe had posted on. Who knew how much more developed her characters would be now that she was pursuing traditional publishing and had an agent in the industry supporting her?

After that, I realized that if I wanted to catch the attention of someone like Signe, I needed to take a step out of my comfort zone with her. Signe was social and approachable with everyone. I hadn’t seen hernotsocialize with anyone in the office. It was partly why I never thought too much about gaining her attention, because she gave her attention to everyone who passed by her desk, and I didn’t want to fill my head with delusions that I might have been special.

Now I know, at least, that there is something special about me, even if it just seemed to be my physique. But I couldn’t blame Signe on that, because I hadn’t gone out of my way to always reciprocate her attempts at casual conversation, so I figured I needed to extend a type of olive branch.

One thing I did notice after Nikhil and I started talking about that night’s deployment, was how Signe immediately checked out of the conversation and focused back on her work.

I needed to get better at conversing with her, then.

Practice makes perfect, is what I told myself. I decided that while I was usually busy with meetings and putting out fires, it wouldn’t take too much effort to greet Signe every day. I wanted to get to know her better, and I wanted her to get to know me better. I wanted to start to build a friendship with her so we could both see if a step in the romantic direction seemed possible.

If I was being honest, I was putting quite a bit of hope that Signe would be interested in me romantically as well, and not just as a pretty face to write about. We had our differences, like how she was clearly an extroverted woman who enjoyed trying new things (based on what I could sus out on her social media), whereas I sometimes found myself in a rut of familiarity and routine. I didn’t mind the differences, in fact, I was in awe at how confident and social and simplywarmshe was. I couldn’t think of a single person in the office who might not like Signe as a person.

Whereas, I had let my stress get the best of me at some points, making some sales reps and engineers tiptoe around me for a while.

From what I have heard, and learned on her social media accounts, Signe loved trying new restaurants. Perhaps taking her to my father’s Italian restaurant for a first date wouldn’t be a bad idea, because he only had great reviews for it.

No, then my father would just embarrass me with childhood stories the whole time. That option was out.

But I was getting ahead of myself. I wasn’t sure Signe would even be willing to give me the time of day since she and I were so different.

Something that helped reassure me was that I also knew that Signe was an empathic person by nature. I had seen this empathetic side of her in action several times at the office. A while ago, Jacqueline was having a rough day because someone had unexpectedly quit without giving notice, and she was already someone everyone generally avoided interacting with because of her no-nonsense personality. Signe, however, had left her desk and went to Jacqueline’s office to see how she was doing. I only knew this because as I was passing by Jacqueline’s office on the way to Brandon’s, I could hear Signe patiently listening to all of Jacqueline’s complaints and woes, while also offering to help her out however she could. Even though Signe already had her hands full with her job.

Even though Jacqueline wasn’t well-liked around the office, Signe didn’t care.

Would she share that same attitude while seeking out romantic partners? I wasn’t sure.

Considering this gave me a little bit of hope. A little bit of motivation to push myself and maybe take a tip or two from Zayne. To be a little more confident, a little more outgoing. It was the first time in my adult life I was willing to push myself in this way for the simple possibility of being with a woman like Signe. I was willing to accept how desperate this should have made me look, but I also didn’t care.

“Knock, knock,” I heard Salma’s fake friendly voice from the doorway of my office, and I instinctively looked up at her to give her an annoyed look.

“How can I help—” My sarcastic remark died in my throat when Signe followed Salma in, holding little Zeki in her arms with the brightest grin on his face.

I had to clear my throat to control my emotions at the sight of Signe holding my nephew as if she had held him many times before. His bright blue eyes admiring her, and his cheeks that were slowly losing their baby chubbiness while rocking my sister’s dimples made something tug in my chest.

“Mom wanted me to drop these off for you,” Salma explained, holding up several small lunch-sized containers in her hands, “Mom overheard Ben say that you eat out for lunch most days, and she wanted to help you ‘not waste money’’.”

I was torn between rolling my eyes at my mother’s antics or grinning at the sight of Zeki playing with a lock of Signe’s red hair.