Page 38 of Written By a Woman

I made a mental note to work up the courage to glean the information from Jacqueline, who would definitely know the answers to my questions. Deciding that was my next step, I was finally able to embrace the dreams of the woman who took up all the free space in my mind.

* * *

In the daysthat passed after Salma dropped off my mother’s leftovers for me in the office, Signe would give me a thumbs up every time I walked past her desk. She eventually ended up eating everything, and I took all the dishes home to wash them and return them to my mother.

I reminded my mother that whenever I did eat out for lunch, it was on the company’s dime. And usually some sort of formal business meeting. This dissuaded her from giving me another mountain of leftovers the next time my family and I got together for dinner.

Though a few days ago, Signe happened to ask me one morning if I could send her the recipes of the leftovers she had eaten, so she could try recreating the meals herself.

I shrugged and said I’d ask my mother for it because I was running late that day already and couldn’t stay at her desk to chat, but the reality was that I was thrilled over the fact that Signe loved the homemade Syrian dishes my mother prepared so often. Sometimes the flavors could be strong for those who weren’t Arab, but Signe had downed each one.

However, my thoughts about Signe enjoying my mother’s leftovers were quickly put in the back of my mind, because just a couple of days after watching her latest live stream, the universe gave me a wonderful opportunity to ask Jacqueline the question that would have immediately given me away otherwise.

I had walked in on two employees romantically intertwined in the break room.

Thankfully, Mary and the small blonde woman didn’t notice me, so I forced myself to ignore my surprise and promptly walked right back out. I ended up shutting myself in my office for a couple of hours afterward.

I had seen the two women with Signe before, and I had walked in (eavesdropped) on several, not entirely work-appropriate, conversations with the group. I hadn’t expected them to go as far as to try to swallow each other’s mouths in the office, an action thatdefinitelywasn’t appropriate in the workplace.

I was a little embarrassed, feeling like I had walked in on a private moment between the women, but also pulled myself together enough to remember that we were in the office and that, weirdly, I could use this to my advantage.

I knocked on Jacqueline’s office a couple of hours later, allowing myself entry when she nodded at me and waved me in while she finished typing something on her laptop.

I closed the door most of the way, leaving a small sliver of space open before sitting myself down in one of the chairs across from her desk. Even though there was a large window right next to Jacqueline’s office door, I still understood that there was rarely a reason for a man like me to shut himself completely in a woman’s office.

“How can I help you?” Jacqueline asked, clicking out of her tabs before sitting straighter in her chair and giving me a blank but professional expression.

“I just had a question about, um,” I cleared my throat and tried my best not to rub my neck or give any more nervous cues than necessary, “Our office’s fraternization or relationship policies.”

Jacqueline’s eyes widened at me for a moment, before she masked her expression again and gave me a stiff nod, “What would you like to know?” She followed up her question by reaching for her mouse and clicking on something on her desktop, probably pulling up the policies in question.

“Let’s say, hypothetically speaking,” I cleared my throat again and tried to sit straighter. I was upper management after all, and I wanted to put on a professional front as easily as Jacqueline did, “That two employees wanted to start a romantic relationship,” Jacqueline’s eyebrow twitched upward ever so slightly, making me want to continue forward before she could start scrutinizing me, “First, is that frowned upon? Second, what is the proper procedure for those two employees to establish that relationship while protecting themselves in the workplace?”

Jacqueline’s lips pressed together in a thin line, and she leaned forward on her elbows with a somehow still straight back before tilting her head towards me, “Is there someone you are romantically involved with here, Zaid?”

I could feel the blush hit my face immediately at her forward question, and I gave myself a self-deprecating smile before a nervous chuckle left my mouth and I shook my head, “No, this isn’t about me.” I hesitated for a second before deciding to be as honest as I could with her, “I just happened to notice some, um, romantic behavior occurring between two employees in the break room.”

Her eyebrows immediately pulled down, “Who? What were they doing?” She reached down under her desk and pulled out her iPad, unlocking the device and pulling up the notes app she loved to use.

“I don’t feel comfortable sharing,” I shook my head at her once, “Nothing outwardly inappropriate occurred,” I lied, “But it was obvious to me that the two employees were romantically involved to some degree. I just wanted to make sure there were policies in place where two consenting adults could explore a romantic relationship with each other without the fear of being fired for doing so.”

Jacqueline’s eyes narrowed at me ever so slightly as the corners of her lips turned down, before shaking her head once and setting her iPad on her desk, “If two employees want to start a romantic relationship, I would encourage them to visit me and document it. That protects both of them as the employees, as well as us as a company,” I nodded at her explanation, “There would only be a problem if one of them was in a superior position over the other.”

I felt something sink in my gut at her words, “I don’t think that’s the case, because they’re on different teams.” I lifted a shoulder.

“That’s good to know,” Jacqueline nodded, “However, let’s say we had an intern on one of the sales teams who was fraternizing with a manager in engineering. That still consists of a complex power dynamic, because even though they’re on different teams, one employee is clearly in a position of power over the other. Does that make sense?”

I felt the thing that sunk in my gut settle hard, reminding me just how inappropriate my feelings for Signe were.

“I think so,” I nodded, and because I hated myself, I played along with her scenario just to let her know I understood her loud and clear, “So, someone like me in an upper management position would still be in a position of power over someone like Frank,” I lifted a shoulder at the mention of one of the sales reps that often reminded me of Jacqueline’s twin, personality-wise, “Which would create an unfair power dynamic, even though we’re two different departments.”

“Exactly,” Jacqueline nodded, “If you and Frank ever started a romantic relationship, of course, I would want you both to come to me and document it. However, even though I couldn’t stop two consenting adults, I would also strongly encourage the two of you to not cross that boundary in the first place.”

I nodded, “That makes sense.”

“There are seven point five billion people in the world,” Jacqueline lifted a shoulder, looking more casual than I had ever seen her be, “Therefore, there is almost no reason to get involved with someone at work.”

I smiled at her, “I understand. However, in the case of the two employees I mentioned earlier, I don’t think there will be any problem with power dynamics.” Unless of course, Nikhil promotes Mary like he planned to. I knew Jacqueline had already started the formal paperwork for the offer.

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