Page 79 of Written By a Woman

Heat rushed through my core, snapping a string that was tightening inside and releasing fiery pleasure behind my eyes, before I miraculously managed to breathe out, “God, Zaid.”

“Good, just like that,” Zaid kept his finger steady, never once changing the pressure or pace as my orgasm rolled through me, a second overwhelming wave coating my body at his praise. I felt my grip on his hair tighten as I moaned through the orgasm, stars spinning in the peripherals of my vision because he just wasn’t letting up on me.

“Okay,” I gasped, using my grip on his hair to get him to let up on my breasts, “I can’t—no more.” I was barely able to get the words out, and when Zaid lifted his head to gaze at me, air escaped my lungs again at the sight of him. His flushed face, his mussed-up hair, and the lazy grin he gave me before leaning forward and kissing my lips again.

He was like the human embodiment of my personalized aphrodisiac. I had just orgasmed harder than I had in a long while, and yet I still found myself tucking my fingers into the waistband of his sweatpants, searching.

Zaid groaned on top of me before shifting his weight and wrapping his hand around mine to remove it from his waistband. Then I found my hand pinned to the mattress on the side of my head.

“Sorry,” I mumbled against his deep kisses, “Do you want—”

“I’m okay,” Zaid mumbled, his tongue dragging against mine, “I’m okay.”

“I want to,” I turned my head just enough to speak, but he didn’t stop kissing me. He brushed his lips against my cheek, my jaw, my ear, “I want to make you feel good.”

“I know,” I could feel his lips curl into a smile against the shell of my ear, and I shivered from the contact, “I’d like to have something to look forward to.”

I sighed as his lips started to drag themselves back towards mine, and I allowed one more, deep, drugging kiss from him before I voiced the worry that was tingling in the back of my mind, “This wasn’t a one-time thing?” Why did I sound so insecure? If it was a one-time thing, I would respect Zaid’s decision, put on my big girl pants, and deal with it.

But I didn’t want it to be a one-time thing.

I had just barely gotten a taste of what our chemistry was like, and I was nowhere close to finished with him.

“No,” Zaid sounded a little dangerous as he replied, his grip on my hand tightening as he nipped at my bottom lip just like I had done to him earlier, “I don’t do casual hook-ups, Signe.” He released his hold on my hand to cup my cheek, his thumb brushing against my jawbone as he leaned back to meet my gaze, “This means something to me, I hope it does for you, too.”

I felt myself bite my lip under his intense gaze. The fluttering that was taking place in both my heart and my stomach at his words was nauseating in the best way. Zaid had just given me a toe-curling orgasm, and now he was telling me that he didn’t do casual. As someone who had only done casual the last few years, I couldn’t deny the giddiness that unfolded in me at the mere thought of someone being interested in me beyond sex.

“I think this might mean something to me, too,” I whispered, taking in his masculine features in the lamplight of the hotel room, “But…are we allowed?” Maybe it was because I had just experienced a mind-blowing orgasm, but my anxiety and breathing were much more regulated now than it was before Zaid and I kissed.

“Allowed?” Zaid asked, pressing his lips against my cheek once more before pulling back again. It was as if he couldn’t help it. Like he had to keep kissing me. Once that dam between us broke, there was no going back.

“Like…because of work?” I pressed my lips together nervously. He was my superior, which usually came with a ton of complications. However, I wasn’t concerned with Zaid’s position at the company. If everything went well, I wouldn’t be working there too much longer anyway.

Oh frick…

What the fuck is wrong with you, Signe? Do you think he’d be interested in this if he knew all the filthy things you’ve written about Zayne?

I was quite literally just about to tell him about my book, but now I knew what his lips tasted like. What his hands felt like, and how loving his touch was. But…he and I were just starting something. Something that I hadn’t ever let myself daydream too much about, because the disappointment of not having this with him was too much to bear.

It was still new. Minutes old.

As wonderful as this was, it was still too soon to know if this could turn into a serious, long-term relationship. Even if Zaid “doesn’t do casual”. Plus, there is still the possibility that now, if he found out about the book, he wouldn’t be interested in this between us anymore.

And if anyone else at work found out what I wrote about him, especially if he was turned off and not interested in me anymore, it’s not unrealistic to expect me to lose my job over it. Following that logic, while still being wrapped up in Zaid, I figured it would be better to wait until Michelle has sent the manuscript through the first round of submissions to publishers in a few weeks. Depending on how that is looking, I could start looking for other part-time work and quit Sun Steer whether I was still involved with Zaid or not.

If all of that lined up, and Zaid and I were getting serious, I was convinced thatthatwould be a better time to tell him about the book.

“It’s not against the rules for us to explore this, no,” Zaid shook his head once, his hand on my jaw dragging down towards my neck so that his thumb could brush against my collarbone, “I also don’t consider it anyone’s business but ours.”

I felt my smile become wobbly, knowing I was still recovering from the high of Zaid’s magical lips and fingers.

“That being said,” Zaid’s eyes were focused on his finger’s path as he spoke, “If you want to disclose this to Jacqueline, I wouldn’t be against it. For your safety, I mean.”

“What aboutyoursafety?” I asked, my head spinning with the horror of having to sit down in Jacqueline’s office and let her know that the CTO and I were hooking up.

No, not hooking up.

Exploring this.

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