Prologue
JACQUELINE: MANY MONTHS EARLIER
My name is Jacqueline Williams,and I was going to have a one-night stand.
Iwanteda one-night stand, which was the most important thing.
I was a warm-blooded woman who enjoyed the consensual touch of someone who desired me.
Other women did this all the time, I wasn’t special for trying this out.
“Who are you staring at?” My brother, Marco, asked as he brought his cheek against mine to see where my gaze landed.
“Him,” I replied with a nod. My nerves were skittering in my veins from simply acknowledging who my attention was focused on.
“Oh, good choice.” Marco nodded in approval. As twins, we were close. As a gay man and straight woman, we were even closer than normal. Talking about boys was something we did as early as teenagers before he officially came out to our father.
Since coming out, Marco had found his confidence.
Whereas, I still hadn’t.
“Thanks,” I grinned, looking back and rubbing my sweaty palms on my skater skirt. I felt like a fraud. Like I wasn’t dressed like the thirty-year-old woman I was. Was I even allowed to dress sexy? I desperately wanted to. Something about slacks, pencil skirts, and business casual just got old.
“What are you going to do?” Marco asked. He sipped from his old-fashioned as he stared at the back of the man’s head. He sat at the bar, so I couldn’t see his face entirely. I had caught glimpses of his profile in the hour we had been sitting here scoping out possibilities for a no-strings-attached hookup. His back looked handsome, though. He wore a black leather jacket with dark jeans. I also decided on him because he looked about my age, which was difficult to find here. Either it was all college-looking students (hard pass) or much older men (hard pass).
“I’m not sure yet,” I said, pressing my lips flat together, trying to channel even a fraction of the confidence Marco had shown before approaching the dark-haired man at the bar. “Do you have any pro tips?”
“None that would apply to you,” Marco quipped, giving me raised eyebrows when I frowned at him in disappointment, “Gay men are very direct. Very little talking takes place. Dating apps have ruined basic communication skills.”
I sighed, determined to see this through even if my brother did not help me.
“What if I just ask for his name? A fun fact?” Most of my social skills consisted of what a professional like me would say to employees. I hadn’t had a casual, outside-of-work, flirty conversation with a man in a very long time.
“His name is not a bad start, but a fun fact feels like an interview,” Marco raised one perfectly manicured dark eyebrow at me, “While you are technically interviewing him to ensure he qualifies for entry under your skirt, you don’t want to make him feel like he’sinan interview.”
I nodded, trying to seem more…chill.
“How about—”
“How about you start by walking up there and sitting on the empty stool next to him?” Marco emphasized his advice with a dramatic shove, making me almost fall out of my seat in our booth.
“Okay!” I whisper-hissed as I shoved him away from me and fixed my skirt to ensure no part of my butt was falling out of it. I brushed my hands over my top to flatten any wrinkles. I wore a long-sleeved crop top, just enough crop to show an inch of skin on my waist. Nothing dramatic. The high-waisted flare skirt I wore helped me feel more comfortable with the look. The neckline was square and much lower than I normally wore, but I was both excited and nervous about dressing so provocatively with intention.
This was about taking charge of my sexuality.
About me practicing confidence.
“Just remember,” Marco grabbed my wrist before I turned around to make it over to the handsome stranger I hoped to seduce tonight, “Youare the catch. He’s the one who should be lucky and grateful to have an opportunity to touchyou. If he isn’t interested, it is his loss.”
I gave my twin a nervous smile and nodded. Then, standing straight, I took a deep breath to steady myself.
I was the catch.
I had worth, and value, outside of looks and confidence, and sexual experience.
“Go get ‘em,” Marco released my wrist and nodded to encourage me to get a move on, “I’ll be keeping an eye out in case you need help.”
I exhaled a nervous breath before tucking my loose hair behind my ears. I usually wore my hair up for work because it was one less thing to worry about during the busy workday. Having it down and styled in loose waves was outside of my comfort zone but in a good way. I forgot how nice my brown hair looked. How I had natural highlights from the near-constant sun exposure living in southern California.