Elliot shrugs, his gaze drifting off into the distance. “I was young and dumb and thought I was in love. But Liam was always more focused on hockey than on me. He’d cancel dates at the lastminute, and I always felt like I was playing second fiddle to his sport.”
I nod in understanding. I know all too well how consuming hockey can be. How easy it is to let it take over your life if you’re not careful. “I’m sorry, Elliot. That must have been tough.”
“It was at first. But then I got over it and vowed never to date a hockey player for as long as I shall live. And then you came along.”
A cocky grin that spreads across my face at Elliot’s words. “Well, well, well. Guess I’m just too irresistible for you to keep that vow, huh? The Gunnarson charm strikes again.”
I give an exaggerated wink, and Elliot rolls his eyes. “Don’t let it go to your head, hotshot. I’m making an exception for you. Don’t make me regret it.”
“Oh, I would never dream of it.” I place my hand over my heart. “I am honored and humbled that you have deemed me worthy of breaking your sacred pledge. I shall endeavor to prove myself deserving of such an esteemed position.”
“Wow. Those are big words coming from you.”
“You know what else is big coming from me?”
Elliot howls. “Oh my God, Gerard. You are ridiculous.”
“Ridiculously charming, you mean.”
We resume walking, our joined hands swinging between us. The cool night air is refreshing against my skin, and the scent of freshly cut grass fills my nostrils. It’s a perfect evening, made even more perfect by the amazing man at my side.
“So, what about you?” Elliot asks after a moment. “Any ex-girlfriends in your past I should know about?”
I shake my head. “Nah, not really. I mean, I dated a few girls in high school, but it was never anything serious. Just typical teenage stuff. Movies, dances, awkward make-out sessions in the back of my car. But there was never…a spark. Never that feeling of clicking with someone on every level.”
It’s the truth. Yes, I’ve found girls attractive and enjoyed their company, but ultimately, my true love has always been the ice.
Until now.
Elliot is different. He makes me feel things like never before. He challenges, intrigues, and captivates me in a way no one ever has. And with a bone-deep certainty, I know that what we have is special. Thatheis special.
“What about…” Elliot hesitates, and I squeeze his hand, letting him know he can ask me whatever he wants. “What about sex? Have you ever, you know…gone all the way with anyone?”
I rub the back of my neck with my free hand and blush. “Ah, no. I haven’t. You’re the first person to ever touch me.”
There. I said it. My deepest, darkest secret laid bare for him to see. I hold my breath, waiting for his reaction.
“Wait, seriously?” His eyes widen in shock. “But you’re…you’re Gerard Gunnarson! Hockey superstar! Campus heartthrob! I’ve always assumed you’d been intimate with someone at some point before I met you.”
I chuckle nervously. “I mean, I’ve had plenty of opportunities. I’ve lost count of how many girls have made it clear they wanted to, uh, get down and dirty with me.”
“And you never took them up on it?”
I shake my head. “Nah. I don’t know. It just never felt right. I got hard making out with them, of course—I’m only human, after all. But whenever they reached for my boner, I stopped them.”
“Really? Why?”
I take a deep breath and try to find the right words to explain the complex mess of emotions swirling inside me. “I guess I never wanted to do it with someone I wasn’t that into. Sex is a big deal to me. Call me old-fashioned, but I want my first time to be with someone special. Someone I have a real connection with. Not a girl who will break up with me after she gets what she came for.”
Elliot peers up at me with wide eyes. “So, then, why with me?”
“You’re smart, you’re funny, you’re kind. You see the real me—not just the hockey player or the popular guy, but the dorky,pun-loving goofball who geeks out over rom-coms with his little sister.” I step closer and cup his face with my free hand. “When I’m with you, it’s like coming home. I can finally breathe and be myself.”
Elliot’s eyes shimmer with unshed tears. “Gerard…”
“I want you, Elliot. All of you. Your mind, your heart, your body. I want to share myself with you in every way possible. Because you’re not just anyone to me. You’re…everything.”
A single tear slips down Elliot’s cheek, and I gently brush it away with my thumb. He leans into my touch, nuzzling his face into my palm. “I want you too. So much. You have no idea.”