Page 52 of Icing on the Cake

He nods, running a hand through his wet hair. “School has never been my strong suit. I struggle with a lot of the concepts, and it takes me longer to grasp things than it does for most people.”

“But you’re a star hockey player,” I point out. “That has to count for something.”

Gerard shrugs. “It does, but it’s not everything. I’ve had to work my butt off to get to where I am today—both on and off the ice. And even now, I still have moments where I wonder if I’mgood enough.”

I nod slowly, starting to understand. “How do you deal with it, then? The self-doubt, I mean.”

“I try to focus on the things I’m good at, like hockey. When I’m on the ice, everything else fades away. It’s just me, my teammates, and the puck. In those moments, Iaminvincible.”

“And when you’re not playing hockey? How do you cope then?”

Gerard takes a deep breath. “I dunno. I’m constantly trying to keep my head above water.”

“I can relate to that.”

“But I’ve learned it’s okay to ask for help from my teammates, coaches, or even a friend.” Gerard continues. “I don’t have to do everything on my own.”

“That’s a good mindset to have.” I must say, I’m impressed by his self-awareness.

“It took me a long time to get there,” he admits. “I used to think that asking for help was a sign of weakness. That I had to be strong all the time, no matter what. But that’s not realistic. Everyone needs support sometimes.”

I nod, feeling a newfound respect for the gentle giant. It’s easy to assume that Gerard has it all together, but the reality is far more complex.

“How did you end up building your confidence? Was it a matter of time and experience?”

Gerard considers the question for a moment. “Yes and no. It was a conscious effort on my part. I stopped comparing myself to others. Stopped thinking that because someone else is better at something, I must be a failure.”

“That makes sense.”

“I also started practicing self-compassion. Instead of beating myself up over every little mistake, I’ve tried treating myself with kindness and understanding. If I have a bad game or bomb a test, I remind myself that having off days isn’t the worst thing in the world.”

I nod. “I could probably stand to work on that myself.”

“It’s a process.” Gerard gives me an encouraging smile. “But it’s worth it. When you treat yourself with compassion, it’s amazing how much your confidence and well-being improve.”

I let his words sink in. It’s strange to think that a guy I assumed was all brawn and no brains is actually quite wise and introspective.

Gerard shakes his head to clear his thoughts. “Anyway, enough about me. What errand are you running in this lovely weather?”

I grimace, remembering my original mission. “I’m running an errand for Jackson. He’s stuck at the gym without an umbrella. So, I’m bringing him one.”

“Ah, that explains the pink umbrella, then.”

“It’s Sarah’s. She didn’t have anything more…masculine on hand.”

“Hey, real men wear pink,” Gerard declares with a grin while gesturing down at his feet, which are clad in another pair of pink socks. I wonder if they’re the same ones as that day in the library or if he has a collection of them. “But seriously, it’s nice of you to trek across campus in bad weather for a friend.”

“Jackson would do the same for me.”

Gerard’s nose scrunches as he smiles. “Mind if I walk with you?”

Not at all.“Oh, uh, sure. I mean, if you want to.”

“I do.” His voice is warm and sincere. “Besides, it’s not every day I get to rescue a damsel in distress.”

I snort. “I’m hardly a damsel.”

“Fine, a dude in distress then.” Gerard falls into step beside me and plucks my umbrella from my grip. He holds it high above my head, effectively shielding me from the worst of the downpour.

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