Page 49 of Welcome to the Cornish Country Hospital

‘I’m not besotted with Lucas; I can’t stand him after what he’s done to you.’ Danni tried to lean forward across the table, but Esther recoiled, pressing her body as far into the seat opposite as she physically could.

‘Oh come on! Do you think I’m blind? I’ve had to witness the way you are around him ever since we started dating. Trying to create your in-jokes that leave me out, and the way you stare at him when you think I’m not looking. Lucas used to joke about it and the fact he wouldn’t have to look far for a rebound fling if I ever left him. But he was embarrassed by it, and all this time I’ve made excuses for you and tried to pretend to myself that it wasn’t true.’ Esther choked on her words. ‘I used to worry that you’d outgrow our friendship and I was so relieved when you didn’t. Now I’ll never know if it really mattered to you at all, or if you were just staying friends with me to get close to Lucas.’

‘It’s because of how much I love you that I never tried to get closer to him than I already was.’ Danni’s throat was burning. She understood why her friend was angry, but the fact that she was still being manipulated by Lucas made her want to scream. It had taken Danni a long time to work out who the real Lucas was, and she was terrified that Esther might not see it before it was too late.

‘Well, thanks very much, you clearly deserve a reward, because according to you the only reason I still have a fiancé is because you didn’t snap your fingers and send him running to you instead.’ Esther was losing control of her calm now and Danni regretted suggesting they meet somewhere so public. She’d chosen the pub in the hope it would force Esther to listen and that, in turn, it would help her see the truth, rather than just flying off the handle. But Esther was only human and she was reacting in a very human way to something she didn’t want to hear.

‘That’s not what I said.’ Danni was almost whispering now, hoping it might make Esther lower her voice too. ‘Okay, I’ll admit that for a long time I thought I was in love with Lucas, but I always loved you more. And even when there were times when I know my friendship with Lucas could have crossed the line into something more, I’d never have done it, because losing you would be the worst thing that could happen to me. But the other girls don’t have any loyalty to you and I’ve witnessed him blurring those lines with people at work for a long time. It’s only now I realise just how far he takes it.’

‘There are no other girls, only you and this deluded fantasy you’ve got that Lucas returns your feelings. He doesn’t; he loves me. Only me!’ Esther’s eyes were wild and Danni was vaguely aware that the people around them had stopped doing anything other than watching them.

‘Believe what you want about me. I’d rather that than watch you go into this marriage with a man who came to me and told me he had doubts about marrying you, that he wasn’t sure he loved you enough. He even gave that as an excuse for creating an online dating profile. He wanted to risk everything to test how much he loved you.’

‘You’re lying.’ Esther shook her head; the look of desolation on her face was so painful to witness, but Danni was clinging to a shred of hope that it might mean that part of Esther believed her, deep down.

‘I wish I was. But you’ve got to trust me: don’t go through with this wedding; you deserve so much more.’

‘Stop it! Just stop it!’ The anger was back and Esther got to her feet, downing the rest of her wine in one and reaching into her bag before throwing a ten-pound note on the table. ‘Nothing you say is going to stop me from marrying Lucas. It wouldn’t get you what you want, even if I called the wedding off. He doesn’t love you and he never will. I don’t want anything from you any more. Stay away from me, and from us. Just get your own life, Danielle. It’s about time you did.’

‘Esther, don’t, please!’ Danni called after her, but she didn’t turn around. There was nothing else she could have said, even if Esther had been willing to listen. Everything was out in the open now and, just as she’d feared, her friendship with Esther seemed likely to be the only casualty.

All Danni could do was cling to what she’d said to Charlie about love being selfless, but that didn’t stop the tears that had been choking in her throat suddenly erupting into noisy sobs. And she couldn’t care less how many people were looking at her as she stumbled out of the pub and into a life without Esther in it.

26

Every time Danni’s phone pinged, her heart started racing, hoping it would be a message from Esther, saying that she’d thought about everything that had been said and had realised that Danni was telling the truth. But there’d been nothing from her and all Danni’s messages to Esther had gone unread. There was one message from Lucas, though.

I warned you how things would turn out if you went around spreading your lies. Now I’m going to make sure everyone at the hospital knows exactly what you’re like. Trying to ruin people’s lives when you don’t get what you want. Nobody wants to work with a stalker.

The words had had the effect on her that Lucas had no doubt banked on. She’d been terrified that she’d need to leave St Piran’s to get over her feelings for him and, even now that she hated his guts, he’d still found a way of making sure she had to leave.

‘Are you okay? You look miles away.’ When Charlie touched her on the shoulder, she jumped. Despite the fact that they’d only known each other a few weeks, he always seemed to be able to tell when something was on her mind. But she couldn’t talk to him about this.

‘Sorry, I was just thinking about something.’ Not even Charlie’s offer to go down and see if they could see Trevor had managed to take her mind off things. There was no relief from the constant loop playing in her head, of things she wished she could have said and done differently over the years.

‘You look exhausted, and I bet you haven’t been eating properly if work has been crazy again. If you don’t want to walk for long, we can go back to my place, and I can make you something to eat. You don’t even have to talk if you’re tired. We can take a leaf out of Brenda and Maggie’s book, and just lie about, doing nothing.’

‘Thanks, but let’s go and see if we can find Trevor first. I could really do with seeing his sweet little face.’ Maggie and Brenda were already heading down the slope of the cliff to the lowest point. It was getting cooler and the strength of the breeze would have been reason enough alone for Danni to quicken her pace. But the truth was she was desperate to see the seal pup and find something to make her smile in the middle of the absolute disaster she’d made of her life.

‘Whatever you want to do is fine with me.’ Charlie walked alongside her in companionable silence, their hands almost touching, and she longed to reach out for that connection to someone she cared about. She’d even called her brother, Joe, leaving a horribly garbled message for him when he hadn’t answered. But dragging Charlie into the middle of this felt like it would sully whatever it was they had, even if that would be over soon too. She really liked him, maybe even more than that, and she got the sense that the feeling was mutual, but it probably wouldn’t be if he found out what she’d done.

‘I think I can see him.’ Charlie pointed to the same outcrop of rocks where they’d first spotted the seal pup.

‘He’s getting so much bigger every time.’ Tears were blurring Danni’s eyes again at the thought that the seal would soon have lost all of the features that made him so distinctively a pup. Her emotions were dangerously close to the surface, and she wasn’t sure how long she’d be able to keep convincing Charlie that she was just overtired from work. It turned out she hadn’t even made it as far as getting back to the cottage.

‘Okay. Something’s wrong and I don’t think it’s work. You don’t have to tell me, but you do have to let me do this.’ Charlie wrapped his arms around her and gave her a hug. Other than Esther, he was the only person who seemed capable of understanding when she needed to talk and when she didn’t, and somehow reacting with just the right response either way. Burying her face against his chest, she contemplated whether there was any way she might be able to ride this out until he left. All she had to do was bottle up her feelings for a bit longer; she ought to be an expert on that by now after all. But it wasn’t that easy with Charlie, because it turned out he’d listened to everything she’d said.

‘Is this about Esther? Did you tell her about Lucas?’

‘I had to. I couldn’t let her go through with the wedding without knowing the truth about him.’ She could barely get the words out and she still couldn’t look at Charlie, but he was holding her tight and somehow making it possible to believe that things might actually turn out okay.

‘For what it’s worth, I think you did the right thing. I know I said before that it’s safer to stay out of it, but she’s your best friend and you’d never have forgiven yourself if he’d ended up ruining her life.’

‘But now I’m the one who’s ruined it. She won’t even read my messages any more.’ She finally managed to look up at Charlie as she drew back a little, but he was shaking his head.

‘She might feel like shooting the messenger at the moment, but just give it time. She’ll realise eventually that this is all down to him.’

‘You wouldn’t say that if you knew—’ She couldn’t even finish the sentence.

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