Page 67 of Small Sacrifices

"Mom—" he tries to answer, only to discover she isn't done yet.

"You know you've never been good at judging people. I know you want to see the best in them, but sometimes, that's just not justified. You can't believe everyone. And I don't think you should believe Governor Mackenzie, sweetheart. Your father agrees with me," she adds, like that's what'll finally convince Reid.

Heart pounding, Reid looks down at the phone in his lap. She's right. She usually is. But that doesn't mean her words cut any less deeply.Fuck.Why is it that she always has to say these truths in the worst way possible? Not an ounce of tact in her, and she wonders where Reid gets it.

It takes Reid a moment to gather his wits and be sure his voice won't shake when he answers her. "I think it's too early to judge. This isn't… I don't like it either, okay? But I did my research on him. Even if it's true, this isn't something anyone could have seen coming."

That's good, right? Not too committal. And he's sticking to his guns. One of these days, they're finally going to see him as a capable adult. Until then, he just has to stay calm and persevere.

"I would have seen it coming," his mother insists on the other end of the line, oblivious to how tightly Reid's teeth are clenched already. "You should have come to us for help. Your father and me, we're better at recognizing these things. Remember when…"

And she's off on yet another anecdote about a time Reid got duped by a kid at school who pretended he was his friend so that he could steal his meds. A kid who his mother, when she first met him, described as: "Just the nicest young man."

Reid breathes through it. He tells himself it's fine. It's always been obvious that he has social deficits in some areas. That's fine. He knows where his blind spots are and how to best work around them so he doesn't miss anything. Except, he did miss something this time. Something massive.

For a second, he thinks that maybe his mother is right. Maybe other people can tell from a mile off. It would be just like Reid to be the last one in on the secret that the governor of California would knowingly let children play in a poisoned schoolyard.Just don't build a playground on it.But if that were true, he wouldn't have won the election by such a large margin.

His mother, done reminiscing, is back to the subject. "You're really lucky you're not in a more public role, you know? Just imagine, what if you had to step in front of the cameras and defend that man, and it turned out to all be lies? That'd be your reputation ruined, too. Yourname."

She says it like that's the worst thing that could happen. "Maybe you really should do the marketing for Becky's boutique. She's not nearly as scandal prone. You could try it for a few weeks—who knows, you might like it!"

"Mom, please." Reid buries his head in his hands. "I can make my own decisions. I madethisdecision. If it turns out to have been the wrong one, I'm going to figure out how to deal with that. If I can't, I'll ask for help. You said I had a year."

His mother sighs. "Yes, but sweetheart—"

"Then please let me try this. I'll never be independent if I rely on you for every single decision. That's not how that works."

"I just worry, darling."

Yeah, so does Reid. About a whole bunch of things, but mostly about one particular question: What if he's wrong? What if this is so bad that he won't be able to recover on his own? If all of this comes to light, who's going to want Reid to work for them when this is his only experience? That can't look good.

He steers the conversation into calmer waters after that, but his mother can tell he's distracted. In a rare show of empathy, she lets him go without even dragging his father into the conversation to say goodnight.

Despite how tired Reid is, he doesn't fall asleep for a long while. There's just too much on his mind. Once his thoughts are finally done circling about how all of this could possibly end well for him, they jump to Everett and then back again.

Chapter 23: Developments

The next few days are interesting. He doesn't see Everett, but that doesn't mean that they don't talk. Because Everett just. Won't. Stop. Texting.

It's completely out of nowhere most of the time.

i feel like ud be the type of guy to set nice music as his alarm. not me. it has to be the most hideous sound or i wont wake up. and then i hate my life for at least ten mins after that.

Then, later that day:

hey how much do u know about nail polish? apparently my knowledge is 'insufficient'.

actual quote here. Max is savage.

Reid keeps giggling to himself at his desk, so Marisol keeps teasing him. It's a pleasant distraction from what he feels he should be thinking about. Because Marisol still hasn't figured out who to talk to about his discovery, which means that he can'tdo anything.

Robin Greene's death isn't in the news anymore. His name was mentioned over the weekend, but now he's relegated to"and one child has died from health complications."Reid wouldn't know what to think about that—except Ms. Greene hasn't blocked his private Instagram account, so he can see the pictures she posts and read the captions she writes. Shewantspeople to talk about him, to say his name. And so that's what Reid wants, too. But the news has moved on from Robin.

They haven't moved on from showing clips of that speech Clarice Coleman gave, calling for criminal prosecution of Agrifarm executives. That's something, at least. It calms him a bit to know that there's one person in this office publicly demanding justice. In dark moments, he wonders if she might be in on it, too, and is just hiding it better. He can't imagine it, but he couldn't have imagined it of Mackenzie either.

It's also getting more difficult to trust the governor's colleagues, because in their attempts to defend him, they're resorting to increasingly disgusting arguments.At least he isn't a Republican. At least he isn't trying to restrict reproductive freedoms. And, hell, it was an accident. The governor will learn from it. Sacrifices have to be made.

Reid wants to scream. Beyond calling a child's death a sacrifice—how is itsmall?He makes a note of the people arguing like that and hopes he never has to vote for them. And he wonders, in a dark corner of his mind, if anyone will ever find out just how much the governor was involved in this, ifthose emails never get leaked. Every day, he feels more like an accomplice by not telling people what he knows.

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