* * *
Anoushka foundKitty taking down washing from the line in the back garden of Oak Tree Farm.
‘Hi, Mum.’
Kitty turned, surprised. ‘Oh, hi, lovey!’ She paused, a pair of jeans in her hands, her brows drawing together. ‘Everything okay?’
Anoushka nodded, swallowing down the emotions that had suddenly rushed to the surface. ‘Need a hand?’ She started unpegging the washing, throwing it into the basket, aware of her step-mum watching her.
‘Er… yes, thanks, that’d be good. I’ll have to bring it in now the smell of slurry’s in the air, it’ll make everything stink otherwise. I’ll pop it on the clothes airer in the kitchen, it’ll be all right there.’ Kitty folded the jeans, concerned eyes on her stepdaughter. ‘You sure everything’s all right, chick?’
Anoushka sucked in a breath, her bottom lip wobbling. ‘It’s over, Mum. Me and Damon… I’ve broken up with him.’ A tear plopped onto her cheek and made its way slowly down to her chin. She brushed it away.
‘Oh, sweetheart, come here.’ Kitty dropped the jeans into the washing basket and wrapped her arms around Anoushka, squeezing her tight. In the warm embrace, Anoushka let the tears flow.
‘I don’t know why I’m crying; I feel so much better for breaking up with him. It’s just…’
‘I know, it’ll be the relief, my love. I remember feeling that way when I knew it was finally over with me and Dan.’ Kitty pressed a kiss into Anoushka’s hair. ‘But you’ll feel better soon, I promise.’
Anoushka raised her head, her face flushed with tears. She sniffed, wiping under her nose with the back of her hand. ‘Yeah. The relief’s enormous; I don’t regret it for a minute.’
‘Good.’ Kitty smiled, giving Anoushka’s arms a rub. ‘Tell you what, how about I make us a killer hot chocolate? I’m talking mini-marshmallows, grated chocolate, whipped cream and a great big chocolate flake. The works. The perfect remedy for sore hearts in my book. And there’s some shortbread cooling in the kitchen, it’ll be perfect for dunking. Complete sugar overload. Sound good? Oh, and in case you don’t know, calories don’t count on a Saturday afternoon.’ Kitty grinned, giving Anoushka a playful nudge with her elbow.
‘Sounds perfect,’ Anoushka said with a snotty laugh, nudging her step-mum back.
The kitchen was filled with the comforting aroma of home-baking, which had the almost immediate effect of bringing Anoushka’s tension levels right down. She pulled out a chair at the table, watching while Kitty got to work on the hot chocolate, filling a pan with milk and setting it on the Aga hotplate. It dawned on her the house was quiet and there was no sign of the dogs, which was unusual since both kids and dogs would usually loiter in the kitchen expectantly when Kitty had been baking.
‘Where is everyone?’
‘Your dad’s taken the kids and the hounds to the beach over at Micklewick Bay so we’ve got the house to ourselves.’
‘Oh, yeah, course.’ She vaguely remembered her dad saying something about a trip to the beach that afternoon. She smiled, remembering how excited she used to get at the prospect of a visit to the seaside.
It wasn’t long before the delicious scent of chocolate joined that of the shortbread and before she knew it, Kitty had placed a chunky mug of chocolatey deliciousness in front of her, tiny marshmallows spilling onto the table. ‘There you go, flower’ she said, sliding a plate with chocolate flakes and shortbread towards her. ‘Tuck in.’
‘Thanks, Mum.’
The pair sat in silence, Kitty nibbling on a slice of buttery shortbread, Anoushka absently popping marshmallows into her mouth.
Kitty was the first to speak. ‘I’ll understand if you don’t want to talk about it – and I’m certainly not pushing you – but I want you to know that I’m here and happy to listen if or whenever you feel the need to. And I won’t judge you; none of us will.’ Kitty reached across and squeezed Anoushka’s hand.
Anoushka looked up, meeting the gaze of those gentle, kind eyes. She felt a sudden rush of love for this warm-hearted woman she was able to call her mum. Looking at the cheerful person Kitty was today, it was hard to believe she’d experienced such dreadful psychological bullying at the hands of Dan Bennet; that she’d been able to move on and build a happy life for herself, and Lucas and Lily. On the outside, Kitty was soft and gentle, but Anoushka guessed she must have a hidden, inner strength for her to have been able to leave such a man. She had to have. Lord knows, she’d found it hard enough to break away from Damon, and he hadn’t been half as bad as Dan Bennet. The feeling of love suddenly turned to anger at what Dan must have doled out to Kitty throughout their marriage; Anoushka was aware she didn’t know the half of it. Her step-mum may be oblivious to the fact, but she’d been a bastion of hope to Anoushka on more than one occasion towards the end of her relationship with Damon.
‘Thanks, Mum.’ She squeezed Kitty’s hand back, recalling how she’d bitten her head off just the other night, telling her to keep her nose out and that her opinion wasn’t welcome. She cringed at the memory. ‘But, first off, I want to apologise for how I’ve been over the last few months. I know I’ve been defensive and moody and difficult at times. It must’ve—’
‘There’s no need to apologise, lovey. I totally understand. Your dad and me, well, to be completely honest, we’ve been worried about you. We knew things weren’t right, and, I mean, with Damon not wanting to even come into the house… well… it’s not as if we’ve ever been unpleasant to him; we always tried to make him feel welcome.’ She heaved a sigh. ‘I’m just relieved it’s over; your dad will be too.’
Anoushka winced. ‘I know, there was no excuse for Damon’s behaviour, I can see that now; I could at the time, actually, but just kept telling myself he wasn’t being rude, that it must’ve been me doing something to make him act that way. Burying my head in the sand, I suppose. I took my frustration out on you and Dad and neither of you deserved it. I’m sorry, Mum.’
‘Hey, no more apologies, Noushka. Okay?’
‘Okay.’
‘Hopefully you can now see how Damon’s behaviour is classic gaslighting; making you feel like you were in the wrong. I know exactly how men like him operate.’ Kitty’s face darkened. ‘You’ve no need to explain his actions to me, and you don’t need to beat yourself up over being upset about him; you’d been with him a good while and you can’t turn your feelings on and off like a tap. It was exactly the same for me with Dan. And even though your dad and me don’t know all of the details of what happened in your relationship with Damon, we could see just what a negative influence he was having on you. Honestly, chick, we’ve been so worried about you; it was the same for my family when I was with Dan – our Jimby was ready to throttle him. It takes a while for you to see it for yourself. And I can say categorically, that for both of us, breaking up with such controlling bullies – which is exactly what they are – was the right thing to do.’
‘I know, and I hate the thought of you going through what you did.’
‘Don’t worry about me, that’s well and truly in the past now. It was how he was affecting Lukes and Lils that gave me the motivation I needed to get away. But look at us now. We’ve never been as happy as we are with you and your dad. Not forgetting how blessed we’ve been with little Lottie.’ She gave a broad smile that stretched all the way to her eyes.