Page 61 of Sunny Skies and Summer Kisses

She gulped, not knowing how to deal with this new state of play between them. She felt suddenly overwhelmed by it all. She needed to get away from here; needed to get her head straight. This… this newthingthat had suddenly happened between them had rocked her equilibrium to its very core. Anoushka found she suddenly didn’t know how to be around him. ‘Right, well, if that’s it, I’d best head home; I’ve got lots to do.’ Her words spilled out in a rush. It was glaringly obvious that was a fib; she’d intended to take the full day off before Gabe had rung her.

Meena and Saskia rushed over to her, hugging her tightly. ‘It’s been great meeting you, babes,’ said Saskia.

‘It so has, and you’re a natural in front of the camera. You’ve been a joy to work with.’ Meena kissed her noisily on the cheek. ‘Not like some of the prima donnas we have to tiptoe around,’ she said, lowering her voice.

‘Yeah, you should seriously consider a career change. Maybe you’d get another chance to lock lips with…’ Saskia flicked her eyes Gabe’s way and gave Anoushka a wide grin.

‘Oh, well, I don’t—'

‘Yep, sure, that’s fine, we’ve taken up your afternoon,’ said Jake before Anoushka could finish. ‘Though I might need to get in touch if we need to do any further close-up shots, but from what I’ve seen so far, everything’s looking good.’ He looked triumphant. ‘And thanks for coming to the rescue, Anoushka, I’ll be sure to see you get paid for your time.’

‘Oh, goodness, I don’t want anything for it; I was happy to help out.’ She smiled back at him, trying with all her might to quieten the riot of emotions currently hurling themselves around inside her. She glanced quickly over to Gabe, not quite meeting his eyes. ‘I’ll see you later.’ She went to walk away, suddenly realising her car was parked up at Oak Tree Farm; Gabe had brought her. ‘Oh.’

‘Noushka, wait up.’ In a moment, Gabe was next to her. ‘I’ll run you home.’

‘It’s okay, I’ll walk; it’ll do me good.’What are you talking about? It’ll do you good?Keeping her eyes fixed to the path, she continued along.

He fell into step beside her. ‘But it’s miles, and it’s scorching. A walk in this heat will do you anything but good; you’ll get heatstroke.’

Realising she sounded silly, she backed down. ‘Okay, good point, thanks.’ Her lips were still tingling from his kiss; she had no idea how she was going to manage being in such close proximity to him, especially when the urge to repeat what they’d just done was all she could think about. At least the journey was only a short one, she thought thankfully.

For the first few minutes they drove along in silence, a new frisson crackling between them. Anoushka could almost hear Gabe’s mind turning over beside her. He was fidgeting, rubbing his hand over his face, scratching his head, drumming his fingers on the steering wheel. She could sense he was bursting to say something. Eventually, he could hold it in no longer.

‘Noushka, you can’t tell me you didn’t feel it too. That kiss! I mean, I’ve never experienced anything like it in my life.’ He pushed his fingers into his hair. ‘It… it rocked my world. You rock my world.’ He glanced across at her. ‘And you felt it too. I know you did. I mean, the way you kissed me back… it was… it just… the look in your eyes… I saw what you were feeling. Man, Ifeltit. You can’t seriously expect me to believe you don’t feel the same as me.’ He paused for a moment, his voice sounding suddenly despondent. ‘Unless you’re a bloody good actress, of course.’

Anoushka’s heart was thudding hard, her chest heaving as she gazed out of the window as the moors passed by. He was right; she couldn’t deny it. How could she? The feelings she’d been trying her hardest to suppress had suddenly burst free and now infiltrated every part of her being. This was like nothing she’d experienced before: powerful and utterly overwhelming. And it scared her. Really scared her. But somehow, she was going to have tell him she hadn’t felt what he was so sure of. It was too much. Her heart wasn’t ready to open up and expose itself to something that felt as big and all-encompassing as this. And there were other things to consider too. There were certain implications of being in a relationship with Gabe that terrified her. Being in the media spotlight, for one; having their relationship under close scrutiny. The thought of that made her shudder. Then there was the fact that he’d have to be away for months on end, then there’d be times she’d have to join him in far off places. How would that affect her dance school? She couldn’t just drop everything. But then again, she’d never felt anything like this before. She couldn’t deny she’d fallen utterly head-over-heels in love with Gabe. It made her acutely aware that what she’d had with Damon was a pale imitation of love; if it had been love at all. But the thing she was most fearful of was what was really holding her back. What if she gave her heart to him and he walked away? Decided he didn’t want to be with her anymore? Rejected her love. Abandoned her, just as her birth mother had.

Her throat tightened; the thought was utterly, utterly unbearable.

She was relieved when they approached the village sign for Lytell Stangdale. The opportunity to escape to the sanctuary of her bedroom and give her head the clarity it very much needed right now was at last within reach.

‘So, here we are.’ Gabe stilled the engine and turned to face her. ‘When can I see you again, Rose?’

‘Gabe, I…’ Oh, God, this was so hard. She needed to think. Needed to get her head around this. Was she ready to take the next step with Gabe? Once she did, there’d be no going back. ‘Gabe, I need to think about this. I don’t want us to get it wrong.’ She took a deep breath. ‘I don’t know if I’m ready for a relationship. I’ve promised myself the dance school has to be my priority for the foreseeable future. What if I can’t be the person you need me to be?’ Her gaze was fixed on her hands twisting in her lap.

‘Noushka, I don’t need you to be anyone other than the person you are. You, exactly as you are, that’s who I’ve fallen in love with. And I totally understand what you say about the dance school; I wouldn’t expect you to give it anything less than your full attention.’ He reached across and put his finger under her chin, turning her face to him. ‘But surely that still leaves a little bit of space for love?’

Their eyes met and the frisson sparked up once more. Her breath caught in her throat and she quickly tore her gaze away as myriad emotions hurled themselves around her body. She couldn’t deny the power of her feelings for Gabe, but it was their very strength that made it impossible for her to give her heart to him. It was just too big a risk.

‘I’m sorry, Gabe. You’re a really amazing guy, but I don’t want to mess you about. I just don’t think… I… I’d better go.’ Biting down on her bottom lip, she opened the door and climbed out of the car. Her heart was squeezing in her chest and she felt tears burn at the back of her eyes. There was no way she could look back. She knew what would happen if she did.

40

AUGUST

It had been a battle to play down her role in Gabe’s video to her family and friends. Lily and Lucas had been bouncing with excitement when she’d told them. ‘Why didn’t you tell me, then I could’ve been in it too?’ Lily had said.

‘Because you were out at Go Ape with your friends, Lils,’ Anoushka had said, doing her best to act nonchalant. ‘And anyway, it was no biggie really. I was just helping a friend out.’

‘Course you were, Noushka,’ Lucas had said with a smirk.

Her parents had exchanged knowing looks, the happy smiles that had danced over their mouths had made her roll her eyes inwardly. ‘It doesn’t mean anything, you two, so don’t go getting yourselves carried away.’ If only they knew of the torment raging inside her.

‘Course we won’t, lovey,’ Kitty had said unconvincingly.

Anoushka had been in the pub, sharing a drink and a bowl of chips with Brogan and Kristy the following Friday when she’d told them. Fiddling with the base of her wine glass, she’d used the speech she’d spent hours preparing, playing everything down, adopting a casual tone in the hope of keeping their match-making impulses in check. Their giddy reaction told her she’d failed miserably. ‘Flippin’ ’eck, Noushka, this is serious news!’ Kristy had said, her voice shrill, while Brogan had squealed excitedly. Anoushka had groaned as heads had turned with interest.

‘Honestly, would you keep it down?’

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