Page 65 of Sunny Skies and Summer Kisses

The following morning, Anoushka was sitting at the kitchen table, working on her laptop, dealing with the last of the orders that had come in. It had been a hard slog and she was struggling to focus. She’d barely slept the night before and was glad there were no dance classes today, for more than one reason; she didn’t relish the comments that would no doubt ensue from some of the parents after last night’s interview. The room was warm from the languid sunshine that poured in through the open windows along with the song of a blackbird perched in the apple tree. Kitty wandered in from the garden, her hands filled with freshly cut flowers. ‘These smell wonderful, especially the stocks,’ she said, setting them down on the draining board and heading to a cupboard to fetch a vase. She was a keen gardener, just like her mum had been, and spent hours tending their large garden.

Anoushka glanced up. ‘Mm, they look really pretty too.’

‘Fancy a cuppa when I’ve finished arranging these? Or there’s some homemade lemonade in the fridge if you’d prefer a cool drink.’

‘Yeah, lemonade sounds good. I’ll get it though. How about you? Tea or lemonade?’ She closed her laptop down, glancing across at her step-mum, whose cheeks were pink with the heat.

‘Mmm. I think I’ll have a lemonade too.’

With the flowers arranged in a vase and placed on the windowsill, Kitty joined Anoushka at the table. ‘So, how are you feeling, chick?’ Kitty reached for the jug, ice cubes rattling as she poured the lemonade into her glass.

Anoushka gazed into her drink; she didn’t need to ask what her step-mum meant. ‘Ughh! I can’t believe I’m in this mess.’ Her shoulders sagged as she sat back in her chair.

‘Mess?’

‘Yeah, mess. I’m, just… I think…’ She huffed out a sigh. ‘I don’t actually know what to think. It’s all so bloody confusing.’ She rubbed her hands briskly up and down her face. ‘What am I going to do, Mum?’

‘Well, that all depends, lovey.’

‘On what?’

‘On you.’

‘What d’you mean?’

Kitty sat back in her chair, her kind eyes looking at Anoushka. She took a moment before she spoke. ‘Would you like me to be completely honest with you?’

Anoushka knew what her step-mum was about to say would come from a place of love and good intention, but all the same, it didn’t mean she was going to like it. Still, she valued Kitty’s opinion, so she nodded. ‘Yes,’ she said in a small voice.

‘Well, before I go any further, I just want to stress that I don’t want you to think that I’m interfering or being a busy-body, but having been in your shoes, I kind of know what you’re going through. I love you to bits, chick, and just want you to be happy. So,’ she said, getting comfy in her seat, ‘now we’ve got that out of the way, the first thing I would say is, it might be a good idea if you think about whether or not you’re being completely honest with yourself as far as your feelings for Gabe are concerned.’

Anoushka drew in a deep breath and gave a small shrug of her shoulders. ‘It’s complicated.’

‘It’s only complicated if you make it so. And, I hope you don’t mind me saying, but you seem to have set yourself a load of rules – for want of a better word – and from where I’m standing, they just seem to be making your life difficult. They look like they’re actually getting in the way of your happiness. I’d go as far as to say it’s almost like a kind of self-sabotage.’

‘Self-sabotage? And what rules do you mean?’ Anoushka’s forehead crumpled with a frown. She’d never considered that her promises to herself could be having the opposite effect she’d hoped they would.

‘Well, for starters, there’s the one where you can’t think about getting emotionally involved with anyone because you just need to focus on the dance school; that it needs your full attention.’

‘But it does.’

‘Are you sure about that?’ Kitty looked at her, smiling gently.

‘And then there’s Gabe and you.’

Anoushka’s eyes dropped from Kitty’s gaze. ‘There’s no Gabe and me. He’s a friend, nothing more.’

Kitty reached across and squeezed Anoushka’s hand. ‘Oh, sweetheart, when are you going to stop fighting it? What happened with Damon doesn’t mean you can’t find happiness with Gabe. I know exactly how you feel. When I left Dan, I couldn’t imagine ever being free to love your dad, but I’m glad to say, after an almighty internal battle with myself, I soon realised that I wasn’t going to be happy unless I opened my heart to him. And I don’t regret it for a single moment; it’s the best thing I ever did. I look back now and can’t believe I held off the way I did, but I was cautious after what had happened with Dan, didn’t want to unsettle Lucas and Lily. But I know I’d never have been properly happy if I wasn’t with your dad – and you, too.’

‘I’m so glad you let yourself love Dad.’ Kitty’s words resonated with Anoushka. She was inexorably glad Kitty had come to her senses too. ‘But you and he were childhood sweethearts, you had a history together.’ Before Kitty could reply, Lucas charged into the room, his face covered in beads of perspiration, his damp sandy-blond hair pushed up at the front. He’d been playing football with his friends on the local playing fields. Ethel and Mabel, who were stretched out in the cool of the utility room, briefly opened their eyes, closing them again with a groan; it was too hot to move.

‘Flippin’ ’eck, I’m absolutely parched. It’s boiling out there. Ooh, man that lemonade looks good.’ He grabbed a glass and poured himself a drink, gulping it down noisily.

‘Lukes, you’ll give yourself stomach-ache, drinking like that,’ said Kitty.

‘I won’t you know.’ He grinned and released a loud belch. ‘See.’

‘Lucas! That’s awful!’ Kitty couldn’t help but giggle as she shook her head despairingly.

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