Page 13 of Find Me Again

He didn't have a choice, after all. There was no way he'd risk their friendship for anything, no matter how tempting it sometimes was to reach out and—

No.

Needing a distraction, Ryan turned to Neil, only to find him staring at the valley before them, the trees changing colors into vibrant red and yellows amidst all the green.

"What's with you today?" He nudged Neil with his elbow. "Did something happen at the practice?"

The hockey varsity team had a big game tomorrow, so there'd better not been any last-minute drama.

"Nothing bad." Neil shook his head, glancing at him briefly. "We went through the game plan and we're ready, all we need is not to choke tomorrow. Which we won't," he added rightaway, sounding confident, but Ryan didn't miss the way he was wringing his fingers on his lap.

"You haven't choked since your second game ever last year," Ryan reminded him. "You're going to be fine."

"If we win this, we have a real shot at the state championship. We need better than fine."

"I know, I know. You've been doing great the whole season, though, so your chances are good. Besides, you have the home game advantage.AndI'm going to be screaming my face off in the stands, so, you know. You need to play at least as good as my cheering will be."

Neil snorted. "Will there be pom poms?"

"Nope. I'll only bring pom poms for your Stanley Cup finals, nothing below that."

"High bargain."

"Gives you something to strive for, doesn't it?"

Ryan grinned at the burst of laughter he'd finally gotten out of Neil, but when he turned to him again, he froze, suddenly unsure. Neil's laugh cut off as he stared at Ryan, whose heartbeat kicked up a notch.

"Hey, can I try something?" Neil whispered, untangling his hands.

Ryan nodded, confused his friend would even ask, but then Neil closed the small gap between them, put his hand in Ryan's hair, and kissed him.

Neil kissed him.

On the mouth.

Ryan had very little idea of what to do—more of that—or say—yes, yes, yes—but it only took him a split second to kiss Neil back.

It was softer than he'd ever imagined. And slower. They started and stopped, and then started again, and it took a while before either of them even opened their mouths to deepen thekiss.

Damn, it was good.

For all that Ryan had kissed a few girls, it had never, ever felt like this. After the initial uncertainty, Neil grew more sure, more demanding, and Ryan wanted nothing more than to let him do whatever he desired. The grip Neil had on his hair and the way he pushed his tongue into Ryan's mouth made Ryan hard in record time, and he gasped into the kiss.

Then he wound his arm around Neil's waist and pulled him in, only for them to draw back and inhale sharply as their erections rubbed against each other.

Neil's eyes were shining, his mouth wet, and his hand moved to the back of Ryan's neck, which was apparently a very,verysensitive part of his body.

"Do you want—?" Neil whispered hoarsely, dropping his gaze to Ryan's lips.

Yes. Anything.

"Yeah," he murmured, toes curling in anticipation. "Yes."

Next thing he knew, Neil rolled him onto his back and propped himself up on his elbow as he lay half on top of Ryan.

Despite the cold, hard surface under his back, it felt almosttoogood. Like whenever Ryan had to wait before jacking off and then finally grabbed his erection—the relief, the pleasure, and the hint of pain all in one.

Neil rolled his hips, and a quiet gasp escaped Ryan's mouth as he clasped his hands on Neil's lower back before sliding them to rest on his sides. To hold on.