Page 37 of Single Glance

“That might be true,” she said, “but you’re not giving yourself enough credit, Hads. You’re the best, and if other people don’t see that, it’s on them, not you. Give Cam a chance. Let him in.”

God, she made it sound so easy. Could I really just let Cam in and trust he’d stick around? If I let down my walls, threw away all my defenses, would it be worth the risk?

Who was I kidding? Cam had already decimated them. Every moment we spent together, he proved worthy of my trust.

As much as I tried to deny it, I’d spent years hiding. After all, it was easier to keep everyone at a distance than risk getting my heart broken again, worried someone would see the real me and deem me unworthy. Or worse—squash my spirit and bend me to their will.

Even when we hated each other, Cam had never done that. He took my comments, understood my teasing nature. He might have pushed back, but he knew when to turn that off. Cam was steady, a force that rattled against my nature, but I needed it at my back.

“Okay,” I whispered. “I’ll try. Who knows? Being friends with Cam might not be the worst thing.”

I left off the end of my sentence, the one that screamed I wanted so much more than friendship with Cam. After a few hours of pleasure, I wanted to spend more nights wrapped up in his sheets, to wake up in his arms, to cheer him on in the crowd and see that adorable wink he saved just for me.

For a moment, I thought about telling Victoria that exact sentiment.Not over the phone. This was an in-person conversation, with alcohol and chocolate on standby. Victoria had every right to be upset with me. After all, this was the biggest secret I’d ever kept from her, but I doubted she would be. I knew my best friend’s heart, almost better than my own. If Cam and I had something real, she’d give us her blessing.

At least, I was pretty sureshe would.

A rock dropped into the pit of my stomach. That was, if Cam hadn’t changed his mind. Our last conversation echoed in my mind, and I cringed, thinking about how I’d slammed the door on our burgeoning relationship. I hid the truth behind Victoria, using her as an excuse to keep Cam at arm’s length.

As we said our goodbyes and I hung up the phone, I walked over to the window and watched the sky open. Thunder and lightning crackled in the darkness, illuminating the shadows of the main house. It felt like a sign from the universe, encouraging me to wait until morning, to make sure that this was the right path. Maybe I wanted more with Cam, but life wasn’t that simple. Just because I willed something to happen didn’t mean it would all work out like I wanted.

I was the girl who leaped first, never worrying about where I might land. With Cam, for the first time in my life, the fear of falling held me back.

Because to jump and miss this time wouldn’t risk only my heart—it could tear apart this little family I’d grown to love as my own. As I imagined life without Emilia or Victoria at my side, my heart ached, deep confusion rotting through my determination.

With another crackle of lightning, I forced myself back to bed. Even though I blamed the weather, I knew there was another reason I couldn’t keep my eyes closed.

TWENTY-NINE

“Daddy?”

At the sound of Emilia’s frightened voice, I instantly sat up in bed, pulled from a deep sleep. The sky was still dark, so it must have been the middle of the night, but my daughter was curled up at my side, shaking with fear.

I wrapped my arms around her and pulled her close. “What’s going on, Em?”

“The storm,” she said. Her voice sounded high, like when she was younger. While she was only six, there were days when it felt like she was growing up too fast. I loved watching her grow and change—seeing glimpses of the woman she’d become one day. She was bold, fearless, and kind, a force I hoped would only grow with time. But time passing pulled at my heartstrings, knowing that, soon enough, she wouldn’t need her dad to be her hero, rushing into the night to slay her dragons. Time was the ultimate thief. No matter how hard I tried to hold on, the days passed faster and faster each year.

Warmth filled my chest when she snuggled closer, her breathing steadier than it was moments ago. “I don’t like thethunder.” Her words were little more than a shaky whisper in the dark.

“Me either, Em,” I lied, savoring having my daughter safe in my arms. I ran my hand over her hair. “What does Mommy do when you’re scared?”

“She sings me a song.”

I chuckled. “Trust me, little bug, that won’t help much. My voice isn’t nice like Mommy’s.”

“I know. Hadley says it sounds like you’re stepping on Laila’s tail.”

“Oh, does she?” I couldn’t help but smirk. Of course, the woman had to give me grief even when I wasn’t in the room. “What else does Hadley tell you about me?”

“That you’re the best daddy in the world.” Emilia yawned and nuzzled into the pillow. “That you’re strong and kind, and that you’re always there for me, even when I don’t see you.”

Heat rushed through my veins. The words weren’t ones I’d ever thought I’d hear Hadley say about me, which made them matter even more. She saw me, saw how much love I wanted to give my daughter. I wasn’t a perfect dad by any stretch of the imagination, but Emilia was my greatest gift—the number one priority in my world. If she felt safe and loved, I considered my job well done.

Emilia toyed with my arm like she often did with her stuffed animals when she was trying to fall asleep. “Did you know Hadley doesn’t have a daddy?”

My eyes blinked open, searching through all our past conversations. There had been plenty over the years, mostly with Victoria or Emilia as the glue. Even so, I knew little about Hadley’s home life. Shit, I didn’t even know where she was from. When we firstmet, she said Massachusetts, which made me picture luxury homes along the coast of Cape Cod. That could have still been true, but my gut told me it wasn’t. Hadley rarely talked about her family, and the one time I got the nerve to ask Victoria, she told me I’d have to talk to Hadley, that it was her story to tell.

I glanced toward the window, where a tendril of lightning lit up the backyard with violent hues of violet and silver. It was just enough that I could see the carriage house in the distance, where Hadley slept.

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