Page 59 of Finding Michael

“I know.” Tristan leaned back on the sofa. “The bigger part of me thinks I needed the change. All I’ve ever known was the dysfunction of my family. If you can’t fix it, you either toss it or buy a new one. Still won’t work? Sweep the problem under the rug. Still not enough? Ignore it and shove more money at it. Want something? Use the family name and cash to get it. That’s a crazy life.” He stood, then paced the length of the living room. “I don’t know.”

Michael picked at the band of his watch. He didn’t have a grand answer. Hell, his life was its own ball of crazy. But he had to help Tristan. “I’ve always been told to follow my heart. Good or bad. My heart is my compass. It’s steered me in odd directions, but none I’ve regretted.” He looked up at Tristan. “What does your heart say? Look deep and think about it.”

“Michael.” Tristan’s shoulders slumped again.

He stared at the man he’d fallen for. He’d kept so many things bottled up and needed a release. “My heart wants you. I’ve got a good chance at being dicked over again, but I’m not shying away. I’m happiest with you. I don’t want you to go. If I could, I’d tether you to me.” He paused to consider what he’d said. Shit. “Okay, that’s extreme, but I like the way you make me feel. I like your overuse of the word love and your tendency to leave stuff everywhere. Your smile disarms me and so does your laugh. I want you to stay here, but I can’t force you.”

Tristan sank onto the overstuffed chair. “Do you love me?”

Yes.“I’m… I don’t know.” Why was he holding that last part back? Fear?

“You don’t.”

“Tristan.” He knew, but terror swept over him. What if Tristan didn’t love him, too, despite his declarations? What if every time he’d said love, he didn’t mean it?

“Come to New York with me.” Tristan hopped over to the sofa and grabbed Michael’s hand.

“Now?”

“Yes.” Tristan’s eyes shimmered.

“No.” He couldn’t just drive off to another state. Not right now.

“Why?”

“How? It’s a long-ass drive.” Besides, he didn’t want to be cooped up in his car for that long.

“We’ll fly. I called my friend Reg. He’s sending his jet to the county airport. It’ll be here in an hour.” Tristan squeezed Michael’s fingers. “Please? I can’t do this alone.”

“We have an airport in this county?” Michael blurted. He pieced through what Tristan had said. “What can’t you do alone?”

Tristan scooted to the edge of the cushion. “Come to my world. I need you with me.”

“To do what?” He shook his head. “I don’t understand. This is irrational. All of a sudden you want to go to New York.Wearen’t even awe. Besides, you’re not answering my questions.”

“I’m horrible at relationships. Until you, I imploded every one of them. I couldn’t handle the stress. Here, in Sullavan, I’m myself. I’m not stressed. I’m level and doing things. But I have a life in New York. Just come with me and help me prove to myself that I don’t need whatever it is I can’t shake in New York.”

“Tristan.” He knew damn well what Tristan couldn’t shake. “You’ve got Cody.”

“Hon, I don’t have him. He’s the one who I thought was using me to climb the social ladder. Turns out, he had eyes for someone else.” Tristan shrugged. “The man Cody wants doesn’t want him. We’re just friends, but I’d love to get him paired up. The one I want to be with is you.”

“What?” He had to think this one through. So Tristan had been with Cody, but Cody wanted another guy who wasn’t interested?Jesus.He had a soap opera going on in his life and he was only a bystander.

“You’ll get to ride in a jet. Where else are you going to get to do that?” Tristan grinned. “It’ll be fun.”

“You’re spoiled.” Half of Michael wanted to give in, but the rest still wasn’t convinced.

“You think I’m bad now, you should’ve met me two years ago. This is nothing.” He tugged Michael in close. “I need this. I need you. No one grounds me like you.”

“And Cody isn’t in the picture?” He wanted to be sure.

“He’s not. The whole reason he came here was to split us up. Just…” Tristan shook his head. “It’s complicated and part of the reason I’m begging you to come to New York.”

“But…”

“The only person I want is you.”

“I heard him say you were going to live in that house together.”

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