Page 7 of Through the Fire: Matt & Adam

“I’d hope so.” Adam stepped up to Matt and smoothed the front of Matt’s shirt. “You’re worried again. I thought I’d helped relax you. No?”

“No.” Matt grasped Adam’s hands. So many thoughts ran through his mind. He wasn’t sure where to start. “You don’t have a boyfriend, do you? Someone who is on his way home to you or across town worried about you?”

Adam shook his head. “Nope.” He let go of Matt and tugged the front of Matt’s shirt, dragging him into the kitchen. “I’m the boyfriend type. I like to know I’ve got one guy to come home to. One that cares about me and isn’t interested in cheating or open relationships or anything.” He shrugged and pulled a pan from the cupboard. “There’s a fire burning outside and smoke all over the place. What’s wrong with taking advantage of the situation?”

Plenty of things were wrong with the situation, starting with Adam’s confusing statement: “He is the boyfriend type.” Fine. Wanted monogamy. Perfect. But what did that have to do with using the fire as a reason to get together? Matt leaned against the counter.

“I’m a booty call,” Matt said. His shoulders slumped. “Oh my God.”

“What?” Adam poured water into the pot then frowned. “What are you talking about? Who asked you for that?”

He’d been alone for too long. Nothing made sense, and he was jumping to crazy conclusions. Fuck. Matt smacked his forehead. “Just forget I said anything. God, I’m delirious from the smoke.”

“I’m not sure that’s possible.” Adam placed the pot on the stove. “Okay, before we do anything else, let’s get a few things settled. You’re confused, and I’m confused, and it’s not going to get any clearer until we do some talking. Deal?”

“Sure.” Matt crossed his ankles and held onto countertop for stability. “Ask away.” He wasn’t sure he’d like the answers, but he’d go along with it for the moment.

“First, a hookup would be nice, but I really asked you over because you can’t return to your apartment. Second, I had no idea Alistair would take his freaking time with the repairs. It’s only been a few hours, but I bet you’re itching to get back into your place. Makes sense. It’s your place. Third, I’m not seeing anyone. Being a computer programmer and IT specialist is a thankless job with shitty hours. Most of the guys I meet aren’t interested in being with a guy who knows more about megabytes than he does about protein shakes. Hold up. I need to turn this on and get the sauce out.”

Adam poured a few drops of olive oil into the water then switched on the burner. When he bent over to retrieve the sauce, Matt could’ve sworn he wriggled his ass. He’d given Matt so much to think about already.

“Okay. That’s better.” Adam emptied the jar of sauce into another pot. “My mom used to watch us when we’d cook. Not so we wouldn’t get burned, but to make sure we knewhowto cook. I’ll never be a five-star chef, but I can boil water and make a mean spaghetti dinner.” He glanced over his shoulder and grinned. “What about you?”

“My cooking involves prepackaged shakes and grab-n-go salads. I never learned to cook. That was Nick’s job.” Nick, the perfect guy. Matt suppressed a groan. A lot of things seemed to make sense. Being with Adam dredged up feelings he’d sworn he’d buried: the jealousy, the guilt, and the loneliness. He’d been a dick to his brother. All along, he’d known he wasn’t going to live up to Nick’s larger-than-life persona. Nick did nothing wrong. Nick finished school in four years and didn’t need a boyfriend to be happy. Nick fought forest fires and was successful. He didn’t need to watch porn. He had the perfect life. What did Matt have? He worked at a sex shop and surfed. He’d never rescued anyone or was recognized for bravery. He got his bills paid and spent an awful lot of time alone. Nick ended up being most everything Matt wished he could’ve been.

“You are deep in thought.” Adam curled his fingers under Matt’s chin. “Want to talk? I’m good at chattering, if I’m not reined in.”

Matt shook his head once. He glanced out the window at the smoke. The streetlights and building neon weren’t visible through the thick cloud. According to the clock, it was nearly six, but looking outside, he would’ve guessed the hour to be much later.

“Matty, hey.” Adam snared Matt in an embrace. “Nick always used to tell me I am a good listener.”

Matt winced. Again with Nick. He hated to be jealous, but he also hated the feeling that he was only a minor stand-in for his perfect brother. When the smoke cleared and his apartment door was fixed, he’d get the hell out of Adam’s apartment and hope his heart remained intact. The more Adam touched him and said nice things, the more he wished he’d have never left his apartment and never got to know the guy next door.

Chapter Four

Adam didn’t understandMatt’s shift in attitude. One minute they were happy on the couch and kissing. The next minute everything seemed to go to hell. But he couldn’t fix anything if he didn’t know what was wrong. First, he needed to add the pasta to the water or they wouldn’t have supper.

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